Reacting to 'Remember Me': An Interview with Screenwriter Will Fetters
How do you recreate an event that came out of nowhere?
Photo: Summit Entertainment
NOTE: This interview contains story details that will spoil the ending of Remember Me. If you have not seen it yet, not only do I urge you to head to the theater, but you also may want to skip reading this interview until you have.
Anyone that read my review of Remember Me already knows I enjoyed it, and was one of the select few. In fact, I have strong opinions of the film, not from the perspective of how great the acting is or whether director Allen Coulter turned in a tour de force bit of filmmaking navigation, but merely at the idea behind the film and its intentions. However, it's intentions, it seems, have been largely lost on the critical community.
Remember Me has been painted as a romance story by the majority, but is it? I saw it as something entirely different. As a result, it became a case of reading review after review and saying to myself those most cliche and pompous of all phrases, "They just don't get it." But instead of writing some all-encompassing editorial of how I thought I was right and everyone else was wrong I decided to go to the source. I contacted Summit Entertainment and requested interviews with first-time screenwriter Will Fetters and director Allen Coulter. Coulter, as it turns out, is on vacation for a week, but Fetters was available for a conversation and our discussion ended up being more than enough when it came to realizing my intentions of the piece.
Fetters began work on what is a very personal script for him in 2004, at the age of 22. The story had been boiling around in his head for about two years since the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks and while trying to go to law school, it took a misunderstanding with Delaware law enforcement to finally find a starting point, a misunderstanding that can be seen in the film in a slightly fictionalized form as Tyler (Robert Pattinson) is arrested by Chris Cooper's character. In fact, Will describes the film as very personal, saying the relationship between Tyler and Caroline (Ruby Jerins) is a very literal one, resembling the relationship he has with his two younger sisters. While this relationship, and the relationship between Tyler and his family and his new girlfriend (Emilie de Ravin) and her family are central to the story, it's not specifically about those relationships.
So what is the film about? What were Will's intentions? This was the starting point of our interview, which took place on Monday, March 15, three days after the film was released to largely negative reviews (28% on RottenTomatoes) before going on to make $8 million opening weekend after being made for $16 million.
Featured below is our lengthy conversation addressing what the film is about, the critical reaction and how Fetters is handling such negativity on what is only his first screenplay.
What is the film about and what were your intentions?
Will Fetters (WF): It seems people didn't seem to get what the film was about. I think on some level, even getting what the film is about, people aren't necessarily going to like it. I think preconceptions tend to play a role, and what this film was, in a lot of ways, was a study of grief and a study of these "bolts from the blue" that alter the trajectory of life and for me the script started as a 22-year-old kid's therapy session.
I had some personal tragedy in my life and this broader event occurred and it dovetailed what I experienced as a young man into the same kind of anger and sadness that follows, and this story, this script, was a way to kind of work it out.
I think the fairest criticism that I've read is going after the basic story points, which when you write a love story you're going to tread on similar grounds, that kind of stuff I really get. Some of the dialogue is a little cute and some of it seems contrived, I get that, but I think a lot of people aren't getting what our intentions were. Like the idea I wrote this 100-page script and then with five pages left I didn't know how to end it so I did this with 9/11. It was so far from that. This whole movie is about dealing with that trauma, dealing with that anger and trying to see how people can be united and divided by it.
I thought it was interesting how some critics called the ending a cheat, but in reality isn't that exactly what that experience is? It's cheating the audience out of the bond they formed with that character as the result of a tragic and unexpected accident.
WF: Absolutely, that's exactly what it is. Ultimately, this is the challenge, I think this was kind of the paradox of doing a film about 9/11; How do you recreate an event that came out of nowhere?
I want to look at it kind of like Precious. I think coming up through the film festival circuit Precious got a lot of buzz for being dark, but with Remember Me, I think the fact it was presented to the world as this Dear John, Nick Sparks romance and it ends up being something much different has hurt it is as far as people going into it. What we tried to do with the ending, and maybe someday somebody will make a movie about the event better than we did, probably they will, maybe they already have, but as far as recreating the actual emotion of the actual experience and what I tried to do with the writing was try to foreshadow tonally and emotionally what the movie is about without actually telegraphing it literally.
We tried to give enough breadcrumbs, enough culpability for the audience to kind of have some sense, but not actually know. Because if they actually know, like in United 93 and World Trade Center, it's a very different movie going experience. So I guess [what you said was] well put, it is a "cheat," it was supposed to be devastating and with some people it just made them really angry, which it's fine to be angry, but I wish they would have kind of respected the intentions of everyone a little more. I don't think anyone was ever trying to exploit anything.
That's sort of the funny thing. I've talked to people already that said the ending was a cheat or it angered them and I told them that's perfect and asked them how they felt when 9/11 happened. People felt angry and felt cheated out of the thousands of lives that were lost. In essence, the movie puts the audience in that situation to some degree.
So, when Manohla Dargis at the "The New York Times" calls it "a shamelessly exploitative end," as did others, I fail to see what the exploitation is because this movie was always about 9/11, it just wasn't explicit in telling the audience at the outset. Similarly, when people woke up on September 11, 2001 they didn't know what the day would bring. The only way I think you can see this as exploitation is if you don't understand what the movie is truly about.
WF: I think that's the key. People who aren't connecting to what the broader message of the story is — Allen Coulter and I talked about it and we couldn't help but think of David Chase when trying to describe it. At the ending of "The Sopranos" he kind of famously said "it's all there" and everybody killed him for his ending. Our movie is tied to an actual event so in a lot of ways it's an unfair parallel, but I think for Allen and me, we spent so much time thinking about every single decision we were making narratively to do everything we could to foreshadow it.
In a lot of ways the movie is flawed in some instances, I would never step back and say it isn't. Every time I watch it there is dialogue I hear and think we could have done it differently, but as far as handling 9/11, we put the World Trade Center in the first shot. If you look at the shot setup it's deliberately done. There are three characters in that opening shot.
As far as the exploitation, I think that's completely unfair because it's been used in different art forms — books have been written, fictional stories — and I don't know what the statute of limitations on it is. I guess that's what I'm most confused by. I don't get why we're exploitive for making a really small movie that essentially deals with the emotion of the day, and how that's different from a movie like World Trade Center which, while being true, just recreates an event and puts you through it all literally again.
Before the movie came out the Internet spoiled the ending.
WF: Yeah, we knew that was going to happen.
Do you think that affected the way people went into the movie, or even caused them to not even see it because there was an immediate misunderstanding as to what it was about? Because there was a lot of talk of it being "the biggest twist in the last decade" which it really isn't a twist, it's a plot development.
WF: No, I wish people would stop using the word "twist." I really do. I think that "twist" implies there was deliberate intention to kind of fool people into thinking it was something different. There are two sides to the review coin, which is as much as I think yeah, the Internet did spoil the ending, it's really amazing to me how many critics knew from minute one exactly what was going on and they killed us for using it as a weight that was hanging around the neck of the movie, and [then] other people didn't get it and thought we tacked it on at the end.
The ending being spoiled online is inevitable nowadays in film. Would The Crying Game hold up end-wise today? I don't think so. I think it would be out — especially if you put popular actors in it — I think it would get out off the set. It's a different world. Modern media has changed, politics has changed, everything [has changed] and I think the Internet is always going to be something filmmakers are going to have to overcome. Keeping the ending to Remember Me a secret, obviously we think the experience is more pure when you don't know, but we realized we weren't going to be able to control it about the day Robert Pattinson signed on. We knew we were going to be exposed from the beginning.
Photo: Summit Entertainment
An interesting paradox I've noticed is that almost the appropriate response to the movie is to be angry for it cheating audiences out of this character they've come to know and like, and yet you don't want an angry audience because you want them to come back and see it again and tell their friends to go see it. So in essence the film works, but it almost works to its own demise, not to mention those coming out of it angry don't even realize that was part of the film's intention — to as closely mirror that experience as possible through art.
WF: That's a good evaluation, because I'll be honest, it's been like Chinese water torture reading reviews over the last week. I don't know about other people, and maybe I'll eventually form a callus and be like the George Clooney's of the world who don't have to read them, but for me I want to know how people felt, especially critics I respect. So it's been really kind of difficult to see the anger flowing.
I think this movie was always going to be polarizing. I always knew that going in. I think everybody knew that. We were going to have a certain amount of people that were never going to get it, they were going to think it was unforgivable and it was morally reprehensible and we never should have gone there. The easy kind of out for this movie, from the critic's side, is [to say you] can't believe Coulter and Fetters went there at the end and that just goes back to what I said before, the idea that anyone would think I would sit down to write a script and involve 9/11 and not have the entire movie be, in some way, about 9/11 is shocking. That's been the most confusing side.
I tell you what, just hearing someone like you and knowing that someone got it, and critics that get it, I'm holding on to them like a lifeboat. I feel as if I had ten minutes to sit down with anyone that hated it, I would hope I would be able to convince them otherwise. I was 22 when I started that script. I was a kid. I was just trying to figure out the world and the funny thing, like I said; I ended up with some clichéd and contrived plot stuff because I was so young and that was the world I was living in.
I almost think you need those clichéd and contrived moments, though, to allow audiences easier access to the characters. After all, it's only a 90 minute film and it sets out to accomplish quite a bit.
WF: The thing was, Allen always wanted to make a film about love and I think just being in love at a young age, people go through very similar situations and find themselves experiencing similar emotions. Kids are silly and self-involved and yes, everything seems like it's the end of the world and so of course Tyler thinks every thought he has is [important] and he's smarter than all of the adults. It's just the natural progression, that quarter-life crisis you go through where you try and figure out who you are and who you're supposed to be in relation to all the people you know.
Cliché is a word I'm using today only because everyone has been throwing it at me for a week, but I do think it was a deliberate choice in making the film. There's also this sense of innocence lost in America after 9/11 and I think showing young people, I know for me, my life and the world changed very significantly and I think older people had their JFK fascination, even those that were around for the Berlin Wall, for me as a writer, using young people just seemed to work for this.
I'm by no means being pretentious or arrogant, trust me I've been worn down to a nub over the last week, my ego is very much in pieces, but I still think this movie is going to find, and has connected with, a certain portion of the movie going public. When you deal with a movie that is intended to, like you said, "cheat" people out of this character they've come to love by recreating an event that cheated 3,000 families out of the human beings they loved, you're going to leave the theater devastated and some people are going to immediately lash out and I think some critics have lashed out at us personally and questioned our intentions and integrity. That has been, with a script that is so personal to me, difficult.
Fetters currently has two screenplays in development. One is an adaptation of the Nicholas Sparks novel "The Lucky One" with Scott Hicks (Shine) attached to direct and the other is a remake of A Star is Born with Nick Cassavetes (The Notebook). He tells me both of these projects are still alive, but as with anything in Hollywood, you never can tell.
Remember Me is now in theaters everywhere. You can read my review of the film right here and watch the trailer directly below.
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Nice job. I love that he admits to reading all the negative reviews and being affected by them. Too often we hear actors/writers/directors claiming they don't care what the critics say. It's refreshing for him to admit that he wants his favorite critics to enjoy his work.
I really enjoyed the movie, and this interview only reaffirmed that. I'm looking forward to his next work, especially with the rumored casting of Russell Crowe in "A Star if Born." He didn't happen to mention anything about Crowe, did he?
No, didn't really ask too much about upcoming work. Didn't really fit the intent of the piece.
I've come to RM rather late in the day – but I did watch it for the first time with no pre-conception of the ending or of the story. I got it completely – the film 'spoke' to me on a very personal level, and I just knew that whoever it was who wrote the script had an understanding of loss – there are so many little things in the film that point to that fact – how could he possibly know that we cling onto memories & that they get blown out of proportion as a result – like Tyler admitting that he and Michael probably didn't go to the coffee shop quite as often as he remembered – but enough to make it important – that's the way it is when you loose someone ..
A belated thank you for your interview & post.
If you get a chance please pass on my thanks to Will for his beautiful script & tell him that there are a lot of us out there for whom this film has made a difference – it's one that will stay in my collection forever –
Thanks to everyone involved.
Not a Rob Pattinson freaky fan but went to see movie with interest as to how 9/11 portrayed. 9/11 had a major impact in my (and so many other lives.) Did not have great expectations but have to say very impressed, wonderful screen play, excellent acting all parts (can't single out any one actor but Rob Pattinson did surprise..clearly has great potential) Exceptionally tasteful ending considering the tragic event. Considered walking out of movie before the end, having read some spoilers prior to viewing, stayed and ending was handled with utmost care, glad I stayed. Hope the spoiler alerts don't turn people away because I think that this is a wonderful movie that should be enjoyed by all. Great job to all concerned, exceptional.
I went to see this movie with an open mind not really knowing what it was all about. Thank you for making a movie with substance. I enjoyed it while also being sad at the end. But appreciate the way the ending was done. Really makes you think about the people in your life that you care about. All of the actors did a fantastic job. I would see it again, even though it's painful, but would take the journey with them again.
well, I didnt read the other post, and I read most the begining of this article and skimed the rest, and please forgive me for I can not spell that well. This movie had the best ending (full-citcle) then any movie ever in the history of film, and I have watched quit a bit. I despise today's movie endings, they most are so bad and wanting more, or cute n funny and its just OK, but remember me was perfect. The only way the writter fooled us, is that we just assummed it was present day…but when we see 9/11/2001 we think history lession? no way he is dead….I catch on quick, and forgive the writter, because that wasnt his intention to fool but to shock….perfect. He writes his first movie script, and throws the ending in last mintue, 5 pages what not, and I think its the best ending in movie history..ok ok that a bit bold but you know what I mean.
Great interview. Just watched this movie last night and I thought it was a really good movie. I can see where the movie can be misunderstood, but I viewed the movie in the same way you did, Brad.
I had heard on the internet there was a surprise ending–but I blindly forged to the theater without reading the spoilers because I wanted to experience it for myself. The entire story about the Hawkins family's grief over their son Michael's suicide and how each reacted differently to it, as seen mostly through Tyler's eyes, was good, with the romance of Tyler and Ally a plus. But the ending, although certainly it brought back memories of 9/11, was heartbreaking…just as it was in 2001. My heart stopped when the screen when blank. Then as it began again and showed the main actors' reactions and they didn't even know Tyler had died yet, I began to cry for the loss of Tyler. Don't get me wrong, I love Robert Pattinson, but this movie would have been good regardless who had played the role of Tyler. Like you said in the interview, "some people just don't get it." I went to see it twice, and will probably go again this weekend with my daughter.
Good questions and a great article.
I for one loved the story – and the "clichés" too. There's a reason they are clichés, no?
I totally agree! I cried for a good hour after seeing the movie and it gave me a renewed feeling of loss for those people who died that day. There were 3,000 "Tyler's" and 3,000 families that were hurt and what an intimate portrayal of that! I never thought of 9/11 this way before and I am truly moved by this piece of cinematic art. Well Done!
My hats of to Will, Allen, and Rob for being brave to tackle what was obviously a risky and controversial movie. I must say they did a very good job with the film.
It's sad that those shouting the loudest are people who really didn't even attempt to understand what the film was all about, but no worries because in the end, it's them who are appearing idiotic with their ignorance. I am so sorry that some of those backlash about the movie may also be because of people's hate about Robert Pattinson's popularity. The two together precludes cinematic tragedy of the unfortunate kind because the film was sincerely awesome.
I really hope that no one panned this film because of Robert Pattinson's popularity. How idiotic would that be? As I was watching the film all I could think of was that there wasn't another young actor who could have brought Tyler Hawkins to life in the same way. Robert has that unusual ability to exude vulnerability and danger at the same time. He has one of the most expressive faces in film. You could read every emotion on his face and hear it in his voice. He was brilliant in this film. I know you were not criticising the actor in your comment, Abby. It is just that I would think that critics would be able to look beyond any pettiness to give a fair critique of a film. That is what they are paid to do. So I hope you are wrong, although in some cases, EW's reviewer comes to mind, it appears you may be right.
I completely agree! It's sad that people can be so blinded by preconceptions and prejudices.
Wonderfully said! I saw the movie last Sunday, and it amazed me…I went to see a dramatic love story, but soon into it realized I was watching a film that regards feelings, thought, and focuses in on the reality of relationships, especially the aftermath of tragedy and how humans react to it. Robert Pattinson did an A+ job and although I loved him in Twilight series, he fit this role to a T! This movie was well written and directed! Bravo!
Very well said.
I was actually responding to Abby's comment…but you're right, ShariG, about hopefully reviewers wouldn't be petty. It's odd that on fan sites, the movie is rated as excellent, but on some sites where professional reviews are done, they aren't as complimentary. (Movie-goers rated it #1 on Fandango.com). PLUS, this is a movie released in only 2212 theaters on a $16 million budget, versus Alice In Wonderland in 3728 theaters on a $200 million budget and Green Zone in 3003 theaters and $100 million budgets respectively. Obviously more money was spent in marketing for AIW and GZ! (All figures taken from IMDB.com)
Great interview! I feel sorry for Will and the whole cast! I've seen it twice and will see it again.. Although I wasn't "mad" at the end, I was SAD! Very.. Took me a while to get over it. LOL My husband loved it as well, until the end. He said "WHY did you want to see it again"? (went with daughter first time) I think that is EXACTLY what happened.. Word of mouth 'it's sad' =( In today's times, not many WANT to be sad..
Very nice interview. I thoroughly enjoyed the movie, and thought it was well done. Summit has really done all concerned a disservice with the advertising campaign touting this film as a romance. Though it has a romantic element, it seems to me to be far more about two families' lessons in how to deal with grief. Having each been given one chance to learn to carpe diem and squandering that, you get the sense that the second will not be similarly wasted. Even the central character had grown and changed from the beginning to the end, learning to take the small joys and kindnesses of life with grace.
As far as using the bombings as just part and parcel of the story rather than the focus, I think that was inspired. How many people had just that experience that day, or at any other time of personal tragedy? Lesson learned: THIS is the day.
The movie wasn't perfect. The beginning was shaky, and the cutting a bit strange, but it quickly improved, and I genuinely cared about these people. I felt their loss, and was actually more sad for that than for Tyler, whose life was on a good track right then. He'd made everything right. I thought the original reason for the brother's death was better at first, but in retrospect realize that it might be too coincidental to be accepted.
I'll see it again, and would recommend it quite highly.
I also thought that the original cause of Michael's death was better in the script. Having personal ties to both WTC events the tie between the two was a definite a-ha moment for me. Like many of the critics, my initial response to the script was anger and disbelief, but I went to see the movie with an open mind, quite honestly because Rob was in it. Having lost a very close friend in 9/11 I was prepared to leave the theater before the end but ended up staying. The ending in the script was much, much harder to handle and, visually, I found it to be handled delicately and respectfully. I think 9/11 is a tragic, horrific part of our history and it should be repeated and told in all art forms and NEVER unspoken or forgotten.
I agree, it is something that must ALWAYS be remembered. Hence the title, Remember Me. I think they handled the event in a tasteful way. I could understand if they showed the buildings at the end and then actually showed the plane going into the first building (as I feared they were) but they did not. It was handled in a respectful manner and everyone involved in this movie should be praised.
I have a question for you two since you seemed to understand the reason behind Michael's suicide. I must have missed the reason behind it in the film. All I remember is Tyler stating that Michael has begun working at their father's office. Is there something I missed in that?
If anything, I hope that Fetters knows and understands that the majority of the movie-going audience who saw Remember Me this past week has been immensley moved by it and do "get it." Critics are obviously more than split but audiences haven't been…Even my elederly parents were dumbfounded by the critical response to a movie they clearly loved when I took them on Sunday. I believe the only thing shameful about Remember Me are are the critics who have cheapened a noble effort without so much as looking back — almost gleeful in their determination to tell movie audiences to stay away. Many of them so lazy that they failed to notice all of the signposts throughout the film and just assumed 9/11 was tacked on as an afterthought. More of them just so nasty in their criticism and caught up in some kind of knee jerk reaction that they felt the need to become some patriotic superhero out to save the public from being reminded of Septemeber 11th and be damned with what the filmmakers real intentions were. The people who do end up at theater have — in large part — come out talking about what a wonderful film Remember Me really is and I hope that as more discussions go on about it, RM will find a bigger audience. It deserves to be seen and Fetters and the filmmakers deserve respect for what they tried to do here. I'm ashamed that so many people who specialize in critical thought and analysis couldn't look deeper and see what this film really was, is and will be to people even if it wasn't their cup of tea. And I'm thankful that some did understand and are taking the time to write about it so thank you for this interview. I hope things like this help build word-of-mouth and get more people out to see this film. And I hope that someday there are a few critics who feel comfortable enough with themselves to admit they may have been terribly wrong about Remember Me.
Very good coopergirl…….I agree with all that you said and hope that RM will find it's audience and people will give it a chance – it's a great movie and deserves to be seen…….as you said.
What happened 9 years ago was a horrible tragedy and I for one am glad they brought it up again – we must never forget it.
i totally agree – i've seen the movie twice now and i'm encouraging everyone i know to go (and not look at anything online about it)
this movie honored those who lost their lives that day and the families left behind in a way that's never been done before, at least in my opinion. what i was left with as he was looking out of the window was that this story – these characters that by the end you're truly invested in – is one story, ONE of thousands of stories that all were important and all of them were drastically altered by the horror of that day. you realize the scope and the tragedy because it's no longer just the life of this man and this particular story that over, it's the lives of thousands who are all someone's big brother, spouse, daughter, or the love of someone's life. all of the hopes and dreams that you put on this one character are multiplied beyond anything you can comprehend. that's why it moved me and that's why i'm being brought to tears right here typing this. it's a powerful film and i'm saddened that critics don't seem to get it – the ending is not what makes this film, it could probably be a powerful film without it, but it brings a complexity that makes it truly great
I saw the movie twice. I loved it! It's the first movie I've seen in a long time that made me FEEL something when I left the theater and still lingers in the back of my mind. It may not have the financial gain or critical acclaim hoped for but you have people talking for sure! Be proud of your work Mr. Fetters.
Thank you for this interview. Very well thought and written.
I really hope people will discover this little gem that Remember Me is.
Only Precious had the same impact on me as Remember Me.
People just don't get it, that's the problem. They're cutting the movie into little sections rather than looking at the whole. No, this movie was not just a love story, it was so much more than that. It had deeper meaning. I didn't know the ending before I went to see it, but I did notice in the beginning how it says 1991 when Ally's mother is murdered, and then after that scene "10 years later." Twist is the wrong word to use for the ending, completely. If it had been a real twist, they wouldn't have bothered showing the audience the year at the bottom of the screen. The message in this film is absolutely beautiful and I thank Will, Allan, Rob and the entire cast for doing such a wonderful job with a controversial piece. In my mind, this movie makes complete sense. I can see it as one whole story rather than a love story and then a random tragic ending, as some are saying it is. People don't get it, and it saddens me because this movie, to me, was so touching. I wish everyone could feel what I felt when I saw the movie.
Quite frankly, I don't listen to what most film critics say anymore when determining whether or not I see a movie. I have found that, more often than not, I do not agree with their assessment. I think that most crtitics, much like our politicians, have lost touch with what actually matters to people. I thought "Remember Me" was a beautiful, very moving film, and I throughly enjoyed it. For the life of me, I can not understand why the reviews were so negative.
I was so excited to see this interveiw with the screen writer. I'd been having discussions regarding the ending with various people and it's really nice to see that what I got out of the movie was actually what the screenwriter intended. I'd posted the review below on the Remember Me DVD page at Amazon.com right after I'd gotten back from seeing the film, so I think he was successful:
3 of 4 people found the following review helpful:
An unfinished life., March 13, 2010
By Mary (Arizona)
I love this movie because instead of focusing on the the last hours of a person's life and allowing that end to define them, this story takes a flawed and real character and uses his journey to find himself to make us appreciate the untold story of everyone whose life ended before they'd gotten to a discernable finish line.
My husband asked me what the movie was about, and I told him that I couldn't tell him what the movie was about without making him miss the point of the movie. The movie is about the ending, without being about the ending because it forces us to get to know the character and take a journey with him. Tyler's life wasn't about the end of the movie, it was about all the moments that got him there. Seeing the movie without any preconceived notions, we are all in the same position that he is in, not understanding that tomorrow isn't promised. This movie is about potential, lost.
See the movie without seeing the reviews. It's worth it. You can't appreciate the journey if you're already focused on the destination. Carpe Diem.
(I guess I couldn't really be any more cryptic if I tried.)
Something in my gut is telling me to go see this movie. The same thing happened with "Knowing" last year: so many critics said it was awful, and that they hated the ending, but there was Roger Ebert standing alone saying how amazing it was, and then you, Brad Brevet, also reported it as a great movie, and I knew I just had to see it. So I did, and I loved it. I feel the same may happen with this movie.
I listen to Roger Ebert, too. He is the one critic I usually agree with. I'm proud that he didn't jump on the negative train. He may not have loved it as much as I did, but he at least got the intention.
This film will be a classic! It is a great film and I see nothing explotive about it! A lot of people don't want to see sad pictures including me! I didn't want to see it, but I like Robert Pattinson and I like his movies and he never fails to amaze me! All the actors were excellent! They don't make them like this anymore! I wish there was the right kind of advertising on this movie, I saw an ad every now and then and it looked boring! I pray that it has good word of mouth and people give it a chance!
I completely agree with you. The thing that gets me riled up is what some of the critics said. How can this story have "a shamelessly exploitative end," As Manohla Dargis said when there are tons of movies that have recreated moments just like 9/11. For example, as you mentioned above, The World Trade Center.
Is it exploitive when movies about the World Wars came out? How about D-day or Pearl Harbor?
Yet, they are making such harsh comments about this movie, that is phenomenal by the way. A movie that lets us go into the mind of a 21/22 year old right before 9/11 happened. Letting us see what any one person might have been going through without knowing what was to come.
Instead of just showing us what we already know. I'm sure everyone that could watched the news and saw it with their own eyes, but they couldn't possible know what a citizen from New York had been dealing with.
Sorry if I might have sounded repetitive.
And of course they should feel cheated, angry and hurt after watching this movie. That is exactly how many people felt that day after losing family or friends. Even if they do feel those emotions it is no where near to what people, who dealt with this first hand, must have felt.
I just believe that critics are lashing out because of the strong emotions it must have evoked from them because someone straight out didn't say it's a movie about 9/11 as the movie the World Trade Center had basically done.
Critics are being irrational and need to go find the nearest theatre and sit their butts down and watch "Remember Me" again and again until they can appreciate it and get it through their thick skulls that it is NOT exploitive in any way.
And if not I would gladly and with pleasure like to smack some sense into them. Actually I kind of want to do that anyways….
Will and Rob and all involved with the actual film should be proud. I think the problem is not with the film itself but with the way it was marketed. I'm a New Yorker and I saw Remember Me twice and have been recommending it to people. I have to say though that I've been giving them fair warning about time and place (they can put two and two together) because for those who actually experienced 9/11 firsthand, it'd be cruel for me to send them in blind all over again. That's the kind of thing that creates a knee jerk negative reaction that sadly overshadows the film's merits. Knowing the ending did not take away from my appreciation of the film.
As for the critics, I don't listen to them.
I thought the movie was beautifully done, and while I was concerned that the end would feel exploitive, it didn't at all. I worked in the Towers for years, met my husband there, and lost many friends there on 9/11. I understood what Will was trying to accomplish, and I saw the movie as a family drama and a study in grief. I think Summit's ad campaign ("Live in the Moments") didn't help the movie, and a lot of people I know didn't see it because of the 9/11 angle. I'm hoping that people will appreciate the movie more over time.
I've seen Remember Me twice now, and the emotional impact this film has had on me is profound. I could empathize and relate to all of the characters, who're all impacted by losses they've suffered and who respond to those losses in very realistic, believable, human ways.
To me, the movie is about coping with loss, finding your way out of the darkness and learning to live again. Yes, there will always be pain and suffering–but from the pain and suffering, redemption and renewal come.
It's rare for a movie to stay with me as long as Remember Me has–it made me laugh, cry and think–and it's haunting me now (in a good way).
Kudos to everyone involved, and thanks for having the courage to make a movie that is honest and raw and real.
Thank you for this! I agree, that dismissing the film as being exploitative and a cheat is missing the point.
I think it would have been that way if they had built the film around that event and publicized it as such. As it was, like you pointed out, it was about a moment in time that when people woke up that morning, they didn't know what the day would bring. The film does bring out the feelings of being cheated, of Tyler's life (as a stand in for all of the other lives lost) that were cheated out of living.
To me, it's about the small-ness of 9/11, which was a huge event. It's way more personal and evocative than the films on 9/11 that I've seen, because with those films, I knew what where it was headed. But with Remember Me…it just made it more stunning and personal. It brought home, once again, that there were smaller stories within the tragedy, of men, women, and children who wouldn't be coming home that day.
I think the critics who see it as exploitative are too jaded and cynical to see that.
Loved the interview. Thanks for the great piece, Brad. This is the way I wish people would approach all movies (…well, at least the ones that intend to convey some sort of greater meaning). I definitely respect and appreciate that angle that Will and Allan were coming from. I would love for all of the critics who panned the film to read this interview.
Thanks for this. I loved Remember Me, saw it twice and plan to take my husband back next week. I felt like it was one of those "everyone has a story" movies, which is great, because everyone does. This was Tyler's moment, his place in time and he was one of the sadly unfortunate at the Towers that day. Each one of those victims had a family and a past, and good and bad and love and loss…and RM does a great job of showing us what happened to one individual and their family during that place and time.
Thank you for writing this. What a blessed relief after reading so many reviews that completely missed the point! You gave Will a much deserved opportunity to provide an honest response to the ludicrous and unfounded attack that has been waged on not only his script but also his personal ethics. I for one thought that the movie was a masterpiece and am completely dumbfounded by the response of the critics. Wouldn't it be rich if the controversy surrounding this movie ultimately led to its having a lasting place in film/American history?!
That is exactly what I was thinking and actually hope. I can already picture it being a topic of discussion somewhere on a film appreciation class because of it's controversy. And not just right now, but in the future too. Because it came to be the movie that critics labeled to have a forbidden ending, and the first one to depict 9/11 the way it did.
I rather see a movie that will genuinely make me feel such a range of emotions and make me remember a particular personal experience that I can identify with (or in this case that particular day), than watch a movie that was already digested for me to watch and it just served the purpose of entertaining me for a couple of hours.
Just right now, remembering parts of the movie I feel that pressure in my chest as it was 9 years ago, haven't found a movie like that in so long.
Great job Mr. Fetters, and if this is what you'll give us from your first script… I so look forwards for the future ones.
Sounds like the marketing kind of shot this one in the foot. I thought it was a straight up romance, and when I started hearing about the ending (I didn't read any spoilers, but the reviews I read specifically said they weren't going to tell the ending and then would talk a lot about the story being in New York City in 2001 so it wasn't hard to figure out) I thought it was a terribly cheap way to end the film. If the marketing had focused more on the dramatic aspect, of finding one's place and living life in the moment, I think people might have been more open to the ending. Thanks to this interview, I just might check this one out now.
I think that those who gave poor reviews have forgotten about the emotions of that day(9/11). It was a shock, an insane kick your teeth in kind of day. The acting in the movie was amazing. The ending very tastefully done. I'm not sure what more people would want. I left the movie feeling exactly like I should have happy to be alive and ready to live each day to the fullest.
It's refreshing to see people disagreeing with critics, and doing so openly. I get sick of movies living and dying with what the critics think about it. This movie was pretty well done. I agree with everything that has been said about it here. Let's hope that the majority of audiences reactions to this movie are like those people that have posted here, so that we can show critics that refuse to try and understand the film that they are the minority, not the popular opinion.
I hope Mr. Fetters will see these comments, or Mr. Brevet will pass them on. He has touched many people with this story and I'm sure there will be many more who will be moved. A lot of the audience 'gets' it, even if some critics do not, and I'm assuming the movie was made for us, and not for them. Criticism these days seems to have taken a turn for the worse. Many seem more concerned with writing clever, self-important pieces than illuminating or giving insight into the film they are critiquing. They no longer seem to have a modicum of respect for those who create the work on which their work is dependent. That said, there have been some thoughtful and considerate reviews and if Mr. Fetters hasn't seen it, the Newsweek article was very accurate about the place of Remember Me in relation to September 11. Thanks, Mr. Brevet for going to the source, and for your review. I'll be going back to see Remember Me again.
I think Fetters is missing the point of why people are upset. As much as you want to create a feel for a film, the shock of what people went through is still very, very real. This isn't fiction, it's real life. I know people who still have sleeping problems and PTSD from what they went through. Maybe that can even be said for myself. The promotion for this film should have respected that trauma enough to give people the choice about whether or not they wanted to put themselves through that during a night at the movies. Placing "bread crumbs" or whatever about the time line is quite simply not enough. I have a very dear friend who was remarkably close to the buildings when the first plane hit. She went into see this film thinking it was a romantic drama and has been so shaken with vivid flashbacks it's scary. She never would have gone to see it if she had known the issue it dealt with. This film translated to people who are upset as being like a wolf in sheep's clothing and, as much as it was well intended, the people who created this film need to acknowledge some responsibility for that.
While I feel for your friend, I disagree about "real life" not being material for a film. The Hurt Locker was about real life events (or perhaps a perception of them), and it won the Academy Award for best picture. Those involved in the Iraq War still have sleeping problems and PTSD, and in fact, the war is still going on! What I don't understand is why 9/11 is almost sacrosanct, so that someone who tries to tastefully represent the impact of it gets villified.
As someone who was also personally impacted by 9/11, I feel that Mr. Fetters did a wonderful job of bringing to mind the importance of living each day to the fullest. I was also very touched by the idea and point of the film, and I was very glad that it focused on those 3,000 lives and stories that were abruptly ended, rather than the heroism of the police and firefighters, as almost every other film or documentary about 9/11 seems to do.
S. Wade…well said.
It's not off limits I would just expect that if someone wants to make a film about it, they would at least have the decency to say they are making a film about it. I did not go into the Hurt Locker thinking I was seeing a dam date movie.
There are so many stories to tell about the people in those buildings and these guys have to make one up? You are indignant about firefighters and police getting the focus of the memorial documentaries but are totally fine with a fictionalized character being the emotional centerpiece of a real life event? Guess what, this movie is about a movie character, so it still by passes the real stories of the people who died. It does not honor them. It uses their death as background. And it further reinforces the notion that people have forgotten the victims. They could have actually showed the events in the lives of the REAL people and those choose not to because they weren't interesting enough for the movie. They would have had to be to honest and bound to the truth of history. It was too hard for them. Not worth the effort. It's much better to be bound to the shock of history and leave all those annoying details for people who actually care.
This movie can be fictional to be whatever it wants and then invoke a huge nonfiction event that is a reservoir of real emotion for all those who lived it and yet take on none of the responsibility of doing so. And, yes, I say responsibility. They can't have it both ways.
SB –
the depth and the soul that this movie goes into could not possibly be done by a real person unless they wrote it themselves (which would be impossible by the nature of the tragedy) this movie does not gloss over feelings and just cover big events that happen in this man's life, you're seeing him, completely exposed all cracks able to be examined and judged. now while i see your point, the connection you make with a character is very much based on how deeply you care about them and the more you know someone the more you care. and that was the whole point, the connection, the complete and absolute investment you had in this character and all of a sudden, it was snatched away. and the same thing was happening to thousands of others staring out their windows and the bright blue sky.
this movie is not "about" 9/11, this movie shows the horror and complete shock of that day by having it be a part of the character's life. this movie demonstrates what it felt like to everyone on that day picturing their loved ones trapped.
and this movie WAS honest, it may have used a fictional character, but i haven't seen a movie this honest in a long time – you say it left all those annoying details for people who actually care? really, have you seen the film? these people care, and many who see this film will care more because of it
Claire-
I disagree with pretty much your whole comment, but I am too tired to get back into it. I have to back out of this comment board. I am glad that a fictional character hits the story home more for people than the reality of those who were lost. And that emotionally sucker punching people is now considered profound. If this is what it takes to get people's attention about thousands of dead, that's pretty dam sad. Some of us can't forget no matter how hard we try and prefer to remember the people before having to fictionalize them for dramatic effect. I'm glad you liked the movie.
it does "display the reality of those who were lost" – that's why it's moving, i'm sorry if i in any way made it sound as if this fictional character has more value than people who experienced this tragedy in reality. but the reason this story impacted me the way it did was because to me he was real, he gave a face to one of the people looking out the window during this horrific moment and the fact that this one, this person i cared about was ONE of thousands who had a story is what really hit me. i absolutely agree with you that we should remember all those who lost their lives that day but i feel like this movie does that, this is a movie that honors the real people whose lives were lost that day – not one that makes them less important. maybe it's just the way i let stories effect me, i care about characters who teach me things about life and who i am and who i want to be, they're a part of me.
Sara, It has been nine years. This is not to make insignificant the feelings of those who experienced 9/11 or to in any way say that your experience of Remember Me felt did not feel like a violation of some sort to you. But truthfully the movie did not glorify 9/11 or use it in an uncaring way simply for shock value. While you may not have known 9/11 was a part of the story when you entered the theater, it did not sneak up on you. There were many signs that it was going to be in the movie somehow long before the final scenes of Tyler in his father's office. Film makers are not required to reveal the content of their films prior to our seeing them beyond the rating system that tells us if there is violence, sexual content, nudity, etc. Any movie at any time can call to mind upsetting or unsettling events in our own lives. We can't be sheltered from them and we can't always know ahead what is coming. That is a bit of the message of Remember Me. It is kind of like when a family member or close friend dies and everyone you know shies away from mentioning that person as if he or she never existed. For some people who have experienced loss, it is important that you do mention that person and talk about them. You want to remember, not the pain of loss, but the joy of who that person was. I think that's the point of Remember me. Tyler was lost in an instant of insanity, but after seeing the movie I kept thinking about this amazing young man I mourned for Tyler who was so hurt by his brother's suicide that he struggled to face his own 22nd birthday, who was so angry at his father's emotional abandonment, but was still willing to be a good friend to Aidan, still able to be his little sister's hero, still willing to give his heart away again, still able to be a caring son to his mother. You are asked to remember Tyler, not the violent act that took him away. The focus is all wrong when all you can see is 9/11.. Robert Pattinson created this character that you cared about. His performance was heartbreaking and beautiful. I hate for that to get lost in the controversy over how the character of Tyler died.
Brad – thanks for your tenacity with interviewing Will and sharing your thoughts. I was profoundly moved by Remember Me – I can't get it out of my head. I knew the ending going in and was prepared. My husband saw the first image and knew how the film would end when "10 years later" came on the screen. My dear friend had no idea it was about 9/11 until the very end. Three very different levels of anticipation of the ending. However, we unanimously loved the film. We talked about it after for an hour. We all agreed is was about grief, loss, life, and finally acceptance. We've been back to see it several more times. I rarely feel compelled to see a movie twice, let alone in the theater.
Will & Co. – if you are reading this – thank you for sharing the story in your head and making a movie to be proud of. I feel like the the people who "get" this movie and look a little closer understand they are looking at a valuable uncut diamond.
I wish you could post this article on every critic's website who had only nasty things to say about it. Maybe this will help them understand what Will, Allen and Rob was trying to put forth to the moviegoers. I loved Remember Me and I understood the premise very well. Thanks to everyone associated with this movie. You brought a real sense of how life can change in an instant and we need to live our lives to the fullest. I am so very proud of everyone, including Rob who brought the character of Tyler into our lives and hearts.
Terrific interview! I didn't know all these things about Will Fetters and about his experiences writing the story. I did "get" the story, but reading about his motivations in writing it provides even more clarity.
The story was unique and well done. It wasn't perfect but it seems to me a movie that will stand the test of time. It's very emotionally intense, and is bound to provoke intense responses. I hope Mr. Fetters will not be left too disenchanted by the negativity.
Thank you!
The film's official synopsis clearly states the setting is the summer of 2001 in NYC. If anyone doesn't automatically suspect that a film called 'REMEMBER ME' set in the summer of 2001 might have something to do with 9/11 they are not the sharpest knives in the drawer. Frankly, I think the filmmakers did more than was necessary to red flag the film for those that would be bothered.
I lost a brother in 9/11 and I knew going in to see the movie what it was about and I can assure you, I'm no Einstein. So I find the excuse that the audience needs to have it spelled out to them that the main character will die in 9/11 less than valid. If people choose not to read about a film they're going to see then buyer beware. Not the filmmakers fault.
Furthermore, if you really want to blame someone for the advertising, don't blame Fetters, Coulter or Pattinson; try blaming the studio who is in control of that aspect. Directors don't even make their own trailers in Hollywood — it's sourced out and they have very little control these days how their films are marketed unless their names are Speilberg or Scorcese.
The film was tasteful, respectful and a fitting tribute to all of those lives lost that day, including my brother. I would prefer for this outrage from people who didn't lose anyone that day to come from those who did if it comes at all. And so far from what I've seen and read, there have been plenty of New Yorkers personally affected by 9/11 who have spoken up in disagreement with the critics. If they're anything like me, I think in their hearts they know the film was made with the best of intentions and they appreciate the love and care that went into it. The rest of the "critic" world is just too blind and cynnical to get that.
I guess I am one of those dull knives :p
BUT:
# 1) I am so sorry about your loss, like I said I can't even imagine, except what I saw and felt in this film which I am sure is NOTHING like what anyone felt and
#2) I loved the film and thought it was really well made and don't understand what the big fuss is about :)
Once again, I am truly sorry for your loss
But that's just it. The filmmakers didn't do anything to red flag the film about the subject matter they were tackling. The blogosphere did the handiwork on that. I lost an uncle on 9/11 and I deeply appreciated people blowing the whistle for me to know not to see this. My younger cousin decided it was a good idea to go without knowing the end and she's having a terrible time now.
To say people "don't get it" is remarkably unfair.
Listen, some people are ready to see this fictionalized and acted out, some people aren't. But the movie folks should have allowed people to make that choice. Everyone involved with this film agreed in how it was presented to the public. Even the reviewers were told in the screenings that the end was meant to be kept a secret. I think the critics did a public service on this movie by letting people know what they were in for.
Shari G said everything perfectly – i just really understand the reason that they didn't do anything to "red flag" the movie, was anyone warned about the terrible things that would happen that day? was there any way we could have made the grief of 3,000 lives a little less sad by knowing it ahead of time? this movie perfectly depicted the absolute shock and how there was no way to see it coming and in doing so they handled the loss of that day in an accurate way, those characters had no way to expect they wouldn't be seeing their loved ones again
SB,
I agree that the marketing of the film should have been handled differently and I respect your opinion. We have had other people comment on this interview that have had loved ones lost that day as well and they liked the movie. Whether the filmmakers should have given a hint of what was coming at the end of the film will be a controversy that should be discussed. I also believe most people have also commented that for those who did lose loved ones that day they have great sympathy. I hope you know it is a movie that will move many but will also cause great pain to others and that is what the power of movies can do, whether good or bad.
John, I love your comments and agree completely. There were not gratuitous actual photographs. There were not explosions or reproductions of all of the horror of that day. There was primarily a respectful silence. In a way it allowed everyone who saw the movie to pause for a moment to remember those who died. We shouldn't forget and we should take the other part of the message to heart and that is to love and appreciate the people in our lives.
Okay normally I don't poat much on these, but I have to speak up here. I took my daughter to see Remember Me last night. I had not read any of the boards, so I had no clue about the ending or the twists. I did pick up on the dates at the beginning and was asking myself, hmmmm, whats wrong with this picture, but I try not to overanalyze movies. As someone who has lived with the loss of family and friends to suicide that storyline touched me, and by the end, I knew something was wrong. I had noticed the building before, and how they kept referencing the passing of the time. But I was blown away when I realized it was 9/11. I lost 3 friends that morning. I can't look at pictures of the towers without crying. But the way this was done, for once, it was like all of the people we lost that day were being represented, the ones not in uniform. 9/11 will always be a touchy subject. But this was the best was to deal with it. We have movies about the men and women in uniform, but we lost many people who were just there doing their jobs, or there for meetings. Robert Pattinson was heartfelt and touching and real. The whole 9/11 part of the movie is like 10 mins at the end, but it proved a point. Everything and everyone changed in a split second. Remember Me is a love story…a story of the love of a family and how that love is all that you have when everything else falls apart around you. How that love will help you come back together. Love is the strongest thing on earth. To me thats what this movie was. I know the friends I lost would be honored by Remember Me. Anyone who can't see that is blind….
Well I just got back from seeing Remember Me and I don’t even know what to say but it was devastating. I don’t mean in a bad way though, if you can actually say that. I am a huge fan of Robert Pattinson so originally that is the only reason I went to see the movie. I wasn’t THAT thrilled with the story line as far as what they showed in the trailer and commercials. Summit should really be ashamed of themselves for portraying this amazing film in that light JUST to attract the Twi-fans. This film had so much more depth to it than just a trivial love story, the fact that this family had been through so much really hit home for me because I have faced so much in my life recently and the ending? What can I say about the ending? I remember waking up on the morning of 9/11 in complete horror and shock not being able to cry or even grasp the situation at the time and so seeing this (as stupid as it sounds) was almost cathartic in a way because watching this movie allowed me to become invested in a life, whether it was of a fictional character or not and actually feel something and sort of identify on a miniscule level of what that tragedy was. Of course I could never REALLY know what any real family had to go through but it still kind of gave us an insight of some part of that day and their loss. To have people get their panties in a wad over this is ridiculous because there are going to be other movies about this and other tragic events, there have been others and to pick apart this particular one is not fair. I think that Mr. Fetters did a fabulous job and should be proud of the whole film, as well as Alan Coulter and Robert Pattinson. Number one rule, don’t listen to critics, they are idiots. Listen to the people that go see your film and more people than not are loving this film…enough said :)
I agree with much of what you wrote and your last few sentences especially. On Yahoo the critics reviews come out to an average of a C rating, but movie goers rated Remember Me at A-. I far more often agree with those who actually have watched the movies than the self important movie critics who sometimes I doubt have even viewed them.
My problem with the movie is the motivation behind the ending. It's meant to be shocking–which it clearly is–but other than the initial scene set in 1991 and the following "10 years later", there is no forewarning that it would end with _that day_. It's like a slap in the face, not because I wanted a happy ending or grew to like the characters, but because I was made to relive _that day_ without consent. I went to the movie knowing there would be a surprise ending, knowing that it would probably be sad or tragic, but about ten minutes before the end, something clicked and I realized what was about to happen. I wanted to scream at the top of my lungs to warn other unsuspecting moviegoers that it was _THAT DAY_. I have watched other movies dealing with _that_ but I did so with full disclosure, mentally and emotionally prepared to go through that again. I left the movie theatre feeling like I'd been psychologically assaulted because I did not choose to see a film on _that subject_. That is not what I signed up for. The acting was fine; the rest of the movie was fine. However, 5 hours after leaving the theatre, I still feel like I could use a therapy session. Maybe a scant 8.5 years has dulled the memory of the masses, but it's too soon for me, in that context at least. I wasn't prepared to be unwillingly made to relive _that day_.
i see your point i just feel like it was supposed to be an assault on some level, i don't think anything else has ever represented the true nature of the tragedy until this movie, the sheer shock and horror of it all, and that can definitely be unsettling – but i am sorry it hurt you, some people don't need any help remembering
My feelings, welcome or not, was that is was supposed to be an assault on the senses. It is a wake up call to everyone to not take each day for granted. His comment early into the movie about small actions need to be done…even if they are viewed as irrevelant…is sooo very true. I think he hit the nail on the head. To often we are wrapped up in our own little world…our busy lives…our own self-pity… We don't think about others that we can have an affect on. My mom was murdered very similar to the scene in the subway…that was my wake up call that every breath is not guarenteed…it is a blessing and a gift. The ending to the movie was very sensitive and tastefully handled. Films can't disclaimer everything. We all have had things happen to us that we probably would rather not remember…but sometimes we need to be reminded so that we can grow and change for the better. I was so emotionally drained by the end of the movie but I felt I came out of it with a renewed commitment to never let one day go by without touching someones life in a positive way. My final thought for the day…How do I want to be remembered when I am no longer blessed with the gift of life?
When it went from 1991 to "Ten years later," I would hope people would be able to put two and two together. 2001, NYC, 'Remember Me'… the title of the movie almost gives it away that something tragic will happen. It's not as if they titled the movie with something cheesy and played it off as a love story, with no indications in the film leading up to the ending. In the first scene of the movie the WTC is shown in the background. Think that was just there for the heck of it? I found it easy to put all of it together when I went to see the film, and I understand not everyone was able to do that. No explosions were shown, no actual document of that day was shown in the film – merely a blank screen and moment of silence, which I think is the ultimate tribute. They played it off very tastefully and respectfully.
I went in to the movie not knowing anything about it, thinking it was some romantic drama. And like you everything clicked as soon as I saw Tyler asking his dad where he was. All the crumbles as Mr. Fetters explains, came rushing in.
And they did give you hints through out the whole movie… Starting with the Date, WTC in the background and 10 years later, Tyler telling Caroline how it feels to end the 6th grade meaning they are in the summer, Tyler telling Ally he went to a coffee shop at Wall Street, Ally telling his father she is going away for Labor Day.
I saw all these details, and figured out how it was going to end. The part that I didn't expect was the main character to be the one to loose his life.
I've only seen this movie once, but I'm pretty sure there are probably more. I'm plannign to watch it again this weekend with my husband and will have to look for more crumbles.
Sorry I meant Crumbs instead of crumbles. I don't know why i was thinking about the pie
Originally I went to see Remember Me because I really like Robert Pattinson. But, I can't get the movie out of my head. I can't stop thinking about it. I keep thinking about all the unknown faces of those whose lives were taken on that hideous day. It made me realize that everyone who died on Sept. 11 had a story to tell – Remember Me portrayed one such story. Thanks to Will Fetters for penning this amazing story, thanks to Nick Osborne and Allen Coulter for believing this story was worthy of being told, thanks to Summit for believing Robert Pattinson had the clout to pull this off, and especially, thanks to Rob and the rest of the cast for wanting to be a part of telling this story which might not be popular or entertaining to everyone, but knowing that it's okay not to always be part of the "establishment mold". You were bold and brave in my eyes. I've read many harsh reviews by critics, but most comments from moviegoers have been more than positive. I don't think Remember Me will be forgotten soon.
Kathye…This is EXACTLY how the film has affected me. You took the words right out of my mouth. Well said!
I loved this movie. I am promoting it to everyone I know and plastering it all over my facebook.
I walked into it thinking it would be a romance movie and kinda whater-ish… I walked out with tears streaming down my face thinking DAMN THIS WAS PROFOUND LOVELY HERATBREAKING AND WONDERFUL. I Loved the characters, the cinematography, everything. It took my breath away. Will? If you are reading this, know you rock. Everyone I know who has seen the movie has adored it, been saddened and humbled by watching it, has taken the time to think what if? What if my last day is today? Live in the moments.
That said, 9/11 was the perfect backdrop for this movie. I was 21 when it happened, living out east not too far from DC.. I thought in this movie it was portrayed beautifully and sensitively. Tyler could have been any one of those 3000 people who died that day who all had lives and families and troubles and hopes and dreams… Remember Me will eventually be remembered for not only being amazing but also brave enough to portray one fictional character who lost his life and the countless people 9/11 affected.
Rob, Pierce, Chris, Ruby, Emile, all the actors did a wonderful job portraying life as life is. I give this an A+ and I'm making sure that everyone I know goes to see this film. Kudos, Remember Me.
I love the way you think :)
I too am promoting this film everywhere I can. I plan on writing a blog about it on my blog site and I pimp it out all over Twitter and my Facebook page and in every message thread. I even have my friends getting pissed off because they are like "jeez, this is the American Idol thread (or whatever), why the hell are you talking about that damn movie?" but I just keep writing about it. The only complaint I have is everytime I see the commercial for the movie now I cry because of the what happens to Tyler in the end. I know that sounds crazy but the movie made me feel like I was there to some extent, like I said in my earlier post.
Will, please don't let the critics get you down. I know you respect a lot of them, but personally, I've been trying to figure out for days why the critics have gone ballistic over Remember Me. It confounds me. RM is a movie that I think is one of the best movies ever. Please don't put it down in any way as cliche or lacking. It's not. And regardless cliches are cliches for a reason. But as for the critics, it's like they didn't bother to really look at the movie. They were so upset by the ending they haven't thought about the rest of the movie. If you 'get it' then the ending is part of the whole and you realize that you should have known all along. I had some thought that critics were supposed to be critical thinkers and perhaps a little open-minded, but when the general movie going public can get it and so many of them can't it makes me wonder about critics as a whole. I'm so glad someone went to the source and you got a chance to tell how you came to write a little masterpiece like Remember Me. You should be proud as hell about your movie, it's touched a lot of people.
Will Fetters should be proud of this film. I hope that people will see this movie and make everyone they love see it too. As many have said, the film sticks with you and makes you think!
Oh, and a P.S. Will, (or anyone else) if you want to read some more really thoughtful discussions of RM go over to Moviefone at their hot topics. They've got a 19 page comment section over there that is very interesting. There are a few people that had issues with the movie but people that loved it and got it far outweigh them. It might make you feel better to know that a lot of people got what you meant to say.
Chris,
could you please post the link to this Moviefone page you've mentioned? (I don't know if it's allowed to post links here though)…I would very like to read those other comments. This word of mouth about RM is absolutely extraordinary… it's creating an incredible buzz and a sort of bond between the viewers who loved it!
Thank you so much for your review and interview. I went to see the "Remember Me" on Sunday and really liked it. My husband enjoyed it as well. My niece and her boyfriend went to see it on Monday and the both liked it too. When I read the reviews I became very angry because all I could think was these people don't get it and they are depriving the audiences who rely on critics reviews when deciding which movies to see. I thought that the characters were believable and really liked their relationships. The story was very interesting and moving. I have to admit that though I knew it wasn't going to happen, I was hoping for a happy ending. When the ending came I was saddened and shocked but I barely cried and I'm a crybaby. I kind of felt on a smaller scale, the way I did on 9/11, devastated but numb and I'm still not fully recovered! It also got me thinking more individually about the people who lost loved ones that day. I think bringing that feeling back is an honor to those who were lost.
Great interview! For some reason it didn't occur to me when I was watching the movie for the first time that it was about 9/11. Just like other movies in NYC I looked at it as a character. Although when I saw the date blantantly on the chalk board my heart started beating fast and my breathing became quite eratic. The gasps in the audience were very audible. That night though going through the movie in my head all the signs were there… just not everyone was looking or knew to look. Through the course of the movie I figured that the title was in reference to his brother Michael and then to Tyler as well as 9/11 after seeing the ending.
I have to say that as far as character development this was the best movie I've seen in a VERY long time. It seems like movies now a days don't really focus on developing the characters so much anymore. I wonder why that is? I have seen this movie 4x now and it gets me everytime… not only that but I see something new and different everytime too. I will be seeing it again that's for sure and then also getting it when it comes out on DVD. I hope there will be some deleted scenes on it. I have some friends that are coming down the 2nd weekend in April and we're planning to see it then too.
I definitely look forward to Will's future works. I'll certainly be on the look out for them. Indie films are very important and unfortunately a lot of them get overlooked. We as movie goers need to make sure that we keep them busy b/c we're the ones who fund them in the end.
Anyway, I'll get off my soapbox now lol. Thanks again for doing the interview w/ Will!
I saw Remember Me on opening night, and I thought the film was phenomenal. Intense, powerful and emotional. This interview was an interesting read, to get the full intent of the writer. I in no way felt offended or angry with the end. I think it played a key role in how the entire story evolved. I think Robert Pattinson and the entire cast did an incredible job. Some scenes left me stunned and impressed with their ability, far exceeded my expectations.
I think this movie is something that everyone should see at some point and make their own judgements. The critics were way too quick to jump on the "marketing ploy" ending and I do not think it was warranted.
I also believe the trailer did not do this movie justice. It was marketed more so as a "come see Robert Pattinson" in a non-twilight love story…as opposed to the true meaning of the moive, the depth and darkness of it all. For that, I fault SUMMIT. Perhaps if it was shown as a movie with more meaning…it may of attracted more viewers.
Bottom line, I think it was incredible and I will see again in theaters. I do hope that the upcoming weeks will keep this movie in the top 5 at least…and perhaps all the negative buzz might attract people to the theater to see what all the hype is about. At which point, they can see what we're all saying!
I agree w/ you Joanne. The trailer really was geared towards Robert… most likely b/c he's the hottest actor out there right now. He certainly did earn his stripes w/ this one.
I haven't seen anyone mention the actress that played the mother… she wasn't even in the credits… I was very surprised b/c I remembered her from Parenthood all those years ago but couldn't remember her name.
I have definitely been talking about this movie to anyone I think will enjoy it.
Tammi
That is Martha Plimpton. She felt that her role was more of a cameo appearance.
It is actually Lena Olin and she was nominated for an Oscar although I am not sure for what. She is a phenomenal actress and I would really love to see Summit try adn piece together another trailer that is NOT about the love story to get another demographic into the theaters that are completely missing out. My son and his fiance wouldn't even consider going because they thought it was just another stupid love story staring Rob Pattz and all they can think about is a glittery vampire and that stupid "Robsten" that you can't get away from on every magazine and TV show, so A LOT of people are missing out and Summit is missing out on a lot of money becasue of their marketing of this film, thinking they could pimp Rob and ONLY Rob out.
Kitty, I think Tammi was referring to Ally's mother in the opening scenes. Martha Plimpton was a teen in Parenthood and she played Ally's mother who was shot on the train platform. I didn't see her in the credits either. Lena Olin played Tyler's mother.
Thank you so much for this interview! I went and saw Remember Me for the 2nd time today, and even knowing what was going to happen, it still affected me deeply. I can honestly say, that to me this is one of the BEST films ever made. Thank you to everyone involved, for making me see…and Remember again. Thank you for reminding me that it's the moments that count, and that there is never a guarantee that we will complete our journey. Thank you for reminding me that life goes on…and we need to as well.
Thank you Brad for this interview and for your insightful review. And thank you Will. Darling, don't you hang your head down for one more minute. You have told a heartbreaking, yet life affirming story. What you're dealing with right now is the 'noise' of the internet and film critics who are drowning in self importance and cynicisim. It will fade away and this film will live on. How brave of you to be the first to place a fictional character in this unimaginable world tragedy. I saw nothing exploitive here. I saw homage. The ending had to come the way it did, just as that morning came the way it did. But you didn't cheat. There were breadcrumbs left along the way.
You know, some films need some distance before they're truly appreciated. I think that may apply here. A little time. A little more perspective. For the most part, we must step back from something before we can truly 'see it.' You have written a fine story and Mr. Coulter and Mr. Pattinson and Summit have brought it beautifully to life. Mark my words, Remember Me will be…remembered. Thank you so much.
Words can not express my gratitude towards you Brad for taking the time to talk with Will and giving him a chance to explain why he wrote the script and used 9/11.
I saw the film two weeks prior to release at a press screening and was blown away by the story, and the emotions envoked by Remember Me. I was just stunned reading all the negative reviews, knowing without a doubt how off base they really were with their comments.
I saw Remember Me for the sixth time this afternoon and I love the film. It is really hard to put in words how I have been affected by this movie. It hurts me to read any negative review of the film or the actors in the film. Robert Pattinson in particular did an amazing job of bringing Tyler Hawkins to life, but every single performance was outstanding. Chris Cooper as the over protective father. Pierce Brosnan as the absent father. Ruby Jerins as the little girl bullied at school who idolizes her big brother, her hero. Emilie deRavin as Ally, street smart, a little audacious and the perfect match for Tyler. I enjoyed Aidan. But for me Rob Pattinson's performance was the heart of the film. You had to fall in love with him for the film to work. You had to empathize and understand his emotional state in order to feel his loss at the end. And he delivered. You could see every emotion on his expressive face. You could hear it in his voice. He had me the minute he fell through the window to answer the phone, but it was his relationship with his sister that sealed the deal. I have defended this movie on every negative review I have read because it seems to me so obvious that any negative reviewer completely missed the point. I was happy that Roger Ebert, my favorite reviewer got it. The ending was absolutely essential to the film. For me Remember Me was about remembering every son, brother, lover, and friend that parished in 9/11. It was a movie that needed to be made and I believe it was handled extremely well. It is a loss for people who don't go to see it. This movie was a gem.
And to those who are angry and feel as though they've been sucker punched by this, I do understand where you're coming from. I too was profoundly affected by this event on a personal level. But at some point, me must face this and we haven't yet. Generations past have faced their tragedies and so must we. I'll conceed this, with being less than ten years removed from this tragedy, perhaps it's a tad too soon for a film like this. Maybe. But I think the point is, this was not meant to be an exercise in explotation. No one set out to do a 'gotcha' on the audience. Yes, this was not a fiction. Yes, people died. Yes, we are still in tremendous pain over it. But at some point, we must face it. And I'll also conceed this. Perhaps they should have given a heads up as to what was coming, to give people the choice of whether or not to see it. If a mistake was made here, it was that. But I do think that once people's initial reactions have calmed down and if they take a second look, they'll see what the filmakers intent was all along. And it was a good and honorable intent.
I saw Remember Me, and I got it. I really liked the movie. I went to see it without knowing how it would end. I did know it took place in 2001, and was kind of reluctant that it would end the way it did. But to me it worked, it was one more piece on dealing with loss and moving on, and learning from the people that had passed through your life. And yes, by the end of the movie I did get all the implication of the title, it wasn’t just Tyler remembering his brother or Allie remembering her mother, it was more than that, it was also remember what happen on Sept. 11 2001 and all that we lost that day.
But I also get why some people hated it. I recommend it to my friends and so far the one that went to see it hated it. And as I was reading this interview I notice how some of her comments matched to what is mentioned in the interview about feeling cheated and been angry after seen the movie. I liked the movie so much I felt I had to defend it, I had to make my friend see what I saw in it, even though I knew a lot of people like her hated it and felt very angry after seen the movie. Plus knowing that I wouldn’t change her mind, but I had to at least try to make her see what I saw on it that she didn’t.
From what I've read, because I read every review I could find about it after I saw the movie, it's either you like it or you hate it, there is no middle ground. And I wish more people would like it, because it is a beautifully made movie that deals with family and loss, is not just another romantic movie is more than that.
Just another shout out to WILL:
Thank you.
Truly, thank you.
When my daughter is just a little older I want her to see this movie. I was pregnant with her that summer, and when she is old enough, I think seeing your beautiful movie will give her a real sense of what happened, rather than a dry lecture in her history class. It will make it personal.
as it should be.
So thank you again very very much.
Im taking my 94 year old granny to see it tommorrow, she's sharp as a tack… and I would bet 50 bucks that she will feel the exact same way I do! Course I might have to explain to her some of the weed stuff lol… but seriously? This movie is a gem.
Thanks Brad for this great interview. Thanks Will Fetters for a wonderful screenplay, and thanks to Remember Me crew, especially Robert Pattinson for a meaningful, tastful and beautiful movie. I watched this movie on Friday by myself thinking this was a sweet love movie. I was totaly suprised. I took my husband to watch this movie again on Saturday. He is usually very critical but he enjoys Remember Me as much as I do. Dear Will, please don't be discouraged by the bad critics. My heart is broken by reading those movie reviews trashing the movie I love dearly. I can imagine what is your feeling. You should be comforted that many audience understand you. Buth my husband and I got it, especially the ending. I can not think any better way to end the movie with more powerful message. This movie didn't give me a happy weekend, but it urdged me to find a way to mend my life in order to make every day of my life worthwhile. For this, I thank you and the crew again. I hope you and Allen can do some TV interview to reach out to more audience.
wow 64 comments already, is it the undying love for pattison ? or is this movie really worth talking about ? btw i didnt read the whole piece, running late for class.
Perhaps a bit of both ddurden33. There is definitely undying love for Rob Pattinson, but I think primarily this movie is really worth talking about and more than that worth seeing.
ddurden33…Yes, this movie is really worth talking about. If you haven't seen it, please go see it. It's about people dealing with grief (the Hawkins family, the Craig father and daughter). Along the way there is a mixture of laughter, romance with tender love scenes, and endearing moments. It reminds us to truly live in the moment, not taking anything for granted. It honors not only those individuals who were lost on 9/11/01, but any individual who has died a sudden, unexpected death (i.e., my sister left home one day at the age of 19 and never came home–a car accident). "Remember Me" is an appropriate title for the movie. Kudos to Will, Allen and Rob for the strength to make this movie.
@ellen, i do wanna take your word on it, but there are extremely contrasting reviews on this movie, brad sort of liked it, but it got panned by both rottentomatoes and imdb, i take their opinion with a grain of salt but -27% at RT, and 5.8 imdb are a bit too steep dont you think ? so many people missed the point ?
dddurden33:
If some of the professional reviewers didn't get it, obviously real people got the point–this particular review site is only one such example. If you don't want to see it, I can't and won't try to talk you into it, but you'd be missing a very good movie.
The movie is very much worth seeing. Pattinson adds to it of course, but the entire cast and the story is wonderful. It reminds me of a modern day Ordinary People.
I agree with the statement "people just don't get it". And they don't. I think that I had seen a comment from someone on youtube for the trailer it having to do somehow with 9/11, and when going into see it I had kind of forgotten about that. I sometimes pay attention to detail, and noticed that it first started in the year 1991, and then brought us forward 10 years, which made it 2001 and it was set in NYC, so I thought at that moment about that comment I had read. Except that I got pulled into the story, I had forgotten about again until the end at the moment he walked to the window, and really took me by surprise and literally broke down and cried, remembered what it felt like to see those towers again. So yes, I knew it was about 9/11, but it was also about those characters and their emotions and their lives before not knowing what each day brings. Any movie that can make me laugh or cry is alright with me. Did it make me angry? Certainly not. Remarkable film. Thanks Will and Allen.
After reading a lot of negative critic reviews, I decided to see the film anyway. There was so much fuss about the ending I wanted to see for myself. I didn't know what to expect. I was totally blown away by the film and I can't get it out of my head.
Why? Because My sister, a childhood friend and I had an apt. in Brooklyn around that time and we all worked in Manhattan. Watching Tyler and Aidan's Apt I felt transported. The streets of NY and Manhattan felt so Real. The story felt so real to me. I was totally engrossed in the characters. I loved watching the changes in Tyler as he interacts with each charater. How different he is with each one of them. I can relate to that. His relationship with his little sister is just beautiful to watch. Love that just beneath the surface anger toward his father but still wants his attention. Robert Pattinson is a revelation in this movie. You can read every emotion on his face. The entire cast was amazing to me.
The part that hit me in the gut was Ally standing at the train Station and finally getting on a train for the first time since her mother's murder. Why you ask? Because on Sept 11 My sister was on Tower 5. She barely made it out, but we didn't know that as we could not get in contact with her. Days later we got a call that she was at a makeshift Hospital. Needless to say we were overjoyed. But She was so traumatized she could not bring herself to go into Manhattan for a long time. But one day she got up and took the train into Manhattan. That was the beginning of healing for her and I felt watching the film Ally hadn't fully healed until that moment. I would like to Thank everyone associated with the film for this beautiful experience.
I went to see the film as a date night with my husband. One of the traditions of my moving going family is to sit though all the credits at the end. When the film was over I was most interested in the screenwriter of the film and wanted to know more about the him.
I knew of the ending before we went into the film and was intrigued at who was going to parish. My husband caught more of the subtleties with the script than I did. To me it is a film to see again because of the subtleties. Also, after seeing interviews of the actors in the film my curiosity was peeked when Pattinson compared the film to Ordinary People and Terms of Endearment.
I watched this movie on Friday afternoon with a friend. It was not a sold out theatre but there were plenty of people there to watch the movie. Here are a couple of observations:
1) There was an idiot in our theatre who would let out a tremendous loud laugh at certain points of the film, at the very beginning of the film, when Robert Pattinson first shows up on the screen, at the beginning of the argument with Tyler and his father and as they pan out of the window at the World Trade Center where Tyler is located. At this point a woman in the row in front of us yelled at the idiot and told him what was his problem, the man was alone, got up and walked to the side of the theater and stayed there until the credits ended. What a moran.
2)My friend was oblivious about the ending because she thought Tyler commited suicide, so if you were not paying attention to signs along the way, you missed that it was about 9/11.
3)The ending IMO was done tastefully. However, I knew it was coming because of those cynical critics who did not appreciate the film ruined it for us by stating the ending. However, it did not lessen the sadness and numbness I felt when the scene arrived.
4)Most critics who have a problem with the film find two flaws; Robert Pattinson's brooding James Dean impersonation and the ending. Robert did an exceptional job in this film and this is coming from someone who thought his acting in New Moon was awful. I never once felt he was Edward Cullen and he never reminded me of James Dean. As I stated before the ending was done tastefully.
Thank you Will Fetters and Brad Brevet for your interview and insight into this movie. In the future I can assure you this film will be revered, as history shows us Art is truly appreciated years after we are gone and future generations look back and wonder why art in any form was panned when it is first shown to the general public.
I too am dumbfounded at the backlash. I bought my tickets online as soon as the theaters in NYC were announced for the Thursday midnight show. Went with a few friends (mind you we are all big fans of Rob and Kristen) and surprised there wasn't much of a line at 10:30. The theater was about 2/3 full, handful of guys. From the opening scene of seeing Tyler climb through the window I was hooked. I had been warned by a film critic on line the beginning was slow but not necessarily bad, so maybe that helped. I had also read the original script and new the ending. I thought all of the acting was great, Rob blew me away, couldn't take my eyes off of him. I think he played Tyler perfectly, and think he will continue to improve as he tackles more projects. So even though I knew the ending, I ending up crying like a baby. Born and raised in NY and NJ, I have close ties to the city. While I didn't know anyone personally, I know at least 30 people who had loved ones who perished in 9/11. I remember what I was wearing when i looked to the TV before heading out for work and knowing our world had changed. Even though I cried, it was a combination of the memories of that day as well as my despair over losing Tyler and the potential he had for a great life. To me, this film should be APPLAUDED for being the swift kick in the butt it seems we need to remind ourselves to treat each other with respect, to love our loved ones and ourselves as if there is no tomorrow. Life IS short, and it's not a guarantee. The next day I bit the bullet and ran 5 miles because I was sick and tired of feeling sick and tired. This movie gave me that jolt. So how dare people say it was exploitative.
I wish I could read this but no… I'll have to wait a couple of weeks to see this movie. I guess I'll have an interesting article an comments waiting for me.
I thought this was a beautiful film. I've seen it twice over the last week, and will probably go and see it again this weekend.
It was one of the most powerful films I've ever seen. Several comments I've read have called it "haunting", and I would agree with that – the film stays in your mind for days afterwards. It's like you let this fictional character into your heart and end up really grieving for him.
Normally I don't like films with sad endings like this. I was glad that I was spoiled to the extent that I knew that it was a tear jerker and that it was set in 2001. I suspected that it might have something to do with September 11, but didn't know for sure, or which character would be affected. I'm sure I would have enjoyed it much less if I had expected a happy ending. I remember feeling angry and cheated with the ending of films like Sommersby, Nights in Rodanthe and Message In A Bottle.
As for using September 11, I thought it was done very sensitively. The film makes me feel so sad for people who really lost someone in the tragedy.
Mr. Fetters, the script and the movie were brilliant!
This film really affected me. I may have came out crying once I left the theater, BUT I believe this movie is a piece of art. I hate the critics…..they have no heart at all, and saying that the ending is disrespectful is wrong. Remember Me had an ending that's treated with the up most respect. The ending may be shocking, even though there's countless signs 9/11 is approaching. Though, that's life. Things happen, and that's why we learn to "Live In The Moments", because we truly don't know when we will be gone. Thank you so much for bringing this film to life. I think you did a wonderful job on the screenplay, and you should be proud of yourself. I have a feeling with time this movie will get the recognition it truly deserves. I hope you know that many of us are in love with this film. I personally, have never been moved so much when watching a movie. The message of this film will stay with me forever. Thank you so much for creating my favorite movie of all time! Yes, I said it…..Remember Me is now my favorite movie, and will remain so until somehow another movie manages to create something as epic as this…which I doubt.
I loved this interview and I loved the movie!
I got it. It was't that difficult to get! I feel the people that are so negative about this movie walked in knowing they were going to be negative. They want to type cast Rob and 'prove' he isn't as good as he actually is.
I understand all the emotions with 9/11 and this movie made it raw for me as if it had just happened, I felt I was punched in the stomach for HOURS after walking out the theatre. It was a horrible feeling but this is what I loved about it, the emotion was real and for a simple 'movie' to recreate that feeling in me, well it did it's job.
A big massive 'well done' from me to everyone involved. I am trying to get as many people I know to see this at the theatres, it deserves an oscar as far as I am concerned!!
I might actually see it now.
I really hope you do.. it's WORTH IT!
Nick you will enjoy it. I feel the marketing was flawed and made this look to much like a chick flick. My husband and son saw it and they both enjoyed it. My husband said the trailers were not appealing to him but the movie was well worth the watch.
As someone who read the leaked script online, I was more than impressed with this film, even with the changes that were made. The original script is brilliant and even though I wished they had not changed a single thing from it, I understand why they made the changes they did and the movie works very well with them.
The casting could not have been better. Ruby Jerins as Caroline and Tate Ellington as Aidan were wonderful and darn near stole the movie from Pattinson and Brosnan. For those who are only familiar with Pattinson's work in the Twilight Saga movies, you are missing out on one hell of a performance if you do not see him in Remember Me. Not only does he showed that he has great range as Tyler Hawkins, but that he has the potential to give us other breathtaking performances in the future.
Coulter direction and guidance is just as amazing. He handled the ending very delicately and gave us a wonderful film.
If you do not see this film, you are missing out!
I have seen the movie and loved it! I hope they read this and know the movie going public got it, and loved it!!! Robert was fantastic in this movie. The story was great – I saw it Friday and it is still with me. i am going to see it again this week. Great job to all involved. i am very sad that some critics were overly harsh on this movie and that might stop some from seeing it. GO SEE IT. 5 out of 5 stars from my family!
After reading some of the critics reviews of the film and then this interview, I started thinking about film in general and this beautifully done drama in particular and wondered where filmmaker's disclosure, if you will, needs to begin and end. What about the people who have lost sons or daughters to suicide? Should the filmmakers have disclosed that this film dealt with suicide? What about people who have watched a loved one murdered due to some random act of violence? Should the filmakers have disclosed that there was murder in the movie? Why is 9/11 any different? Is it because of its scope? If so more people have committed suicide and died under violent circumstances in this film than in 9/11. They are all horrific acts that scar people. When we go to the movies, how much is at our own peril? I don't know the answer to this question. I know I was horrified by 9/11 but was not horrified at all by the way this lovely well acted story dealt with it. As others have said, it was respectful and tastefully done without graphic scenes of mayhem and distruction. It helped me remember in an empathetic way something that we should not forget. All involved in the film should be proud of this work. I think it will find its audience it already has a large supportive group of movie goers in its corner.
Very eloquently put ShariG
Thank you, sxpnce. The fact is I loved this movie. It touched me in ways few have over the past couple of years. It actually hurts me to read negative reviews about it. It was such honest, emotional work. Writers, directors, actors, all involved put themselves on the line to bring to the screen an excellent story that means something beyond the drivel of most current films in the theater with a few notable exceptions. I don't understand the criticism.
ShariG…incredibly insightful, and brilliantly said. Thank you!
ShariG, very well stated. Everyone has some sort of trajedy in their life and it may not have been on this massive of scale, and the whole world watching, but there have been worst trajedies. This trajedy affected the US because it happened on our soil, I am uncertain how many people perished during the Pearl Harbor attack, but it is how we deal with it in the aftermath that defines us. This movie in no way IMO was offensive to any of those who lost their lives that terrible day. However, everyone deals with grief and trajedy differently and my heart goes out to those who may feel that this movie's ending was too much for them. I am a big movie enthusiast as I am certain many of you are on this website and know that it is how the movie conveys the trajedy that tells you if it was exploitive or gives a deeper meaning to the storyline. I just do not understand why the critics are so shocked. As others have mentioned on this site, was it because the ending was not written on stone before it happened, is this why there is so much fuss? I live in California and we have so many car accidents, one day your driving to work or school and you may not make it if you are in a involved in a terrible auto accident, we hear it on the news everyday. However,the families who have lost someone in that car accident, they had no idea it may be the last time they would see or speak to someone they love. Life is that way many of us never know the outcome. Sorry for the long reply, I had to get this off my chest.
Very well said. "What about the people who have lost sons or daughters to suicide? Should the filmmakers have disclosed that this film dealt with suicide? What about people who have watched a loved one murdered due to some random act of violence? Should the filmmakers have disclosed that there was murder in the movie? Why is 9/11 any different? Is it because of its scope? If so more people have committed suicide and died under violent circumstances in this film than in 9/11. They are all horrific acts that scar people."
Also, there would have been no movies made about WWI, WWII, the Korean war, or Vietnam. America will mark the 10-year anniversary of 9/11 in only one year. As horrific as that day was, especially for those who lost loved ones, it's time to get past it and move on. Live each day with your loved ones and remember they can be taken from you at a second's notice from any type of death. [before my sister was killed in a car accident at age 19, my family was not very demonstrative at all; since, we never fail to hug and say "I love you" when leaving each other).
This is a very good movie.
I agree, you put it well. Many can relate to this movie, 9/11 affected everyone.
People should see this film for themselves and then they can make their own judgement.
I had a brother, aged 17 died from a stray bullet inside the building (Office and accommodation on the 2nd floor) ready to go to bed. This exemplify the "Live in the Moments" theme ad. Sometimes life is short.
It's a poignant story about families. The acting of the cast is Brilliant. For me, it's also remembering the victims of 9/11. Saw the horror on the screen as it unfolds. Tastefully done. Bold and Daring to the senses!
What a quandrary. Pattinson helped the film get made and ensured a built-in (mostly female) audience. But his participation also alienated many male customers and critics who discount him (and the film) because of his looks and his Twilight association. But maybe "bait" was needed to just get an audience into the theater to see this story and then spread the word.
Is it right for professional critics to discount a movie because the lead actor is good looking and is associated with Twilight? Is it not their job to be objective and fair in their reviews?
Agreed! They obviously did not pay attention to Pattinson's performance in this film. For anyone who thought he was not good enough needs to see him in this film because he is fantastic. The movie is perfectly casted, but Robert really shows his range.
It's all very well to argue that people were shocked on 9/11 – of course they were. But that was real life. This is a movie, they paid hard-earned money for their tickets and don't deserve to be kicked in the gut under false pretences. That's not your decision to make, it's theirs. People are angry because you took their decision away – and worse than that, you've made things worse for people who were already traumatised by the original event by having this sneak up on them. Does it make you happy that people who lost their loved ones in the attacks are now having trouble sleeping because you thought it was a good idea to use 9/11 as a plot device for your movie? Personally I think they're not the only ones who should be having trouble sleeping at night.
Christy, you have every right to your opinion, but no one was kicked in the gut under false pretenses. There was not a disclaimer that said watch out for a 9/11 reference, but the writer did not hide the fact that this was set in 2001 or that the film did not have a happy ending. I haven't actually heard from anyone losing sleep over Remember Me, just people alleging that this film about a fictional family has brought back unhappy memories for other people. Can you direct me to anyone who has actually said they have lost sleep over the 9/11 reference in this fictional story? Many films that end with loss can make us sad or remind us of personal loss. Should every movie have a happy ending? Every Nicholas Sparks movie that ends with people you learn to care about over the course of the film dying tugs on your heart strings and makes you remember your own personal losses or feel empathy for those who have. So why the bitterness towards this small, independent film? On this board and on other websites individuals who have lost loved ones on 9/11 have praised the film and the film makers for the respectful way they have handled the tragedy. With all due respect, it makes me wonder if those who are so vehemently critical of Remember Me might not have some other ax to grind and are just jumping on this bandwagon.
I thought 'Remember Me' was very tastefully done & I really appreciate this interview to hear more from Will & his explanation of the film for those who just don't get it.
You did a great job Will, especially for being so young. The ending of the film does remind me of the feelings/emotions I felt on Sept 11.
If u have not seen this movie yet, I would suggest that u go and see this movie and make your own conclusion about the movie rather than just reading the mixed reviews. For me, I have to thank Summit for bringing back this type of movie to the big screen amidst all the obsession with 3D and computer graphics.
I am so happy to finally read a review and subsequent interview by a critic who "got" the film's message. I had heard about the ending, but I still wanted to see the movie after seeing some of the trailers. I thought it was very well done and now knowing how young you were when you were writing it I understand it even better as my sons are in this age group.
Thank you for a wonderful movie and the excellent choice of director and cast. I look forward to your future endeavors. Good luck.
Valerie – Definitely go see Remember Me. It doesn't matter if you know the ending or are seeing the movie for a second time. It is very thought provoking, that's for sure. I didn't really feel the impact until the second time I saw it. Now, I really can't get it out of my head. Go see it, it is good, very good.
Thank God someone finally got it!! I have seen this movie 4 times and am going back again.Everytime I see it I get something else up from it. I agree with Will while not perfect it was more than I'd bargained for. I came out of there feeling like I had been punched in the gut,that something more had happened than me just sitting in a movie.
Thank you to Will, Allen and especially Robert for taking a chance and doing this. I was truely moved by his performance and only saw Tyler. All of the actors were amazing and having NYC herself play such a huge part was perfect.
Critics have never been a reason I would go to, or stay away from, a movie. They often get it completely wrong in their blatantly one sided attempt at … in it's basest form….., telling people what to do, and what to like.
I knew the ending of the movie before I went, having read an early version of the script. From the moment I finished the story I could not wait to see it on screen. The story evoked such emotion from me just from reading it, it was a story that had to be told.
I will admit I worried that I wouldn't feel the same emotions when I finally saw the movie. One never knows, if the actors, director, editors didn't handle it all just right.. the story would be lost. I am happy to report I felt EVERYTHING. And the tears I shed, not just at the end, were not because of the loss of a now beloved character, but for all the stories that were lost that day.
Often, there are people who do not know how to deal with their true raw emotions. (Critics often fall into this category)And if you are one who can not think of tragedies like this on a larger scale, you can not deal with the sorrow of the lost stories, it makes the event that much more personal.. then you will try and blame, try and shout foul, to the makers, actors, writers, directors of the movie.
Look, no one wants to be reminded of that day.. but the movie, at least for me, wasn't about that day. It was about lives and, again for me, it was about not wasting moments…it was about so many things… so many stories, so many wasted moments…
I walked away from my first viewing of that movie absolutely changed. I am not the only one.
If Mr. Fetters is reading these comments I urge you.. please… read from the fans… read their blogs,their accounts, their reaction… I know you have a lot to read.. but these are the opinions you should be concerned with.. not those who make a living trying to convince people what is and is not acceptable entertainment.
If I may, I would like to just show you one quote from a blog. This was taken from the reaction of a 16 yr old boy, about your story….
"Took my 16 year old son to see Remember Me yesterday. It was his 16th birthday. I was a little worried — kinda heavy for a birthday.
When it was over, through my tears, I was surprised (and PROUD) to see that he was opening crying. So was his girl. We all shared a "group hug". That bought on a new batch of tears. We sat there for a little longer as the theater emptied. Once composed, he said to me. "Mom, seriously, that was the best movie I have ever seen." He said, "granted, I haven't seen a ton of movies, but that movie was great."
The whole ride home the film was discussed. Questions asked. He stated that EVERYONE should see this movie. He said the world would be nicer if everyone did. He also said things like. "I need to spend more time with V" (his brother) causing more proud tears to trickle down my face. He went on to say, "Mom, this movie changed me".
Hey, Mr. Fetters and Mr. Coulter, what more could film-makers ask for?"
Seriously.. what more could anyone ask for from a movie?
Thank you for telling this story… it needed to be told.
(My apologies for the long comment)
Thank you for this interview. I think the fact this movie stirs such emotions and hot debate-that is a compliment. Your script and the movie was wonderful. I have not felt that emotional at a movie in a very long time. I thought all of the acting was great- and enjoyed seeing the many facets of Tyler- and it's nice to see that some of him was based on personal experiences. I thought Robert Pattinson played the character so well-his scenes with Ruby Jerins were so touching. I have two sons and have watched them go through a phase of trying to find where you fit in life, your direction at 20 something. If I am still thinking about a movie the next day I consider it usually to be a great movie- I have been thinking about this one for the entire week. Thank you so much for this work!
Great article. I have two comments. First,any film with
the events of 9/11 as part of the story line is going to be
heavily scrutinized.
Second, I really liked the movie. It was a tough ending,though, especially after becoming attached to the characters who had already been through so much. But I get the message of film. And I think it was well worth telling.
I saw this movie with low expectations (despite being a Rob Pattinson fan) and I was really genuinely shocked by how much I was affected by it. The ending was alluded to throughout the movie and the year was restated and mentioned in several scenes so in some ways i saw it coming. Despite that it still really touched me. As is noted in the article the events of that day were unforseen and affected so many and this movie exemplifies that 'live in the moment' attitude we should all be adopting. I think critics are still unsure how to handle movies that portray 9/11 and the appropriate reaction to have. Rob, Pierce, Emilie, Chris and Ruby gave solid performances and i for one left the theater affected and touched. Just a pity others haven't decided to give it a chance, it is definitely worth it.
My fiancee and I went on Sunday. I'll admit, I went strictly because I'm a Pattinson fan. My guy went because I told him we were going (Heh.) I hate movies that try to rip my heart out at the end, so I confess, I did slip out of the theater when Tyler went to his dad's office, My date stayed till the end and was blown away. He loved it. He was so moved he couldn't talk about it the rest of the night without choking up. I know he's told his buddies not to assume this is just a "chick flick" with the Twilight guy. Even without seeing the end – just knowing about it is hard enough for me – I enjoyed the movie as a poignant slice of life. And… well… Rob WAS stunning. :)
GREAT MOVIE, sad ending, but i understood it. It couldnt have been done any better. There was so many different point of views with the 9/11 event. This was just one of them. Mr. Fetter – keep your head up and dont worry about the nasty critics- good interview!
Awaiting your next upcoming films.
Thank you for this article and for letting us get to know the screenwriter a little more. Just saw the film last night and went in without reading any spoilers (hard to do!). The ending had a huge impact on me. Being from the West Coast, and not knowing anyone from the East Coast, I lived the 9/11 attacks in a somewhat abstract way (and I was 22 when it happened, too). Having only seen news coverage of the event, this film really helped show me the personal side. I simply can not get the image of Tyler standing in the window out of my head. I'm not sure why the critics are so against it – perhaps it made them really think and feel about something that is so painful and still somewhat fresh. I think the movie was brilliant and the ending was handled beautifully.
I just got home from my third viewing. As a Rob fan (and i had read the script earlier) i was just overwhelmed the first time. The second one was when i really 'saw' the movie. Then this one? i actually cried more. like others have said, each time i watch it i see more.
The concept that people are angry over the ending baffles me. I can understand feeling upset but I usually don't like spoilers…i want to go in fresh. same with books or TV shows. Often times I witness violence or abuse or uncomfortable settings that I wish i hadn't seen but it's part of the experience. If a viewer is that sensitive then all they have to do is look it up online and they can find any information they need.
I also think the fact it is controversial and provokes different emotions is a sign of a job well done.
well done
On 9-11, I lived in NY and was the age of these characters, and I could definitely relate to the story.
Coming out of the theatre, the most profound thing about the movie was that it conveyed that sense of beauty and optimism the morning of 9-11… before the planes hit.
Unless you were there that day, you would have no idea what a glorious New York morning it was, perfect temperature and blue skies, giving people a sense of inspiration as they started their days….just like the characters were inspired and hopeful after working through their personal struggles. It felt like 'life is good' that day, then everything changed.
Will Fetters and everyone involved in the movie, thank you for this. I doubt that another film will ever be able to capture that part of 9-11.
I saw this moive yesterday (March 16) and i did not know about the ending. People had told be there was a "twist" ending but nothing more. Now to be perfectly honest I did have family in The World trade and many of my close friends did too. But I can truly say that the Ending did not make me mad and I did not feel cheated or offented. I though story was telling you that would should not live life angrey and hateful. To live life to he fullest everyday. I think the way the story pulled you into a everyday life and show how this day affect the avarage persons life and not just the heroes that we lost that day and their families. We grow to love the people in this story and i think thats the perpose. No one knew what was going to happen that day and it showed that just like how it was in the moive.
I absolutely loved the movie and everything about it. It was real, it made me think, it made me feel for each person who lost a loved one that day, and it made me think about my own self and how I would deal with that kind of loss.(Murder of a parent or suicide of a brother) Would I become bitter or let the world swallow me up or would I rise up and conquer?
Every actor did an amazing job and my opinion is that this movie deserves an Oscar!!!! I am so impressed and very thankful that I got to see it.
I'm a huge fan of Robert and went to see this on opening day. I had read the script months before online and was REALLY anticipating the movie after that. Like most film adaptations, it didn't live up to the writing. I completely believe what Will Fetters was saying up there about what his intentions were with the film. I read the script that he wrote, and it was truly about Tyler's therapeutic process after tragedy. But the movie didn't live up to that :( The movie was a little rushed and wasn't as meaningful as the script was. And they changed a lot of things from the script that I don't understand why they were changed. I loved Will Fetters script and story line. I give the movie a good review but I don't think Fetters is at fault for the confusion around the lesson of the story.
Dear Mr. Fetters,
I went and saw the film this weekend having barely any knowledge of what the story consisted of. I was expecting a character study of a young man who was troubled, though by what I was unsure. I had a sneaky suspicion that it was not going to end well, though.
Easily I began to sink into the characters. When Tyler was on his bike and waiting to meet his father at the office, smiling as they spoke on the telephone, I was feeling relief that everything seemed to be taking a turn for the better within their family dynamics. I genuinely cared for this young man. I still had the same nagging suspicion.
When the secretary commented on how beautiful the weather was, my heart leapt into my throat. My suspicions were confirmed, it was not going to end well.
Mr. Fetters, I LOVED your film. My husband once said to me that the sign of a good movie is when you genuinely care about the character(s). Well, you and Robert Pattinson made me care about Tyler. I sobbed through the remainder of the film. I can't get those characters out of my mind, and I saw the movie 4 days ago. I would absolutely see your movie again and I have every intention of purchasing the DVD when it comes out.
I am not a New Yorker, in fact, I was born and raised (and still live) in Philadelphia. However, I remember exactly where I was and how I felt on September 11, and for weeks that followed. I still cry when I hear our "Star Spangled Banner." I do not believe that you did anyone a disservice by writing the ending that you did. I did not find it offensive in any way. I found it to be touching, sensitive, and accurate.
I hope you get to read the wonderful comments that the true fans of your film have written for you. And I hope that word of mouth generates tremendous sales for you and proves all the nay-sayers wrong! Besides, I remember reading that a well-known critic gave "The Lion King" a bad review! (What do they really know anyway?!?)
Thank you for your heart and your story!
Rajna
Well said-I agree wholeheartedly!
I've seen this movie twice already.. planning on a third time this weekend. I love everything about this movie–the actors' ability to portray these characters perfectly, the little hints of comic relief from Aiden here and there, the message of "carpe diem", the connection felt with the characters, the inclusion of love and loss, and the way the ending was portrayed respectfully. I did not read anything about this movie before I saw it, thankfully. I think that not knowing about the "twist" ending, you get the feel for the real message. I was blown away by Robert Pattinson's performance especially, although I do love the Twilight Saga, it does not do him justice. I've been spreading the word to everyone I know to disregard the bad reviews from critics who haven't given Remember Me a chance! I haven't seen a film in so long that impacted me as much as this film! One of my new favorite movies. Yes, it is sad, but the message is so powerful and something I feel like everyone should experience. Definately not offensive in any way!
I was engaged from start to finish. I loved this movie. I am sad most of the critics did not "get it". I will see it again, probably a few times and of course I will buy the DVD. I thought it was extremely well done and well acted. Great directing, great story. I was on the runway of the San Francsico Airport when 9/11 happened and they turned us around and took us back to the terminal. Even the pilot and crew did not know what was happening. It had a huge impact on me and I think the ending of Remember Me was so well done. I certainly was crying and so were my two daughters.
i read Will's screen play and i liked his idea better Ty's brother dying in 93 trade center bombing and then the twist of 9:11 i didnt feel angry or cheated i felt heart broken when ty passed away in a similar way to his brother i have not seen the movie or read the revamped screen play but i was disappointed to here that Miss Lumet changed the death of ty's brother to suicide .
While I loved the movie and felt that the script changes worked, I too wanted to see the original script on screen. When I read Fetters script online, I wept harder than I ever have before. The story stayed with me for days just as the film has. I'm not sure for the reason for the changes, but it would have worked leaving the script in it's true form. I'll be seeing this wonderful film again this weekend and have been telling anyone who will listen (and even a few who won't…lol) that they need to/have to see this film
This is a fantastic interview. I'm so glad that there are people out there that really GET IT. I have been trying to convince a friend to go see this movie, but without spoiling the ending, I don't know what more I can say.
Thank to Will for giving the interview and to Brad for spreading the word.
I saw the movie and enjoyed it very much. The cast should be congratulated for a great job!
I think that the biggest problem this film faced was that to some extent people had expected it to be a romantic film, and whilst there is romance in it, that's NOT what this film is about. I didn't know at all what this film was about and I must admit that my biggest drawcard was Robert Pattinson. Since seeing him in Harry Potter, I would watch him in anything…and yes I have seen The Haunted Airman and think his acting is great in that even if the film isn't. I was affected deeply by Remember Me and felt that the message was about the frailty of life and the importance of telling loved one's you love them whilst you have the chance 'cause you never know what will happen… I watched it twice in two days and can't wait for the dvd. A powerful touching film made with sensitivity and empathy.
I was so glad to see this interview. I so wanted to somehow contact Will Fetters after I got home from seeing the movie on Friday, to tell him how much I loved it, even though I was so sad that I couldn't shake it for two days afterward. It really just stayed with me so much. As both a New Yorker and a writer, I thought he wrote a beautiful little gem of a movie. I think the 9/11 subject is just still taboo to a lot of people, because they remember it so well and it still hurts. I was here, I knew someone who died in the Towers, and I wasn't angry at the movie. I think that he and the director handled the ending (not showing, but implying) tastefully and respectfully, and got the emotions right. The way everyone just looked UP in total horror… that's one of the main images I sure remember from that day. Everyone in the cast was great, and Robert Pattinson really showed he's got some chops after all, but none of that could've happened without a strong script. It's all about the writing, folks. And this was your first screenplay, Will? Damn. I look forward to your future work. Don't listen to those who "didn't get it"; plenty did, just look at all these heartfelt comments above mine. I think this movie accomplished what you originally intended: putting a face on this tragedy, that all these people left home that morning not knowing what was about to hit, that 3,000 people died with unfinished business and leaving heartbreak behind them. For the younger generation, people who were too young to be aware of what happened then but know about it now, maybe bringing such a monumental catastrophe down to such an intimate, personal level will help them connect and understand that day in a way they couldn't before. I truly think that the movie's shelf life, long after it leaves the theaters, will prove to be much brighter and stronger — this movie is a classic. People just don't realize it yet.
So keep it up, Will. Good work. Well done.
As I live in Europe, I have to wait until April te see Remember me but I defenitely will. There are so many positive comments here and on other places and so many people share their memories and emotions of 9/11 thats it's almost creating a bond between those who have seen the film. I think that,if there has been a problem, it probably was the marketing of the film who wasn't perhaps clear enough about the theme and the period in which the story took place. I can imagine someone (still traumatized by the loss of a family member at 9/11)going to the theatre to see a romantic love story and then been confronted with the end… Some can deal with it, others not (yet). But this says nothing about the quality of the movie and is surely not a reason to write bad reviews about it. I've found these reviews very offending towards the filmmakers whose intentions were honest and respectful as proves all these positive comments. I think it is important to communicate your opinions as much as you can and certainly to the magazines and newspapers that gave the negative reviews. I already asked the reviewer of EW (Lisa S…) what she thinks about the disagreement of all those who saw the film and really appreciated it and if she would be able to eventually reconsider her opinion and mention it in an article, but she didn't answer me (haha). And I think it's important not to mention fanthings about Twilight and Robert because they will put you in the teenbag and they will not take you seriously. The battle to keep Remember me remembered by a big audience will be a very strategical one lol. I at least am very glad that finally a film touches so many people by the emotions it triggers. And this young man refering to Ordinary People and Tearms of endearment as the motive to get the lead part in this film can rather than making the easy choices can't do any wrong to me. I'll support his career as much as I can. Sorry for the mistakes but English isn't my native language.
Thank you so much for seeking out this interview to get Will Fetters perspective. I thought this movie portrayed real people in real relationships dealing with difficult events. And isn't that what life is about? The 9/11 ending was handled very tastefully and even though I knew it was coming it still clutched at my heart as I remembered all too well the images and emotions of the day. Shocking? Yes but all tragic events are shocking to someone. It's just that 9/11 was shocking to a much larger group of someones. I didn't find it expoitive at all and have been telling everyone I know that this movie is definitely worth seeing.
I liked Robert Pattinson before this movie. A lot of people thought that he couldn't act. But after watching this movie, other people finally realized he has a lot of potential. This movie was amazing and the acting was great. The way they showed the parts leading up to 9/11 gave me chills it was sad and yet beautiful ending because, you know he died happy. People found the end making them angry, and cheated; They shouldn't, it was tragic but well done. I think this is a wonderful movie and shows us to love. Even if you are not a fan of Robert Pattinson, you should still watch Remember Me. It is very well done and has a deep message.
Robert Pattinson has a lot of talent and i know he is going to go far.
I read this interview and that convinced me to go see the film. I was curious to see if RP could actually act and as an exNYer and someone who has dealt with many losses the sensitivity of the screenwriter touched me an prompted me to go. I am glad I knew the spoilers, the randomness of life was even more pronounced watching and knowing. I was pleased with RPs acting tho it would be nice to see him stretch further in future films. I think the screenplay hit home and focusing on the whole film, not just the pretty faces made it much more touching and meaningful. Thanks for the interview.
My sister and I have seen RM twice now, and it gets better with each viewing. This is a movie with depth and soul. Perhaps because we are in Australia we have a little more 'distance' from 9/11 however this doesn't mean that we don't understand the impact that it has had. We felt that the event was treated very respectfully and openly. It did not feel cheap or exploitative in ANY way. I also work in a creative field and to a small degree I can understand how Will Fetters feels when he reads bad reviews, and the frustration he must feel when people don't 'get it'.
I write this on the slim chance that he may read some of these comments, to assure him, that everyone in the cinemas we saw it in got it. I didn't see this movie as a romance, I saw it more as a drama about relationships, many different relationships.
Will Fetters should be very proud of his work, PLEASE do not be discouraged. It is beautiful
Now that I have seen Remember Me, I feel like I can make an acceptable comment. I liked it. A lot. I feel that along with what Brad was saying about "a study of grief" and "bolts from the blue," (definitely from the blue!)that this movie is about choices as well. All of Tyler's choices, as well as the choices made by the supporting characters, have a consequence that affects OTHER PEOPLE. We see the little things, like Tyler's bar fight and his decision to mouth off, his father's decision to go to the office instead of the art show, etc., etc. Then there are the big one's, such as the sad finale. Every action has a consequence. BTW, I really was able to put 2 and 2 together to figure the whole ending out. I think there were hints throughout, and it was SO tastefully done. I think that it's a good movie, hands down. Shame on the other critics who jumped to critique this movie simply because of the ending. They failed to critique the movie as a whole, and isn't that what they're supposed to do?
Wonderful movie and wonderful interview. I now understand why the movie felt so real to me. I connected with the characters and the story in a way that I never have before. I usually am one who only likes moves that have happy endings and would rather disappear into a fantasy life, but I was so impressed with the story, the writing, the acting, the production, everything. It is a shame that more people will not give this movie a chance either because they feel "cheated by a cheap ending" or whatever other reason they may have. I hope that those of you who were able to appreciate the movie will join me in promoting this work of art so that more people can experience it.
This article and interview are really needed right now. Good idea.
The thing is, the comments are stunning. They are, first of all, more objective than most of the reviews out now. They are intelligent, sensitive and sometimes very insightful. But also, they do, much more so than any here, go to profound places and indicate just how very moved they were by seeing this movie. There are ‘stories’ of the different ways in which the film touched their lives in meaningful ways, and the dialogues are examples of just how positive this kind of communication can be. Will, Rob and Allen need to know that this movie has changed lives, that it is so meaningful people cannot get it out of their heads, or stop talking about it, in positive ways. This is a remarkable achievement!
This movie is a tour de force, it really is.
I agree completely Danielle!
I've really been moved and struck by the depth of emotion in these comments. I hope people have a chance to, not only read this interview and the comments that follow it(please re-post it in other places), but also GO SEE THE MOVIE!! And not be swayed by the critics who clearly don't have a clue…
People are tired of the same formulaic stories – they want to see a movie that touches them. "Remember Me" clearly did that for so many people and should be celebrated.
Gotta say, I completely agree with this review.
Watched this my with girl last night. We are two Australians living in Perth, and I was 12 years old and remember when the planes crashed it was about 2am, and my mum was crying and mumbling things about another world war, I didn't understand what all the drama was about.
Watching this movie, and only having prior knowledge revealed in the trailer placed myself in a really awesome seat. The story within the movie was extremely engaging, the music and just the way it felt all contributed hugely to that. You could feel it as if that was you, that you were there or if not, that you were relating so deeply to it. Then suddenly, just as things start to come together, it all falls dramatically apart. As soon as "September 11" was written all chalk board, suddenly everything felt taken from beneath me. I finally understood the tragedy that American's felt. For me, as an Australian it is something we have never felt before, it was a truly unique and eye opening experience and I was absolutely grateful for being able to go through that so vividly. You could tell everyone was affected in our cinema, as no one left for quite a while, we were all just struck, sunken into or seats sobbing. As if we lost someone. It was truly priceless.
Thanks for the great movie, and I am definitely doing all I can to recommend it to friends. Good luck in the future. And hope this is a little bit more of a life boat you can hold onto.
Absolutely touched,
- Ben
5) I really enjoyed this movie to me!!! I know people who died in the 9/11 were husbands, wives, friends; brothers; sisters and lovers they were people who left behind loved ones. Who “remembered them” all the time and always will. If anything, this movie reminds us that life can be short and just because you find the person you love, does not mean you will always be with them. It reminded me that the people who died that day are not just numbers, they had loves too. Just as these characters. I'm from South Africa; after watching this movie I was numb and sad, i've been thinking about it since. In fact I'm encouraging everyone to go and see it, i know i'll definitely go and watch it again this weekend.
I told my sister to see it. I warned her about the ending as she was at World Trade on 9/11. She loved it. She said she was expectint the ending to be graphic. Afterward she was like. That's it! That's what got those critics' panties in a bunch? She said it was tastefully done. It was implied as opposed to showing graphicic death scenes. She said the critics just could not wait to "stick it to the guy from Twilight". She said you know how predictable they are. If a young guys is attractice and got success early, Of course he can't act.
I am right there with you Alice! People just want to complain about something.
OK, so I saw this movie 3 times, 1 time free at a screening the day before it opened. Couldn't wait because I love Robert. I paid to see it two more times because I HAD to take my friends to see it. It was an amazing movie! I can't stop thinking about it and telling everyone that I know that they have to see it. I tell them honestly it is not a happy movie, but it has happy parts in the movie. I read the review in Entertainment Weekly and had to write a letter to the magazine because I was so upset with this woman that reviewed the movie. I honestly think that she went into the movie hating it because she thought that she was going to see Robert being Edward….she was so wrong. Robert is Tyler and there isn't any question in my mind. I will buy this movie when it comes out on DVD. The biggest thing that I recall after the second time that I saw it, which was opening night, all of the teenage girls that went to see it because Robert was in it and being totally blown away that these kids were like 3, 4, and 5 when 9/11 happened. This was all new to them. I think that it is very important to always remember 9/11 and to remember how you felt that morning. I know that 9/11 changed my life and I had comraderie with N.Y. after that and I am on the West Coast. Will, Robert, Nick and Allen should all be very proud of this film. People will come around and it will be seen.
I just want to comment on the original script, which I thought was much more powerful than the one used. This is just a shout-out to what I thought was a real work of art. I wish it hadn't been edited, but even so, the movie was beautiful, and I just mentally replaced the edited pieces with the original, and enjoyed it a lot more that way. There were many things I loved about the original, besides the manner of Michael's death. The last five pages were sorrowful and shocking, yes, but the sheer inteliigence of the loop clinched it. Also, I wish the original conversation between Tyler and Ally's father had stayed.
So yeah, Will Fetter's original script was stunning, and I recommend that people read it before they watch the movie. It's like reading a book and then watching an adaptation that's great, but not nearly as great as the book. I wept a lot after I was done with the script, and affected for a long time afterward, but I look at it in a positive manner. Well done, Will Fetters.
I haven't read the original script, but I am glad that they changed the manner of Michael's death. Losing two sons in separate terrorist attacks sounds too contrived to me.
It's four days since I've seen the movie twice, and it's still very much on my mind – very unusual! I will definitely see it again this weekend.
I recall reading the 'leaked version' of Will Fetters script Memoirs. I knew then that this was going to be a film similar to romantic dramas of the 40's and 50's.
This film leaves you thinking and reminds you that not all films are made expressly for entertainment purposes. There is a message put across. I connected with the entire film from the beginning as I come from NY and the film was so real to me as were the relationships portrayed. The 'dysfunction' of the families of the 2 main characters is so grounded in reality that people do need to understand the tagline of 'Live in the Moments"
To Will Fetters, Allen Coulter and Robert Pattinson I say BRAVO for the film, topic and knowing a movie like this needs to be made to remind people how precious life and love truly is.
I went to see Remember Me in initially in support of Robert Pattinson. I've also seen Little Ashes, and How To Be. Two extremely opposite genre of movies and he was really talented in both. Not knowing the initial plot of Remember Me (Summit sold it as a romance), I was leery of this movie. My mother, sister and I watched it together-we were all happily surprised at how good it was. It is a nicely crafted film. I loved Pierce Brosnan and Ruby Jerins, but Tate Ellington who plays Robert Pattinson's best friend's character, Aiden, stole nearly every scene he was in! Robert Pattinson was really good. It is always nice to see him in a movie where he gets to flex his acting skills. This movie had me thinking about the actors and plot days after seeing it. Ignore the critics (except for this site =) and go see the film for yourself.
I saw the movie opening day. I am a fan of Pattinson and even though I was not thrilled by the trailers for the movie, I went anyway to see how he did in a non Twilight movie. I was so moved by his emotional and soulful performance. I thought, in fact, ALL the performance were excellent! And though I did not know the ending, thanks to spoiler reporter Matt Lauer (sigh) I did know it had something to do with 9/11. I used to go to school in Manhatten in the early 90s and remember a poignant event in my life occurring at the top of Tower One. So when the towers crumbled I was in tears for the people and the city I once called home. I did not find this ending exploitative or sensational at all. Once I knew what was going on in the film, I was holding my breath, afraid of how it was going to play out. I felt the filmmakers dealt with it respectfully and a week after seeing it, it is still running through my mind. Even though I'm a fan of Pattinson and was impressed by his work, I am even more proud of him for tackling such a sensitive and controversial subject rather than just sitting on his laurels and choosing a project that would pander more to his teenaged fans. Fetters wrote a loving and touching tribute to the everyday man and family who were subject to the randomness of life and tragedy. I thought the movie was real and beautiful and was glad I saw it.
In the interest of full disclosure, I am a woman who has had the horrifying experience of coming into the world as the youngest of three children, and finding myself, at the age of 40, an only child. I am the character of Caroline in many ways. I lost an older sister and, five years later, as older brother to massive heart failure. The loss that Remember Me deals with is not contrived or fantastical. It is reality for many people. Circumstances are different, but the pain, grief and derailing of life paths is very real. I commend Fetters and everyone involved for daring to explore something that many others are afraid to consider. Tragedy and loss can visit the same place twice. Ask me and I'll tell you how true and uncontrived Remember Me really is. At the end of the film, I didn't feel manipulated at all. I missed my sister and my brother and I was reminded of how lucky I was to have had them in the first place.
Thank you Mr. Fetters.
Amen Hawkeye! Well said!
I saw the movie twice. The 1st time I went alone and the ending was a complete surprise. The 2nd time I went with a friend (not a Rob or Twilight obsessor). It was obvious to me the 9/11 event was not tacked on at the end just to illicit shock or be a tearjerker. The movie portrayed various people living life until their lifes were impacted by this trajic event. It made me think of the circumstance that led Tyler to being the Tower that day and not his father. There were all kinds of real life stories told of circumstance that led people to be in or out of the building that trajic day. It was a great movie, well acted, except for the one boardroom meeting scene between Tyler and his Father with Caroline's drawing. That was a bit overdone :)
I attempted to leave the following reply in response to the NYT review of Remember Me that was written by Manohla Dargis, but my comment wasn't accepted and therefore has not appeared on the page. I then read this interview and decided to post here instead. Many thanks to Brad Brevet for taking the time to write this article and giving us all a place to comment without censorship.
Disbelief
I am continually shocked by the number of people who seem to have completely missed the point of this movie and the reason why those who made it were so compelled to see it through and maintain the integrity of a project they all believed in as worthwhile. Senseless tragedies occur, around the world, every single minute of every day, and the universal truth about them is that the people they impact don't know the tragedy is about to befall them, yet those unexpected moments change their lives, forever. THAT is what this movie was about; it's not a love story, it's not an exploitative shocker, it's not a teen drama; it's a slice of life, a character study, and a frighteningly true-to-life portrayal of characters who are realistic in more ways than I can count. I am an NYU alum, I lived in NYC for many years, I lived close enough to smell the buildings burning for days after 9/11 took place, and I did not know the ending of this movie when I saw it. I related to these characters on a multitude of levels; my life was touched and shaped by loss in my teens, I was damaged and wandering during my angst-filled early 20's, yet I managed to connect with other people, work through my issues, and have an impact on the lives of people I love. This film is not a cliche, it's not an insult to the people who lived through 9/11; it's honest, and it's a respectful homage to the inconceivable, unanticipated horror of that day. All the self-righteous,indignant,critiquing that is going on, focusing on the mistaken impression that 9/11 was invoked as a plot device, is far more offensive and exploitative than anything about the film itself. I lived through this tragedy, I know what I experienced, I remember it all too clearly; the feelings, the sights, the smells, the aftermath. This movie is a tribute, not an insult to the memories of all those who were impacted. It cheapens everyone, from those responsible for this film,to the viewers, to the actual victims of that horrific day to say otherwise. Watch the movie for what it is; not a typical hollywood portrayal of a known tragic event, but the beautifully portrayed story of everyday people who wound up having their lives altered in unimaginable ways. I have nothing but respect for Will Fetters, Allen Coulter, Nick Osborne, Robert Pattinson, Emilie de Ravin, Pierce Brosnan, Chris Cooper and all the other people who were involved in bringing this fictional but hauntingly real tale to the screen; I believe they all knew they were taking a chance by daring to touch upon such an emotional topic, but they all felt it was worth the risk, and I can not thank them enough for having the courage to do so.
Well said, Karen.
Glad we have this place to post uncensored comments. I really, really hope that Will, Allen, Rob, and everyone else who took a chance to make this movie are reading some of these comments — from the VIEWERS, not the professional critics — and are heartened to know they made a movie that has truly and deeply touched people, and not offended them.
Thank you so much for posting Karen. Great comments.
I agree completely. My mother was killed in a random accident when I was growing up and I had close family members on planes (9/11) heading to NYC that were diverted at the last minute. I also had cousins, who worked next to the Towers, that we were not able to locate or talk to for about a week after the event because of all the phone outages and other issues with communications. So during that week, we were re-traumatized just imagining the worst and not knowing whether they were alive or not.
I felt from the beginning that the film did an amazing job of showing what it's like to be changed forever by random and tragic events and how people deal with their grief. Will, Alan, Rob, Nick and everyone connected with this film should be very proud. I hope they know that even if the critics missed the point, entirely, the viewers did not. People who have seen the movie, in general, have loved it. I know that I found it to be very moving and everyone who I have spoken to, who have seen it, felt the same.
Just wanted to amend my post to say that my response has actually been accepted at the NYT review site; I didn’t expect a 2 day turnaround time for a comment on a movie review to be accepted—I guess I’m a bit impatient.
Thanks to those who’ve left positive feedback; very glad I decided to post here as well.
I already made my comment but I am reading each as they are sent to me. I just want to applaud Karen and each of those who wrote a more compelling review than I did. WELL SAID KAREN.
Great article and you need to see this movie more than once. The first time it's too emotional and then as you return and keep watching you see more and hear more. Peolple are healed in this movie, and everyone should be able to idenitfy with being early 20's and how lost and overwhelmiing it is. After seeing this film and you come away hopeful and enjoying how resielient and strong people are. Loved it and will see it again and again. Doesn't hurt that Robert Pattinson rocks….
I just remembered that this movie reminded me of one of my favorite movies of all time, "Life is Beautiful" with Roberto Bernini. That movie also showcases the preciousness of life and family and it also had a tragic, controversial ending. When it came out, it also got a lot of criticism for supposedly using the historical tragedy of the holocaust as film device. But I totally disagree. Hoards of people loved (and still love) this movie and it won an Oscar for best foreign film!
In that movie, and in Remember Me, a well known tragedy was the background to show an "everyman's" story and how historical and life changing tragedies can derail our lives, no matter how mundane or common we may find them. And to embrace the moments and people in life that mean the most to us. At least the character of Tyler Hawkins had found peace and acceptance in his life before it was too late. And that was the message of the film.
I agree with Will. Please read my movie review at: http://www.MovieBlogByDonna.com.
I think Tyler's musician brother committed suicide because he had gone to work for their father who was a big wig in the corporate world. It was a "sell-out." A musician would find it suffocating to work in an office just because he couldn't make money as a musician. His father probably pushed him to come work for him to earn a decent living. I think that's one reason Tyler was so mad at his father – he blamed him for his brother's suicide. Michael probably felt like he'd rather die than succumb to the corporate world.
Hi… i will be seeing RM again tomorrow coz i learned that it is extended here in the Philippines… without much promotion here, RM was still able to extend its showing on a 2nd week… talking about "star power"!!!!
Hi I'm from Singapore and Remember Me just started screening yesterday. I decided to watch it alone since my friends weren't free until another week but I couldn't wait another day!! It was also in the spirit of the film that made me want to do something I never had to guts to which was to go to the ticket counter, buy 1 ticket and sit all by myself. I felt some weird vibes from the crowd but it didn't bother me especially after watching the film.
I loved it. The entire film felt very real, it wasn't some blockbuster movie with big effects and an expensive price tagged onto it. I read the script beforehand, and to be honest it's just not the kind of films that would have typically made it off the shores of USA. If it wasn't for Rob's daring pick and his popularity, it would most probably be some small-time Indie film shown only in some US states.
This is the kind of film where I actually didn't mind the hand-held slightly shaky cameras. Rather, it created a more realistic feel to the film, as if we're literally peeking in on their lives rather than watching it from a distance. The editing though, felt very choppy. Similar to My Sister's Keeper where they switch scenes too quickly before you can get into the emotions the scene is trying to depict. But despite the initial irritation over that, the emotions still got across, and it may also be due to the fact that the story hits close to my heart.
I like the fact that this film was very human. We see the characters doing normal stuff that we typically do, there's no particular stand-out scene that sets the story in motion like most stories. We go through life, face some arguments and problems, and we don't necessarily get some big epiphany out of it in that moment. Yet at the end of it, I realized that every scene that was seemly insignificant is important. This film touched on so many things categorizing it in one genre just doesn't cover it.
All the characters experience something that changes them, and yet all of them chose to handle it in different ways. Tyler chose to blame his dad so that his anger, which was really at his brother, could be fixated on something tangible. Charles chose to distance himself thinking it wouldn't hurt as much when we lose our loved ones. Ally chose to live her life because she knows things can happen for no apparent reason. Ally's dad holds on tightly to the only thing he has got to lose. Life is all about the choices we make; we can choose to feel sorry for ourselves and blame others for our situation, or we can try to make the best out of it.
You don't have to lose someone to the gallows of death to feel the pain. I lost my dad when he became an alcoholic, so I could relate to Tyler and his emotionally-absent father. To have someone in your life but not a part of it. And sometimes, it gets difficult because his daily presence is just a reminder of what you've lost. And even though I understand that the binge drinking was due economic depression that cost him his company, and that the alcohol was to blame for the violence inflicted, it was easier to paint him as the bad guy and be mad at someone/something tangible than to blame life and its circumstances.
And my brother is kind of like Tyler, he blames my parents for the things happening at home. At my dad for the beatings, at my mom for not leaving him, so he sits around at home in front of the computer all day. Not studying, not working, just bumming around because he feels that if he didn't ask to be born they should be responsible for his life and provide for him inconsequentially. And he's been ignoring me for over a year, not talking, not acknowledging my presence. He doesn't even open the door for me when I get home even when I don't have the key and he's the only person in the house. And even until now I have no idea what I did wrong since we weren't that close to begin with.
I used to feel all victimized and I keep blaming people for making me feel this terrible. But lately I'm coming to realize that I am the one who chose to let the pain consume me, cripple me to the extent that I distanced myself from people. I'm in my 3rd year of university and I didn't bother to make any friends, not even with project group mates or lab partners. I stopped going to church, don't have any other activities, I basically closed off most of my social circles to the extreme because it was easier to not let new people into my life with the chaos the old ones are making.
Change doesn't turn on a dime. It takes time, and sometimes, before you realize it you have changed. Like Ally talking about her past at the dinner table with Tyler's dad out of the blue. Before she realized that she has been living her life stuck in that event like her father, just not handling it in the same way, she has actually begun to let go of the past. And Tyler, whose hasn't been out living life since his brother's death, becomes more light and happy, although not completely losing that angst. He slowly grows to be more mature; he becomes more dependable, calling his dad to protect his mom and sister. At the start he chooses not to accept anything from his dad not because he doesn't need it or want it, but just because of the blind anger towards him. But after getting bailed out of jail because of Caroline, he didn't reject it like he would have earlier, instead he is beginning to learn to depend on others. And Charles, after the fight with Tyler and Caroline's incident, he stands up for Tyler's behavior to protect Caroline. And I was glad that the script showed him beginning to make an effort with Caroline before Tyler's death, it wasn't an act of regret but from his heart to try and change.
Even though some people feel that the ending was exploitation, don't all movies on wars, abuse, tragic events exploit that? Maybe its because they feel that the ending was just added to squeeze some tears out of the audience, but I didn't feel that way. It could be the fact that I'm Singaporean, but for me it felt right for the story to end this way. Life is unpredictable, and that was an event no one expected. In truth, if Tyler ended up murdered or got into a car accident, the impact of the story wouldn't be told in its full extent because even though we don't expect bad things to happen in our lives, accidents are expected and very probable. It was like what Tyler thought of Ally's dessert-first theory, "What are the odds?". Like an asteroid hitting earth. And truth is, no one can guarantee what would happen in the next moment, no matter how small the possibility is.
Finally, even if you feel angry about the ending, at least don't forget the beauty of pain depicted in this film. After Ally's mom and Michael's deaths, they were all somehow crippled by the pain. But with Tyler's death, the pain helped them learn to embrace life in its entity. Life isn't perfect. We can only go through it hoping that we have done at least one thing right by the ones we love, minimize the damages we inflict on others and nurse the wounds that people give us, hoping it will heal someday.
I may not be there yet, like I said, change doesn't turn on a dime. But I really am trying to remain hopeful. I think I'm going to give my father another shot. I have been ignoring him for weeks now, and even though we may never get to a relationship I would hope to have, I don't think I would want to remain in this status for the rest of my life.
Very well said…
I love your post. I totally get the part where you say…
"Life isn't perfect. We can only go through it hoping that we have done at least one thing right by the ones we love, minimize the damages we inflict on others and nurse the wounds that people give us, hoping it will heal someday".
Beautifully said.
I admit I went into the movie with the idea that I would be seeing a smart little love story…I left the theater feeling a whirl wind of emotions. I understood the backdrop stuggle between Tyler and his dad, that hit home for me. I felt the pain of a broken family trying to hold the pieces together somehow. Honestly, I cried at the end because it made me tie the tradegy of that day to someone, some real, if only on the big screen. I thought the movie was well acted and if you didn't leave the theater thinking about the jails we are stuck in when we are disconnected from those we need in our lives and the impact a single day can have to someone, then no, you didnt get it…
This film does something no other has done in a very long time: it resonates, and the viewing public isn't used to it. It requires multiple viewings. It sneaks into a lot of people hours later because it takes a long time to process, and then it's a tidal wave. So many people have been affected this way. They say things like: 'I can't stop thinking about it.'
People are blogging up a storm and the comments in spoiler threads are amazing. The film has tapped into a well of thought and feeling so deep, it is stunning in its power. People are moved, touched by the film. They care. That's something most movies can't do these days.
People are telling stories about their lives, their loves and losses and pains, as a result of watching Remember Me. They aren't just talking about the ending. It is of a piece and the power of the film comes from its main theme, which Heather mentions. It is about loss, grief and healing.
Tyler, the central character, is played with power and subtlety by Robert Pattinson. The ending is so huge not just because it brings 9/11 into it, but because by that time we are emotionally invested in Tyler. And we wouldn't be if Robert hadn't done such a great job. If we don't care about Tyler and his death, everything else is irrelevant. So when Tyler stands at that window and realization came to me of what doom was coming to him, the film started haunting me. The musical score was riveting. I was paralyzed, unable to breathe, too hysterical to cry.
Our sorrow is our homage, our respect, our expression of how much we have lost.
We must not forget. We must not forget the Holocaust. We must not forget 9/11. We must not forget that one particular life that was taken from us. We must not forget that one life.
It speaks to the enormous power of this film that it could unleash such a deep and primal well of feelings in so many of us. It is a remarkable result of a remarkable movie.
I see the film's treatment of the event as homage, tastefully and eloquently done.
So when Tyler looks out that window and the camera zooms out so that there will be no mistake as to his fate, all I can think is that I want him back. It's f–king heartbreaking.
There is so much more. These filmmakers are to be applauded. Ignorant and arrogant reviewers, who have eyes but cannot see, ears but cannot hear, say rotten tomatoes. I say Oscars. So there.
I agree with you, on every point.
You stated it eloquently, clearly — thank you.
The comment threads on this have indeed been incredible — mindblowing in their earnestness, the depth of feeling, the outpouring of emotion.
I so, so wish (hope) that Will Fetters, Allen Coulter, Robert Pattinson, and everyone else involved in the making of this movie were reading these comments. I hope they know that they have genuinely touched many people. The critics — to go back to the original point of this interviewer — just didn't get it. But it seems many people DID. I just hope they know that.
Well said Jessegirl. I think the negative critics made up their minds before seeing the movie.
Sorry, can't help it. A bit more to say. Please indulge. Will Fetters, Robert Pattinson and Allen Coulter need to know what the heck is going on.
A poster somewhere said that: "In order for the entire movie to work you had to fall in love a little bit with Tyler." Yes, he's the linchpin, the glue, and without him the center will not hold. That's why we know Robert's portrayal worked. We love the guy by the end and it breaks our hearts, as if it were our own son or lover who died that day, when we know what's coming.
We lost Tyler, screaming inside, which is why we sat, stunned. The loss ripped our being. Later we started thinking about other losses in our lives. Remembering those others. Honouring them. Tyler is the key, the touchstone to all that. 'Remember me', all dying people plead. 'I was alive. I loved you.' Remember, remember.
Someone talked about the vitriolic words the bad reviewers used–because, face it, they are eaten up with envy for Robert–but there are many better words for this film.
Use these words: haunting, resonant, brilliant, powerful, real, moving, profound, tasteful, healing, sensitive, substantive, significant, thought-provoking, poignant, gut-wrenching, up-lifting. That's just the beginning of a list.
This film is a tour de force. From the acting, directing, screenplay, score, cinematography, concept. It quietly takes your breath away.
Well, said~ You had me crying by the end of your comments. I hope that Robert, Allen, Will and Nick all get to read these comments. I took my father to see this movie and he loved it too. He and I continued talking about it as we left the movie. Thank you for putting into words what some people cannot and for reviewing it truly for what the movie was!!!!
This comment is for Will Fetters: if you ever wants to sit down with me I will love to let you know how profoundly moving this movie was for me. Coming out of a serious depression, to me it was seeing how aggression whether from the outside or inside can be so incredibly destructive.
The Gandhi Quote in the move really hit me hard. What you do is insignificant but you still have to do it. Every time we do what we are meant to do-live our lives in the best way possible-then all the people who died that day would not die in vain…
For me, this movie was about hope, redemption and the perseverance of love in the face of aggression and violence (internal & external). This also may seem cliche- but that doesn't bother me and don't let it bother you. I LOVED THIS MOVIE and look forward to watching/listening to more of your comments when the DVD comes out…
Thank your for bringing me back to my self again even if it may only be for a moment -this movie was what you were meant to do regardless of whatever significance people are giving it…
I asked my husband to take me to the movie for birthday because we are acquainted (our only child died 7 years ago) with grief and have been grief support groups for 3 years. I did not know about the 9/11 connection but thought the actual ending—Ally riding on the subway again with a slight smile—was perfect. There is hope after loss and sometimes there is hope in loss. The hope of a life that is worth hoping for again.
I have questioned if I would be able to recommend this movie as I know many would not get it. But that is the mantra of the grieving, "they just don't get it."
I am sorry to say that there were on 4 other people in the theater with us as there are lessons to be learned—if you can get past the filthy apartment!!! And I love Caroline. Would see it again just to see her.
Should have proofread my post. If you can, please remove!
I asked my husband to take me to the movie for my birthday because we are acquainted with grief (our only child died 7 years ago) and have led grief support groups for 3 years. I did not know about the 9/11 connection but thought the actual ending—Ally riding on the subway again with a slight smile—was perfect. There is hope after loss and sometimes there is hope in loss. The hope of a life that is worth hoping for again.
I have questioned if I would be able to recommend this movie as I know many would not get it. But that is the mantra of the grieving, "they just don't get it."
I am sorry to say that there were only 4 other people in the theater with us as there are lessons to be learned—if you can get past the filthy apartment!!! And I love Caroline. Would see it again just to see her.
I will think about this movie for a long time and get the DVD.
It saddens me to see that such a beautiful, tender movie about love, loss and grief, and coming of age can be surpassed at the box office by the likes of "She's out of my league" and the "Bounty Hunter".
I would love to know what the Summit Marketing department was thinking when they promoted this film. As previous posts have mentioned, they did not do it justice.
It really pissed me off that the tv interviewers (the View/the Today show etc) asked more about Twilight Saga and Rob's rise to fame, than what this film was about. And the same goes for that Lisa woman on the EW.com site. I don't think she could have actually seen this film and come up with that idiotic critique.
I confess I went to see Robert Pattinson and had actually misunderstood what I had read about the role of 9/11 in this film. I thought is brother had died in 9/11.
All that to say, I was so taken by the story and the great acting, that I didn't care about Robert Pattinson. I cared about Tyler Hawkins.
I would also like to note that I thought Emilie de Ravin was excellent as Ally. She doesn't seem to get much mention and she also seemed to be overshadowed in any interviews I saw of Rob and her together.
I really hope that more and more people will see Remember Me. I feel like it's the "little train that could".
As others have already noted, Mr. Fetter, Mr. Coulter and Mr. Pattinson should all be commended for a lovely, touching film that stays with you long after you leave the cinema.
I stumbled across this site and I'm SO glad I did. It is so fantastic to hear the perspective of Will Fetters and to know that so many others "got it". I was quite dumbfounded by the critics' reviews of this film.
I walked away from the theater with such a deep ache in my heart. The raw emotion this film evoked from me had been untapped for many years and was transforming to say the least. I lost my mother and brother tragically as a kid, and it can be so difficult to describe the hole that was left in my heart to heal only with time. And just when I thought "I'm okay", Wham! A very dear friend died unexpectedly. Again, I couldn't find words to describe the deep ache in the middle of my chest.
This film does a good job of depicting how everyone handles tragedy in their own manner. No way is "right". And everyone has to find their own path to heal. I thought the ending was so tastefully done considering the subject matter. What struck me was not that it was just about the tragedy of 9/11 but more so that just when you think you're figuring out how to manage the pain of loss, the unexpected rattles your world. Leaving you to pick up the pieces yet again and figure out how to keep moving forward. And it is possible to find love/happiness outside of the anger and sadness. I've lived it, and I get it.
I thought this movie was very well written and acted. Very rarely does a flim move me emotionally as this one did.
I applaud those that made this film come to life.
I went into the film objectively. I had discovered the ending before I went, and was able to put it to the back of my mind while watching.
I felt that if you paid attention to the relationships, especially the one between Tyler and his father, there was a profound level of sophistication in this film.
There was a demonstration of cycles of negative behavior, and the therapeutic methods used to overcome them. Tyler when pressed had the same disposition as his father (his attitude and behavior towards his girlfriend when taking the drawing to his Dad's office) but we see most of the characters overcoming those issues just before the tragedy took place.
I enjoyed seeing the delicate nature of a wide variety of relationships, and their impact on each others lives. The end of the film, life going on after devastating loss, but not having the cliche' of CLOSURE, was so true.
This film hit home for me, and I don't think it exploited 9/11, I think it gave a nod to those who are true New Yorkers. The bulk of the film was about the relationship issues anyhow.
And the most surprising part: Robert Pattinson is more than just a pretty face, he can act. I had my doubts, must have been the material/directing for the vampire flicks that didn't serve him well.
Thank you. This film moved me, and that to me is success for any art form. Not shock, awe, and special effects without the content, like so many other films.
Dear Mr. Fetters, Mr. Coulter and Mr. Pattinson, with all the crap made these day in the entertainment industry (movies, music, etc.) you actually made a film that matters! Be very proud.
These comments were great. And "Remember Me" is brilliant.
I got dragged into this movie by my wife who wanted to watch a love story by her new found favourite new moon character Robert Pattinson.
But how the movie started with someone losing her loved one just tell me that this is not just another love story. And as I watched on, the characters, their relationships, the tragedies and the ending just intrigues me.
I don't live in NYC, never been there, I'm not American and I'm fortunate (and cont to pray) that tragedies like this don't occur to me. But I'm touched, just like many others in this forum have, perhaps to the same degree. I can't relate as well to the movie but it sets me thinking and felt the grief.
It's how this film touches my heart that sets it apart. It got me to step back and re-look at life. Treasure my love ones. It has already change the type of book that I would buy next to read (i'm still looking for one) and it may perhaps change some decisions I will make in life.
I can't tell if it's the best movie but it certainly is amongst the top and one I would "remember" for some time.
Thank you Will and Allen.
DS, I completely agree with your comments. I'm also glad I found this article about Remember Me. My friend and I saw the movie in Delaware where Will Fetters made an appearance. I wanted to congratulate him right after seeing the movie and to tell him not to pay attention to the negative reviews. It's very unfortunate that most critics found it exploitative. I found the film very sincere and thought provoking. It made me re-evaluate certain situations in my life just like we all did after 9/11. What happened that day was heartbreaking and although the movie did brought me to tears, I found it also very comforting at the end – when Tyler smiled after speaking to his father and when he became at peace with his brother's death. It is in that scene that I started to think about the victims of 9/11 and that they too had love and peace in them before they were abruptly taken away from their families. Likewise, I hope that their memories will continue to carry us through.
Finally! Someone who got it! Personally, I cannot fathom all of this negative response. Granted, I went to film school and this was the type of film I always dreamt of making. I got it, I understood, and it impacted me. The shock I felt while watching the end of this film, was the shock I felt the morning I sat getting ready for school and watched the second plane hit. Remembering is not a bad thing. Yeah, it made me cry, but I somehow felt more alive after watching this film. Anyway, I'm so thankful for this interview. I've been searching for great interviews with Will Fetters since I saw the film opening day and this is a great interview.
I do appreciate you Mr. Brevet, for taking the time to interview Fetters on his movie. One must understand, critics were already swayed by Robert Pattinson being in the cast, having high expectations or lack there of, and by the ending being leaked to the internet. I can definately say, I did not view anything about the movie online, besides the actual movie trailer.
I am a Robert fan from the Twilight series, though my intentions were more than just seeing a movie with him in it. I saw the trailer and I'm a sucker for romantic films. I did not know anything about the ending before seeing the movie, and I'm glad I was unaware of the ending. This movie opened my eyes more to grief, how everyone handles it differently, and how we really should cherish the time we all have together. When I first saw the movie on opening day, I was angered by Tyler's father and how he treated his son and daughter. However, I was not angry at the end the way most probably felt. I was angry because I felt a connection with Tyler's character and the love and new understanding on life that he was experiencing before the ending of the movie. Seeing the pictures uploaded to his father's computer helped him realize that yeah, his father did really care and was starting to come around. Grief doesn't have a timelime, people could be grieving for years.
I've seen the movie twice so far, and my intentions are to tell my friends and family about it, and to buy it when it first comes available on dvd.
Mr. Fetters, you did a wonderful job, writing this script, whether you were 22 years old when you wrote it or not. You did fantastic. Don't believe everything you hear and read about, especially when it comes to critics. Care about what your audience says, mostly the ones who actually "get it". Bravo Fetters and Brevet.
Allen, you also did an amazing job on directing and thank you for choosing such heartfelt actors for this film.
I enjoyed Will Fetters interview and think he should be so proud of his story Remember Me and the movie that was made. The impact of the story is a shock to all of us but it did happen and we do remember it and what we were doing when this horrific event took place. I am truly appalled with the critics who think this was something that should never be discussed or seen on the screen as it's history and painful as it was it happened. I think Tyler Hawkins and his family who were trying hard to survive the death of their son/brother's suicide and the scars and pain left by it was a very relevant part of the family's reaction to everything around them. I felt every actor did a wonderful job and I don't think anyone could of played their parts better… Rob Pattinson did such a beautiful job in this role making Tyler a believeable young man dealing with his love towards his sister, the sorrow and anger of his brother's suicide and how it impact the family. Ally,is not like his other one nightstands but a person who has suffered her own loss but continues her life and has her goals set. His gentleness towards her was endearing and I thought Emile did a beautiful job portraying Ally. I see this movie going down as a movie one shouldn't miss and I see this as Oscar material. It's one of the most thoughtful loving and heartwrenching movies I've seen in ages. Kudo's to you Mr. Fetters,the cast,the directors and everyone who worked on this film. This is something to be forever proud of and I am so grateful you presented it to us.
finally saw the movie and all i can say is that i wish higher ups would have left the original idea of Mike dying in 93 bombing of world trade center that is what drew me to the move and made my heart stop when i go to the end of screen play i was asured thsat Lumet rewrite was going to be better and I know she 's a hollywood pro from ahollywood family however I am not sure if it was for me .. sur e it would not have been contrived to have both mike and tyler die in a similar way it could happen in real life I did however love the movie . and not only becoz of rob but becoz it hit me straight in the heart.. TY will and the gang for making remember me and who cares about the critics they are not always right. BARB
I have to say I appreciate this site because I have read every comment that has been made regarding Remember Me. I think I am glad I did not read the original screen play.
I would like to say that Will, being young, has such depth and insight.
I adore Rob but I think about all of these characters every day. This movie touched my heart and soul in so many ways and continues to do so.
I've read lots of other good, solid, thoughtful ones here.
People need to go, critics too, of course, with open minds, and open hearts. It has become disgusting to me how many people are staying away for stupid, ignorant or petty reasons.
I've commented here before, with more thought out comments but I've got more to say. Since then, I've gone to see RM more than once, and the experience is incredible. More and more I see the depth and profundity of it, the fine calibre of acting–on everyone's part, but esp. Robert. He carries the movie and it's very impressive.
Also, the music score by Marcelo Zarvos is haunting, with just the right tone throughout. The 'morning montage' on Sept. 11, from when Tyler leaves his friends, up till his death, and the 'can you hear me' (title?) which follows, and which ends the film, is heartbreaking and uplifting all at once. You stay in your seat, stunned by the power of the film.
Robert said something pretty profound in a recent interview for the Mexican magazine 'Reforma'. I'll just quote as I read it:
“It’s about loss, how we handle grief, how it affects us. For many people, loss becomes part of who they are, and sometimes in order to overcome a loss we have to let part of ourselves behind as well; these are very rich emotions to explore and they contradict each other.” explains Pattinson.
That this man has been vilified is nauseating. He should be admired for having the courage to have a hand in producing RM and for making sure it got made well. Again, I applaud him and the others who did such fine work. And not only does this film stand up after multiple viewings, it seeps deeper into the soul. It is truly unforgettable.
And the more I think of the ending the more I think it is a very good one. A number of us have said we should not forget.
The fact that Tyler brought a human face to the tragedy, the fact that we loved him and lost him, brought a humanity to the universal sorrow of that day. I have loved and lost a 20 yr.old son and anyone who has known loss can relate.
Two twentysomething Robert fans were in the audience one time and at the end, one knew he'd died, but the writing on the chalkboard had not clued her in. Seeing him standing in the North Tower did not do the trick. Why? She's forgotten? Well, you can rest assured that she will not forget now.
I watched Ordinary People on TV the other night.
Remember Me is of the same outstanding calibre. It absolutely deserves Oscar nominations: Best film, Best Actor, Best Supporting Actor (Brosnan, maybe Cooper), Best Score, Best Screenplay. But I guess with the ridiculous and undeserved pans from critics and without someone like Oprah to spread the word, this won't happen. What a crying shame.
Anyone who is still reading here, not many I guess because the post is a week old, please go to this remarkable movie. You won't be disappointed. You'll be shaken, riveted, uplifted and it will not leave you. You will not forget.
jessegirl, I am at a loss for words, you express what I feel so beautifully, I cannot add anything better. I have a hunch that this film has started a sort of grassroots movement from the viewers in response to the critics' unfair treatment of the movie. Most of the comments match yours, everywhere in the whole world. And I think that we haven't heard the last of RM, we will get feedback from it when it opens in theaters in Europe and other countries. Sofar its BO numbers in Russia are incredible, although the movie had such a tiny number of theaters (only 290) : about $1 800 000! I'm suspecting the controversy about its ending may be partly specific to the American public – other countries will probably not vilify the ending. It's a beautiful movie and even if it doesn't blow away the BO – which it was never meant to dot – it has fulfilled its mission because it has succeeded in touching so many people's hearts. So thank you for your lovely, soulful reviews, keep on writing!
actuaklly that is why my heart stopped as i realized where he was and on what day
I'm still reading, jessegirl, and have been the whole time.
Because I can't remember the last film that moved me and stayed with me for days — weeks — afterwards like RM has.
I've already said my piece above, and you have said yours beautifully. Again, though, now my deep wish is that Fetters, Coulter, and Pattinson themselves could see this chain of comments. The heartfelt outpouring of genuine emotion from viewers, the appreciation of their work… I would love, love, love to know it's out there, as opposed to only seeing/hearing the pans of the critics.
I honestly think this is a movie that will have a longer life once it's on DVD, one that people will be talking about years from now. It has that beauty, that raw power, and that much validity in what it tried to do.
I just saw this movie and I did not read any of the reviews or know that it was even about 9/11. I was completely impressed with the ending. I really don't watch TV and I work alot so I don't have time to read reviews online and was really impressed by this movie. It left me thinking, oh my, was this a true story? While watching I kept playing with the dates in my head…1991 – 10 years later – 2001 and then I was trying to figure our how old Ally was when her mother died. I was surprised when the story moved so far away from the opening scenes of Ally's mother being shot, as I thought that was the basis of the movie. I felt the impact of the final scene – it was riviting. The viewer does grow close to the character and showing him in the window – knowing his fate was tragic and I cryed. I think it puts the viewer in the world of the ordinary person on that fateful day. The movie also lets the viewer experience what it would have felt like to lose someone in those towers. It was a great film and one I will soon not forget.
I watched it again with a friend and somehow the film just hit me harder than it did the first time. From the heartfelt script, brilliant acting, stunning score, wonderful cinematography and directing concepts, every intricate detail in each scene tied together with the essence of the film so beautifully I still find it hard to believe that people can watch the film and miss out on all these details.
Its incredibly sad that some people, like the friend I went to watch the film with, didn't fall in love with it like I did. Some people prefer movies that don't require too much thinking since to them its just a recreational activity that should only serve to entertain.
I like how Allen Coulter used a lot of zoom-ins and close-ups that allowed the emotions the actors depicted to come off so strongly. I cried at the start of the film when the pain on Neil's face was so evident. In a way it was painful since you couldn't look elsewhere, but by the end of the film it made people care for the characters like they've known them.
But the best thing was the way they paralleled the beginning and ending scenes. As cliche as it may sound, it was the "coming to a full circle" feeling that gave the film that sense of hope that the script was all about. The beginning scene of Ally at the subway witnessing her mother's murder, and at the end of it we see her letting the past go as she takes her first train ride in the past ten years with a smile. The look Neil had determined to protect the remaining person he loved as he hugged 11 year old Ally, and the look of resignation as he came back from the event covered in soot, hugging Ally as he realizes that he can only protect someone this much. And Charles who initially had a hard face as they were at the graveyard for Michael's death anniversary, and the look of pain and grief he allowed to surface after Tyler's death at the same graveyard. Even Tyler's mom, who had a pretty minor role, changed from the emotionally weak and dependent woman to someone who was strong enough to let others lean on as she became the one comforting Charles.
The film is not about getting closure from loss or putting grief to rest, because sometimes some losses are too painful to forget. It's about accepting the fact that pain is always going to be a part of our lives. I agree with what Rob said that "loss becomes part of who they are, and sometimes in order to overcome a loss we have to let part of ourselves behind as well". But even if we cannot let go of that loss, we shouldn't give up hoping and trying that some day we can learn to be strong enough to move on, carrying that loss with us.
Hi,I watched the movie yesterday. I don't know what to write exactly about the movie, because I'm still really moved and tormented about it, about its end! If I'm writing my comment here is just because I read the interview, looking for some explaination about the movie. I really needed to know what was in the minds of the writer and the director! It was a shock the imagine of Tyler at the window: before to understand, thanks to the music too, it was intuitable that something wrong was happening, and I had the impression that Tyler was looking at someting in the sky…wasn't he?But realizing everything thanks to the date wrote on the blackboard…it was a really shock. I thought:"no, they (who created the movie)can't do that!" like it was a bad and sad exaggeration!…and may be it was, but after reading this interview, I think I understood and I'm able to accept the movie end. I mean: the 9/11 event is something that I surely lived in a different way rispect to american people. I'm a 29 italian girl. I still remember that day. I remember how it was terrible and how I understood something was changing in the world. my lucky italian generation grew up quietly: war or everithing so bad, was just something about the past, about our grand-parents and something that we had to study at school! but I can share the Fetter's opinion about the end of an innocence period (that I think involved all the western world)after the 9/11 terrorist attacks.
Italians grow up slowly, I think, and even if I was 20 that year,when I finished watching the news… it was like I really realized I was not a kid anymore for the first time!
I was 20: the same characters' age..and even life here was very different, the way how 20 years old young people lived their love relasionships was the same. It's hard for me to think how could have been my reaction if Tyler was my boyfriend!I was not ready for such kind of pain at that time. nobody was (for an "event that came out of nowhere").but it's not just about love relashionsip. the movie is frankly about life all!
In my opinion this is the reason why the movie end is so difficult to accept at the first time! the world consciousness is still susceptible about it: 9 years couldn't be a really long time!
I think Remember me will open a new period of reflection upon the way people, all over the world, faced the 9/11 event in the last 9 years (and how they still do).
The power of cinema is something really excitng but so strong that it could be tasteless sometimes!!!
Anyway…after the interview reading (I read more then one, actually)I feel to say thanks to the autors of Remember me and to Brad Brevet for publishing this interview…because it helped me to understand and to reflect deeply about the 9/11 tragedy but also about many things of the life. And now that I finished writing you my comment…I realized I need and I want to watch the movie again…
During the week and a half since I saw this film I have been to site after site, responding to critics and reading the comments of viewers, and I am compelled once again to post here, in the hopes that those involved in the making of this film might read some of the stories written by those of us who feel that Remember Me is a touching, worthwhile, dramatic film rather than an offensive, manipulative movie made for entertainment purposes alone.
It disheartens me every time I read a review by someone who found this film to be cheap or exploitative. It saddens me that others didn’t see the beauty of this cinematic poem.
For the record: I am closer to 40 than to 30, I am an NYU alum, I lived in NYC for many years, and during that tragic time in history I lived close enough that I could smell the buildings burning, for days. I watched the horror on live tv as I tried to get in touch with the countless people I knew who could have been in harm’s way. I know people who were covered in ashes, whose apartments were filled with dust and smoke for weeks, who could have, and any other day would have, been in those buildings. A few weeks earlier my husband was on the same NY/SF flight, a year earlier my sons and I were on the Boston flight, I know people who searched for loved ones never to find them. The timing and subject of this film is nothing if not personal to me.
Many negative reviewers have posited that the only people who could respond positively to this film are those who don’t recall or didn’t experience the event themselves. Maybe that’s right, maybe a lot of people who have responded positively to this film do so because their personal reaction is more vague or generalized and this somehow brings it closer to them and makes it more tangible. Even in those cases I don’t see it as a bad thing. I see it as helpful. In any case I certainly don’t fit that criteria.
I can’t help but feel that somehow many critics are looking at this film backwards. Fetters and Coulter didn’t choose to use 9/11 to validate the characters; the characters are used to honor the memories of those whose lives were lost. It doesn’t “borrow our emotions”, as some reviewers rudely suggest, unless of course you watch the movie in reverse. The characters draw you in because they are relatable, the performances draw you in because they’re touching and believable. As with any film, though, you have your part too; you need to be willing to view it, willing to become involved; if you hold yourself at a distance trying to figure it out or are already focusing on what you think the ending is going to be or mean, then you will taint the experience. That can be said of any film; if you go in with an opinion it becomes almost impossible to watch it with an open mind.
Although I’d seen some of the promotional interviews and advertisements for this film, I managed to avoid the spoilers and I saw it without knowing the ending. I will admit that I related heavily to the characters in this film, on multiple, very personal levels. My life was touched and shaped by loss in my teens, I was damaged and wandering during my early 20s, I worked through several of my issues by writing, and I luckily developed meaningful relationships that helped me heal. There were elements of this film that were jaw-droppingly familiar to me, from Tyler and Aiden’s apartment (which was dirtier but otherwise remarkably similar to the one I inhabited in my NYU days), to smoking on the fire escape (which I did daily, often tripping on my way back inside), to the water fight (which I had under similar circumstances and also ended with me being carried into the shower as payback), to the many dates I had that involved NY street fairs or good night kisses alongside waiting taxi cabs…this film was, for me. a completely true-to-life New York experience. As most New Yorkers will tell you, we share a unique bond with our city; it is a bizarre relationship, sometimes it’s a friendship and other times it’s more like a bad boyfriend you should have dumped ages ago, but it’s always an entity of its own in your life. The film portrayed that entity, to me. It brought me back to my life in NYC in the pre-9/11 days; the characters lured me into their story. The performances, particularly of Pattinson, De Ravin and Jerins, touched me on a very personal level and I truly grew to care about the characters they portrayed.
This film clearly stated that it opened in 1991; it just as clearly stated that it came into the “present” ten years later. It wasn’t difficult to see that a spring semester of classes was ending, that a summer romance was occurring, that labor day was upon us—everything was there to alert the viewer that we were coming to that fateful day. I didn’t feel manipulated, I felt warned, which is more than I can say for the way I felt on the actual morning when I logged onto my computer and saw the non-descript headline “plane just hit twin tower.”
Yes, this movie packs a punch, I just don’t think that’s a bad thing. I watched in horror and in tears as I waited to see exactly where Tyler was that morning, much as I watched in horror as the event unfolded in real time on the actual day. Was it painful to remember? Yes. Should it be painful to remember? Yes. To me this film is a touching, respectful way to do just that; to remember. Not because I’ve forgotten any of it, which I haven’t, but because it’s important NOT to forget. It’s important to think about this event from perspectives other than your own, whatever that may be, because this film wasn’t about any one person or any one type of reaction; it was about life and the way that loss and tragedy can impact everyone, anyone, at any time.
Before seeing this movie I caught the briefest snippet of an interview with Robert Pattinson. He was asked about his role as Executive Producer and he answered by saying that he really wasn’t what he considered a “proper producer”, Nick Osborne was the “real producer”, Pattinson said he had only signed on as producer toward the end and he’d done so to “protect” the film. The word “protect” struck me as odd, enough so that I remembered it, and when I thought back on it after seeing the film I suddenly realized what he meant. This wasn’t a Hollywood portrayal of a known tragic event, it is a beautifully told story of everyday people who had their lives altered in unimaginable ways. This isn’t a love story, it’s certainly not a “teen melodrama”, it’s a slice of life. It not a cliché or an affront to the people who lived through 9/11, it’s honest and it’s a respectful homage to the inconceivable, unanticipated horror of that day. Focusing on the terribly mistaken assumption that 9/11 was invoked as a plot device is, to me, far more offensive and exploitative than anything about this film. Those who made this film were compelled to see it through and maintain the integrity of the project because they all believed in it and felt it was worthwhile. I personally couldn’t agree more. This film needed to be protected, and it was.
I can understand and respect that some people have a negative emotional response to this film, it is a topic that is personal to many people, and personal reactions are always understandable and valid, however I would hate to think that others might not see this film because they think that it is somehow manipulative or that it “repurposes (tragedy) for our entertainment” as some critics have stated. This is a film that should be seen by lots of people, and judged only after it’s been viewed. I’ve said this before, but it bears repeating: This movie is a tribute, not an insult, to the memories of all those who were impacted. It cheapens everyone, from those responsible for this film, to the viewers, to the actual victims of that horrific day to say otherwise. I have nothing but respect for Will Fetters, Allen Coulter, Nick Osborne, Robert Pattinson, Emilie de Ravin, Pierce Brosnan, Chris Cooper and all the other people who were involved in bringing this fictional but hauntingly real tale to the screen; I believe they all knew they were taking a chance by daring to touch upon such an emotional topic, but they all felt it was worth the risk, and I cannot thank them enough for having the courage to do so.
Kim, yes, hopefully foreign box office will help. I calculated current BO at approx. $22.5M, counting what foreign figures are on hand now. I feel all cineplexes should reserve one small theatre for Remember Me for the next 6 months–you heard me–to give the latecomers and naysayers another chance. I don't want to hear the word DVD until that has happened.
Jennifer, I too wish Will, Rob and Allen could/would see these comments, and those on a few other positive sites I've visited. But we can only do our part and leave the rest to fall where it will. We have little power. It is not in our hands.
The outpouring of soul-baring (sp?) stories from people who have seen this movie is itself very moving. It shows what this little $16M production with the mega heart has done. People are going inside themselves and finding the deep, sometimes tortured but always meaningful places inside themselves, because this movie has taken them there, guided them there. What an achievement! WHAT A GIFT!
I think some of us are trying, in our small and powerless way, to repay that gift. But the gift is so huge and the feelings so strong…
I don't know what the intent of the producers was; did they even figure on this particular result? No matter. What matters is that they were able to mine this gold by going about the business with authenticity and heart. They wanted this story told, and told properly and they did it.
Karen
I can't comment on all your good thoughts except about Rob wanting to 'protect' the film. I remember him saying that too. He and the others did a mighty fine job.
Oh, and what you said about how critics looked at the film backwards is so right. You speak so well about how the attitude one brings to a film can taint it ('holding yourself at a distance trying to figure it out'), as so many critics trying to be wise-asses did (and came off being just plain asses!).
And yes, Karen, not manipulated but 'warned'.
Simone, your comments heart me.
I love your last paragraph about loss, closure and what Rob said. Yes, I know.
Thanks to all those of you who have taken the time to comment here and made my life richer by sharing your heartfelt feelings and wisdom.
I know this following comment sounds sorta pompous but I'll venture it anyway.
Remember Me guides you into the depths of your soul and to your most powerful feelings, especially those of crippling loss, and gives you existential answers. It guides you to remembrance of love. It guides you towards that which actually means something in this crass world. It does this by making you come to love a young man who then dies tragically. How does it do this? Well, somewhere in the making of it, it has been touched by God.
jessegirl, All I can say AMEN!
Jessegirl, I agree with you this movie needs wide circulation so people can truly see what this movie is about.I feel the foreign movie-goers are going to send this movie over the top. I felt that the critics spent too much time admonishing the writer, directors and actors for even making this movie before truly exploring the message and the lives of the characters. it's ironic to me that they can
critize this movie when film-makers have always made movies of true things that have happened. We who have lost loved ones in all the wars and other terrible things that have happened still watch them because this did happen and it's history. Do we condemn the actors, directors ect. for portraying and showing these events–no we don't, we go, we watch and try to understand what and why this happen.I wish every high school teacher would have their Junior & Senior students see this movie and get their honest feelings on what and where they were when this happened and if they can recall any story that stays in their mind about this event. I think there are a lot of people who need to express their thoughts on this horrific day and Remember Me is the door to open the subject.
Will – I hope you are still wading through the comments on this site… so you read this one. Your responses in Brad's interview confirmed what I suspected, there IS more than a hint of reality to your work of 'fiction'. Your story rang very true – surprisingly enough for even my husband to ask me at the end of the movie "was this a true story?" Take pride in your refreshingly 'REAL' piece of work – for me it was a welcome change from the predominance of fantasy and reality-based-on-fantasy in the theaters now.
The cynical reaction of reviewers accusing you, et al of using 9/11 as some sort of gimmick to 'force' an emotional response is what has been downright offensive to me. I could see the smoke from my home in Northwestern NJ that week, I knew many stories of people who should have been there but weren't and who shouldn't have been there who were. If Hollywood had written the script of 9/11 no one would have given it any credence for 'believability' and critics would have shredded it. But because 9/11 actually did happen, now apparently there is a set of 'rules' that must be followed for anyone who dares write a story concerning it.
Yes, I went to see it because of Pattinson (I think the young man has a wealth of talent – he made me care about a 'vampire' – and I think the genre is silly) but I also wanted to preview it before I let my 13 year-old see it. She on the other hand wanted to see it NOT because of Pattinson (she thinks 'Edward' is creepy – thank goodness) but because she "thought it looked good". She was only 4 on 9/11. She cried at the end because she had really come to care about the characters Tyler, Ally & Caroline and was sad for all they lost and the 'unfairness' of it all. And what is with the reviewers who claimed they were 'sucker-punched' – even my 13 year-old caught on to what was going to happen before Tyler entered the building – fakers – what's their agenda?
In the end – I have to ask why are the reviewers so self-righteous in their anger at the 9/11 aspect of the story? Why don't they consider the mother being shot in front of her daughter as 'exploitative'? Only because 3,000 mothers weren't shot in front of their daughters at the same time? How self-centered we are as a society. Is a single tragedy truly so less important as 9/11? Not to the person who has lived it, I'm sure.
THANK YOU for sharing your work and for reminding (some of) us to be glad of all we can.
Oh, P.S. The opening scene of the mother being shot is the only part of the movie I didn't let my daughter watch (she dutifully ducked down and hid her face till I told her it was 'safe' to look up)…
Must see movie
I am touched completely by all of these beautiful, heartfelt comments. I am tempted to print them and send them to Rob's Agent here in Los Angeles. He and the rest of the cast, producers, writer and director need to hear these comments and know what their movie has done to people's lives. I want to see this movie again and I will. I have told numerous friends and family that they must see this movie. It definitely brought me back to the morning of 9/11 and the pain and loss that I felt as I watched those terribly sad images on my t.v. screen. The tears that I shed here in California over the stories that I heard of families trying to find each other will always remain with me and I thought of them everyday for many years, never thinking that I would forget or stop thinking of them. However, years went by and eventually I stopped thinking of 9/11 everyday. Since, seeing Remember Me, it has brought me back to thinking about these people again and their stories. Thank you to everyone that has posted positive things. I know everyone is entitled to their own opinion and if you felt ripped off by this movie that's fine but don't be the person that causes another person not to see this film and get the same feeling as the rest of us.
Kelli if you could do that it would be great. I also hope Will, Rob and Allen would be able to read the heartfelt comments posted here.
Kelli, what a great idea, I've been thinking exactly the same thing. I've seen other discussing threads too on other sites which are well worth printing too. It would be lovely if they ever got to read how people reacted to RM and all the sharing it has initiated between so many people.
Ok, so I printed out all 63 pages of responses and will get it in the mail tomorrow.
Please, don't forget mine. :) I was the last to post.
I'm sure they already read this i forwarded a link to this page and your comments. BARB
Hello. I just want to say that I am one of the people that understand this movie. I just saw this movie March 27 and I must say that for the past two days I have been trying in vain to digest it and let it go because it just affected me that much. I just so much appreciated this film, the story, and the intentions behind it. I get it. It is a wonderful story and people have to know that.
I understand all of the raw emotions associated with the movie. To me the movie is not just about 9/11; rather it is about something much deeper. It is about the appreciation of the little moments that life offers us and for some reason or other, we as people oftentimes do not take advantage and appreciate the beauty of those moments.
I also appreciate the story for its characters. In my experience, the main characters of Ally and Tyler are hauntingly accurate. As a young twenty-something in the early 2000’s, I know and experienced many of the emotions that the characters of Tyler and Ally experience. After having seen Remember Me, I feel a strong connection to those two characters because I was at one time or another those characters. I think that Mr. Fetters did a masterful job in portraying the twenty-something experience in a truly memorable way. The dialogue, Tyler’s internal struggle and monologue, the quote by Gandhi were perfect and reflect what twenty-somethings are truly about.
As for the ending, it was poignantly appropriate. Things happen in life and you learn to roll with the punches that life throws at you. In the end you come to have a deeper appreciation of life and all of the little happenings that naturally occur in life.
I just truly feel extremely grateful for this movie and bringing this story to life. Thank you, Mr. Fetters, for sharing this story with us and for your heart. Thank you to everyone involved with this movie. The story that this movie portrays will stay for quite a long time.
I wanted to post one more comment expressing my gratitude to Alan Coulter, Will Fetters, Robert Pattinson, the other actors, and crew who worked on this movie. Alan, I loved Hollywoodland, you brought Ben Affleck back to his roots and now look what he is doing, directing and acting in critically acclaimed films. Will, thank you for your story and screenplay, it was real and very moving. Robert, thank you for sticking with the project, I know you could have demanded more money or backed out of the project but you stuck to it and I really see you developing into a fine actor. To the other cast members, Chris always phenomanal, Pierce, always charismatic, Lena, always beautiful and moving, Emile, a very satisfying and moving portrait, Tate Ellington, very funny when we so needed it, and Ruby Jerins who is if not the best one of the best young actresses working today. The crew thank you for your dedication to the project because without you we would not have the priviledge to discuss this film.
**Spoilers**
This movie shows me that death in its many forms can either bring us together or tear us apart. A random act of murder brought together a father and daughter, although the father is overprotective you are unable to deny his love for his daughter and her love for him. A suicide tears a family apart through guilt and blame. Leaving family and friends devastated and to ponder how someone would get so low as to take their own life. It has you questioning what they could have done to prevent such a tragedy. There are national tragedies that can bring a nation together and also tear it apart. It looks at all those dynamics and Tyler speaking through narrative, lets us the audience know, to live life because no one knows how it will turn out. This movie gives you slices of life through the many forms of grief and healing. It was well worth my money and I look forward to all the cast and crew's future projects. They may not read this but I hope they know that they have inspired many people and hope the International Box Office treats Remember Me with better results and respect.
One more thing and I am done with this specific site until another issue that I feel very strongly to express my view comes along. When this National Tragedy occurred everyone was riveted to their televison screens, radios, computers, etc. At that time they were wondering how to get the country back on its feet after landing all domestic air flights and how we as a nation would deal with this tragedy. Many in the media with important voices expressed time in and time out that for us as a nation to go about doing our daily routine like we would do everyday, because only then would we triumph over the terrorists. After 9 years have we become a nation that has regressed instead of moving forward. Many critcs are so critical and bombastic about the ending of this movie. It concerns me that these individuals have not moved forward by their comments of "offensive", "insensitivity", and "shameful". We are a free society and they have the freedom to rip this small movie apart but I also have the freedom to never read another of their reviews to make my decision on what to watch. Others have the freedom to watch or not watch this movie and express their views, however, lets learn from this event and move forward and to never forget.
i forwarded this link to both Allen and Will so am sure they already red it.
Went into the movie completely clueless and thought it was simply beautiful. I hope you will forward all the comments to the writer, he seems to be struggling with the negative reviews. And I honestly agree with the statement that the critics just don't get it! The moview to me has so much depth. It not only shows how abruptly people can be take away, but it also really beautifully portrays how loss can break and build up people.
I think the writer did a fantastic job and the actors were excellent.
I finally got to see this movie yesterday and it touched me deeply. I almost couldn't sleep last night, because I just could't stop thinking about it. It just affected me very much. I personally think the story is very well told. You can feel the pain the characters deal and struggle with. I was very much impressed by the acting of all of the actors. Very well done!
I didn't read any spoilers, so I was shocked by the ending of the movie.It made me cry and I felt so sad on my way home. Not because I didn't like the ending or movie, but I think this movies shows the pain of 9/11. Though I'm not from NY or the US I could feel a bit of the pain of the tragedy that took place there. And it made me think, once again, of all those people who died that day and the life they once had, their stories. It should never be forgotten. Thank you very much for showing us this once again.
I am recommending this movie to everyone I know.. a must see!
Regarding the critics, who used the ending of RM as a means to an end:
First of all, they struck out on Twilight, because Rob made that film; he nailed Edward and no one could take their eyes off him. He's as handsome as a god, he is that overwhelmingly good-looking. For that alone, don't kid yourselves, they want to crucify him.
Critics care about how they appear, and they don't like it when a million screaming girls–supposedly–prove them wrong.
They insult all women who love Rob, Twilight, and RM. No one has yet said it, but there is some sexism going on here.
"Let's dismiss the women," critics say. "Let's diss the actor they adore, because females of any age cannot be right. WE are right, and don't you–the public–forget it!"
They think all they need do is say that adolescent girls love it to prove it can't possibly be good.
And they cannot admit that women of all ages–some of them not only mature, but educated, intelligent, sensitive and more perceptive and insightful than the critics themselves–they cannot admit these females know better than they do. They can't admit any female past 20 thinks RM is good, because then it has become more than a matter of dismissing adolescents. Then it is a matter of dismissing adults.
What will they trot out if adult women persevere (sp?) in their adulation? Blame it on PMS, on menopause, on pregnancy hormones or post-partum depression, or senility? They'll find something. You watch. They'll start to trot out one of those excuses to dismiss us.
Above all, by nature and by calling, critics think they know best and if someone bests them, they resent him–or in this case her. After all, they think it's their place to tell us so that we won't bother to evaluate for ourselves. We are supposed to believe them. They get nervous if we have minds of our own, and more importantly, if we follow our hearts. It's just not done.
If we're talking about RM specifically, those of us– female and male–who love it are allowing the film to work its magic within us just by keeping an open mind and heart. Only then can that great alchemical transformation happen within us. We can be changed, affected, moved, touched, brought to greater awareness. We can be, because we watch in the right way.
A great Jewish philosopher, Martin Buber, talked about reading a book 'in the right way'. You have to be open to it. It's the same with movies. You have to give them a chance to work on you, and if you do surrender a little bit of your judgmental attitude, that's okay, because something fantastic has a chance to happen within you. If the movie is good.
This transformation has happened with a lot of people who watched RM. Why? Because they disregarded the critics, they trusted themselves and they gave the movie a chance.
Someone on one of the blogs said that critics watch from a distance, holding themselves separate. This, they think, engenders objectivity. It does not, but that's beside the point.
The point is that all art must be entered into, experienced 'in the right way' as Buber says. You can't 'get it' if you are just out to get it. You can't be moved if you hold yourself apart from it.
The sad thing is that those who do not read books or watch films or plays or experience any art with the right attitude, miss the grandeur, the profundity, and the just plain loving beauty of it all.
Something I do not usually do is go back over comments but I find myself rereading the reactions of all here to Remember Me again and again. It is the stories of how this movie touched our hearts. I find it continues to stay in my thoughts. Thank you for all the heartfelt comments here and your own personal stories. As I said before, Jessegirl, eloquently put.
jessegirl-Thank You! If I could have said this in my first post-I would have. But you found my voice for me! I went to see this movie opening day- and it's still with me. It sneaks into my thoughts and haunts me with a will of it's own. Not only am I a fan of this movie and all who made it happen, but am now a Rob fan as well. I have seen all the interviews he's done connected with this movie, and not only is he a great actor in the making but such an insightful young man as well. And I am old (mature!) enough to be his Mother! I have really been moved and inspired by all of the comments here.I truly hope Will and Co. and all the critics get a chance to see these.
Thank you to Erma Jo, Melanie (and previously, Jan, Jennifer L., Kelli, Kim and Barb) for liking my comments.
Melanie, I noticed you wrote briefly the first day this post came up, and you're still here! Robert is, without a doubt, one of a kind. Remember Me has engendered such impassioned advocates among us–I count myself one of those–and it deserves so many voices speaking up for it.
So it still haunts you. Yes, it has set off a firestorm within so many people, the dimensions of which no one knows when they first step out of the theatre after that first viewing. This haunting quality is remarkable, isn't it, but it is tragically beautiful too, its force a veritable tsunami within.
I may have overdone the last post, painting all critics with the same brush. Of course I mean 'some' critics throughout my piece. I've gone through the stages of grief in my reaction to the 'bad' critics and now I'm just so saddened by their obtuse and flagrant disrespect. Is there some shell they hide themselves behind when they sit down to review some films? A barrier which will not let the truth of the film in? In a way I still wonder and in another I no longer care, because I will not listen again. I will trust myself, and perhaps people in places like this one.
@ Jessiegirl I was very touched by your comments.. don't know why, just were..
You can explain so clearly what this movie means to you or what it's about.. It's really interesting for me (and others I think) to read… thank you for that :-)
Jessegirl,
Again so well put! you are a great voice to listen to. I am moved more and more by what all of these comments have been saying. Simply put it was a great movie and Robert is a great actor. He is sincere and caring and that drives people crazy. They want so badly to find something, anything to complain about. It's really sad.
Kelli
@Jessegirl,
You are so perceptive and your comments are so eloquently written. I am a mature woman who believes Rob is gorgeous and handsome. I would say I am a bit obsessed with him. I am neither narotic or have PMS and know that it is more than teen girls making Twilight a success.
Your comment on sexism is so true. I did not read or hear from critics that when SuperBad, a comedy aimed for the teenboy fanbase, state that it was teen boys driving the success of that movie. I loved Twilight, even though they mutalated the meadow scene. As for New Moon, I was disappointed in Rob's performance, the chemistry between him and Kristen was dead in that movie until the end when they reunited, although in the Volturi lair it still was lacking until the bedroom scene. The chemistry did not fully develop and I was shocked because Rob is a much better actor. When I saw Remember Me, I was mesmerized by his performance and did not once think of him as Edward Cullen. His performance was real and moving. Although he needs to improve the excessive eye blinking that can be distracting while he is performing, I am certain that will improve as he acts in more movies.
You spoke about Art, and I have stated in previous comments that all great Artists from Mozart, Van Gough, Elvis Presley and the Beatles, are always critized when their art was first displayed or heard from the public and it is only after years of them performing, displaying or listening to their artform or after they have been dead for awhile, do those in future generations appreciate their work. I believe Remember Me will be one of those movies that will have the appeal it so richly deserves for future generations. Unfortunately with biased critics and an audience that only focuses on a performer's fame instead of his or her current project there will always be those little gems that will go unnoticed until others in the future discover them.
I too am an older female that simply adores Robert…..I have enjoyed him in all of the movies that I have seen him in and never once did I say "oh he just reminded me of so and so" from another movie he's been in.
First, I want to tell that I'm from Mexico City, so I lived the 9/11 from a very different perspective… When I went to see this movie, I knew the end because I read it somewhere in the web, but I was skeptical about the "romantic story" thing, then I read some comments about the movie and I was like "just because is Rob and Emilie it doesn't have to be a romantic story" And I was right, this is not a romantic story, is a LOVE story. A love story between a boy and a girl, and this same boy and his sister, and his mother, and his dead brother, and his father… I saw Tyler shouting out loud to this people that surround him, shouting that they HAVE to LIVE no matter what… and trying himself to make the difference… The anger, the frustration, the disillusion is just the way that Tyler have to make his father wake up from the lethargic state that Michael's suicide leaved. This story really touched my life, since the day I went to the theater I'm trying to touch lives, because as Tyler quotes Gandhi: "…whatever you do in life will be insignificant. But it's very important that you do it…" and I'm trying to do it, no matter how insignificant this will be… a smile in the subway, a word to a sad friend… whatever, because (as Gandalf said Frodo in The Lord of the Rings) "All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us…" Thanks Will, thanks Allan, thanks Rob, and thanks Brad for write about it… And as Bay said, this movie made me FEEL something and it lingers in my mind and in my heart… (please if my english is too bad, forgive me!! ;-))
Well put! Love it, love that the movie is doing well in other countries because it seems here in our own country some people just don't get it!
Natascha and LindaL…
Thank you for your feedback to my comments, which, I fear, are too many and too long. I'm glad that you feel that I've explained what others also think because, although I only speak for myself and would never want to put words in someone else's mouth, it gratifies me to know others feel and think similarly about this film.
LindaL…I was thinking about the demographic for the film. Studios are always targeting a certain demographic–albeit with the aim of catching the largest one–and with Twilight they've had to take the box office clout of teen girls into account. But Remember Me, weirdly, cuts across all demographics (except children). Women, yes, but women of all ages, teen girls and men and boys (if they've been exposed to it). I've seen comments on this and other sites from people all over the world, like Laura–above.
It cuts across that huge demographic yet doesn't own all in it, because only those, as I said before, who are open-minded and of receptive hearts, will respond.
That said, some people are not ready for it, perhaps they lost someone on 9/11 and haven't gotten to that place in their grieving which allows them to absorb the suckerpunch RM is. Grieving is a very individual thing, even if it has aspects similar for all. When those people get to that place this film will be able to work its transformtive power on them. They must wait.
And of course Remember Me actually will not allow certain people in. Like any good creative effort which comes from the well of pure intent it demands certain things. Laura, you mentioned great artists like Van Gogh, whose art may not be recognized until much later. Yes. But my point is that great art, whether it be Sophocles' Theban plays or Mahler's 8th symphony, DEMAND something. And if viewers, readers, listeners do not give also, the art either remains silent for them, or comes across as distorted.
I said in an earlier post the Remember Me is a gift. Oh yes. But I didn't realize until now that it also demands respect, the right attitude, mind set, and most of all, -heart. If viewers can't or won't give it that, they'll see only part of what it is, or, worse, a distortion.
Laura…
I liked that you were reminded of LOTR: 'decide what to do with the time given us'. The Gandhi quote from Tyler ends with: 'it is important that you do it because no body else will'. That's what Tyler discovered. Nobody could do what Tyler did. No one can do what you can, Laura.
I was saddened that Will Fetters has so much negativity to contend with. He's a young artist, with things to learn–as we all have–but his story is one which, as you said LindaL, time will vindicate. He will have gotten the bulk of our comments and will read them at some point. I only hope that he will learn that the masses, and critics, and box office, have limited import. I hope he will take our words to heart and not dismiss or minimize their import. In the end he reached the right people.
I'd have the same message for Robert–apart from all the others-hah-that I've posted–if he read it. These are sensitive men who, in giving their story and performance, give of themselves. Yes, Robert was acting, but there is true vulnerability in that. Perhaps he chose RM because it would garner post-Twilight success on some level. But he could have chosen other stories, superficial ones, easy successes. He chose something of substance and depth. And he chose to back it, to ensure a quality result.
I don't want these men hurt by the negative fall-out.
Perhaps in some way the experience has toughened them.
But, if they can hear me–'I know you can hear me' if you want to–I might say: Don't give up. Don't stop being vulnerable and driven by that which is true and important, which resonates with you. What you have done with this film was significant and very worthwhile. Listen to those who know.
And I would quote a renowned author Jane Yolen, who said, of folklore's demands, to paraphrase: 'You never get without giving'. This applies to audiences of Remember Me.
Will, Robert, you choose demanding material so that you can give of yourselves. Then what you do is a gift to us, but it also demands that we give. With the time that has been given to us, if we do this, we do well.
Jessegirl…It's funny we keep meeting on message boards. LOL I find that I can't stop checking to see if anyone else has posted. I want to remember 'Remember Me' and not lose the feeling of loss and of hope the movie left me with and it gives me hope when others 'get' the story that this little movie will not fade completely into obscurity. In hindsight there were so many things against it that it's a wonder it did as well as it did. A fickle fan base, bad marketing, a plot that defies easy description, a sad ending and scathing reviews make even 18 million seem like a huge number. The worst part for me is knowing how good and important a movie it is and seeing so many think they have the legitimate right because of it's box office to call it a crappy movie. And people that haven't seen it buy into that without thought and will probably never see it. And it's hard to explain to someone that yes you will cry when you see this movie but you'll come away a better person for it. Everyone wants to be happy these days, or if they do watch something sad they want it on a superficial 'Nicholas Sparks' level where they can forget about it five minutes after they walk out of the theater. If you told them it would linger on their minds for weeks, or even months afterward they'd be even less inclined to see it. And unfortunately you can't tie people to the chair and make them watch. At least not until it hits dvd and then…who knows. *g* I guess I need to stop worrying about it since there's not much I can do, but it does give me some satisfaction hearing others tell their stories of seeing the film and better yet rebutting someone who gets it all wrong.
Hi everybody! many thanks for all your comments!It's fantastic that a movie can raise so deep feelings and connect peolple all over the world!
I put a picture from the movie in my desktop. It's that one where Tyler and his sister are on the statue in Central Park. I found the movie's soul in this picture and I love to watch at it everyday. It's like a post-it that "remember me" to look after people I love and to try spending well my life, because it is really unpredictable but special at the same time!
Chris, yes it's funny how we keep track of the message boards…
Jessegirl, I just love to read your comments…
I realized that I wrote leaved instead of left… sorry, it's a little difficult for me to pour my thoughts into a foreign language
Does anybody knows if someone already sent all this comments to Allen, Will or Rob?? I think it'll be great that they know how many people was touched with their movie…
Laura, I printed them out and mailed them to Rob's agent here in the states. I am also going to mail them to his agent in London. I want to make sure that he and they see them! These comments are amazing!
Everyone, you might know that RM is doing pretty well in the non-American market. The total gross is estimated now at $45M+ and counting. That's good for a small movie. And DVD sales will help disseminate its beauty. You can post a review on Amazon.com under the RM DVD listing. Cool. You can help others decide to buy it.
Chris, yeah, what makes us check back? The movie that won't let go.
Laura, thanks for being affected by my ramblings. I've written here and on other sites because I believe in this film. I believe–truly–that it will become a classic, remembered for a long, long time.
Kelli,
Thanks for the effort. I don't know if they'll read them, get them; I'm a bit cynical about the process. Fame isolates people like Robert, of necessity, since the frenzy following him is mind-boggling. I don't know how he keeps his head on his shoulders but I'm really impressed with this aspect of him.
However, he has to separate people into before and after fame, and will not be able to trust the 'after' group no matter how much he may want to. I think that is a truly sad part of being as famous as he is.
Of course, that has nothing to do with our comments here, as it is only our words, not our selves, he'd have to contend with, and that's pretty safe for him.
Now Will I could see because Brad interviewed him. If the comments went through Brad as follow-up to the article, Will would be likely to read them, and take heart, which is what we want him to do, right? And he could let Allan and Rob–or anybody else heavily invested in making the film–know.
I've more than had my say about this. But it still haunts me. I need to attend to the book I'm writing but this story has taken me to a rich vein of profound meaning somewhere inside me which I must mine now.
I have total faith in the process and in where 'Remember Me' has guided me. It's astounding. Furthermore, I'm wondering where it will lead so many others, both those who have commented and those who have not. Because I think that its effect will be far-reaching.
I believe that in future people will come to it in their own time, will give of themselves while they watch, and then will be gifted with what the film has to offer them.
Well…
jessegirl,
I'm from France (I'm the one posting under the ridiculous name of WhyIstheRumAlwaysGone on this other site – you know where -) and the movie was released last week (on April 7th) in my country. We are lucky to have this huge French-speaking discussion forum where we can discuss Remember Me apart from Rob's other films and the Twilight stuff, and I thought you would be happy to know the RM thread is extremely busy! We exchange our feelings, our emotions, our reactions to the film… everyone is deeply moved by the film, the feedback is always the same : the film haunts us, it won't let us rest, it grips us, i's gut-wrenching and it makes you rethink about life, death, grief and love. People on the thread are taking everyone they can to see it and many are repeating viewings. The younger poster is only 13, the oldest is 52. One beautiful thing: RM makes generations share – the oldest of us take a lot of time to explain the deeper levels and meanings of the film to the youngest and I can tell you the teens are fascinated by our explanations and that they totally get it. It's abso-freaking-lutely wonderful. We all respond to RM on different levels according to our age and our experience, but everyone agrees : the film is simply breathtaking. It's really wonderful.
Kim, I enjoyed your post also. I am way older than the oldest you mention. : ) I am still haunted by RM, in a way that keeps touching my heart and soul. I cannot stay away from all the posts. Each positive post leaves an imprint on my heart.Thank you!
@Kim,
It makes me so happy to know that this movie is touching so many people in other countries! It was such a horrible day for us here in America and we have felt isolated from the rest of the world at times because of all that happened after, the fall out, the hate for Americans. It's a rough place to be. I love America, love being American and feel so connected to the people of New York, but having Robert who is British take on this VERY American part made me feel a way that I have NEVER felt before, that I want to visit other countries outside of my American bubble. I have never wanted to visit England or France but now? Yes, I think that I am ready for it. Thank you for your great encouraging words. Keep them coming!
@Jessegirl
again mind blowing comments from you. I love reading everyone's comments, they are wonderful! Thank you…..
Erma Jo…You're like the eternal flame that burns for all of us, keeping the faith…
Kim…*hugs*
Oh, the news from France is so good. Thanks for letting me know. I'm a bit envious of the discussion forum, which is different from blogs and this type of thread. I'm still a bit of a technophobe so don't know if there are similar ones in English. My high school French sucks. I'm so glad you have a place like this to go. Let me know what happened with those people you took. If there are any stories or insights you could share from the French forum, I'd love to hear them, (here or elsewhere).
I love the news of the intergenerational aspect! I could tell from all the discussions on the sites already, that every age responds. That it speaks to them all says something.
I think of new things constantly.
For example, weird 'mirroring' things:
1)-Ally was 11 yrs. when her Mom was shot and Caroline was the same age when Tyler dies.
2)-Michael and Tyler were both 22 when they died (that was obvious from the get-go and Tyler blowing out the candles is, of course, basic foreshadowing–I can't look at that scene without choking up now).
3)-We meet Tyler when he is outside on the fire escape, looking inside when he hears the phone ring. We leave Tyler when he is inside the North Tower, looking out. I think this significance was built into the film deliberately. Tyler, at the beginning and throughout the film, is tortured and looking inside himself, looking in. At the end he is at peace and looking outside himself, greeting the day. (Ironically.)
4)-Of course there's the obvious mirroring of Alley at the subway in the first scene, and her braving it at the same station in the last scene, indicating the impact Tyler made on her life, while that heart-taking music plays.
5)-Back to meeting and leaving Tyler: The most wrenching thing. We meet him: we look out his apartment to see Tyler safe outside, on the fire escape, smoking. When we last see him he is inside the tower and he is trapped, with no fire escape. From his position in the tower and our knowledge of where the plane struck, he would have been engulfed in the first firestorm, gone in an instant.
6)-To take the ideas (3&5) further:
He is physically safe outside on the fire escape at the beginning, but is in grave emotional peril, which is illustrated by him stumbling into the room, as he stumbles through life.
And the end he skips in the hall towards his father's office, insouciant, like a carefree kid, and he calmly occupies that room with every little graceful movement. The way he lovingly smiles at the family photos, becoming more and more tranquil. (I love when he gently touches Janine's arm as he passes by her. She's sorry she doesn't remember Michael's birthdate but Tyler knows she cares. This was a very touching moment.) He now inhabits a serene emotional place. And that's the point the camera chooses to tell us where he is.
For me the shock was not so much 9/11, when he stands there. For me it was that his internal journey, from floundering to forgiving, had taken him to a beautiful soulful spot and he would die there. He would be taken away at just that point. The breath-taking beauty of his promise to the world was taken away just when it was unfurling. His voice-over when we see his journal lying in the rubble -'and I forgive you'- is the clincher really.
It's as if this is what his spirit is telling us all, in Robert's beautiful voice. But we will never see him again.
Oh yes, the final montage with that heartbreaking Zarvos score shows us Tyler's impact on the world, how each life has been changed by him. How he is remembered. And that's the uplifting part. But it is still so heartbreaking. Why? Because he is gone and all we have left are memories.
It haunts because that is the thing we, the survivors, cannot come to terms with. A young and–let's face it, physically beautiful–life is taken from us at just that turning point of his life. The promise of his new understanding and of his breakthrough shines like a beacon for one glorious moment. And then–at that exact point–Tyler is murdered, taken away. And we have to go it alone. And it is hard to bear.
xo
Okay, jessegirl, I want to know when you finish your book! I will buy it. : )
Jessegirl, I noticed the same things–the age when Ally's mom died and when Caroline loses Tyler, and of course Michael and Tyler's ages when they die.
You make some beautiful points in this post. To carry one of yours a little farther, even though the pain of having Tyler taken away from us is very hard to bear, considering all he's been through and all we've been through with him, the growth of each character–whether Ally taking the subway, Aidan buckling down and studying and getting Tyler's name tattooed on his arm (another mirror–this time of Michael's tattoo over Tyler's heart), Caroline's dad spending time with her doing what she loves (which he previously dismissed). . .all of these offer us hope and remind us that the ones we love and have lost will always live on in us.
This movie really did haunt me–so much so that I had to go back and see it multiple times–and it's a film I wish had been out when my husband died. It has profoundly touched my life, and I've recommended it to many people I know.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts so eloquently.
Wow I'm actually almost crying when reading this.. :-S Weird..
Those things are exactly the things I were thinking about after seeing this movie..
Is it weird to still be moved by that? This movie still hasn't left my mind..
And indeed when you finish up a book someday.. let us know.. your writing makes me curious as well :-)
I just had to tell you that I had posted a few times early on, way back at the start of the comments. But I've been following them all along, every day — I get them at my email inbox whenever a new one comes up.
Jessegirl, what you've written about this movie, and how it makes you feel, is so raw, eloquent, poignant, and beautiful. Wow. Just… wow.
I saw this movie on opening day (3/12) and it just FLOORED me. I was in a fog, a funk, for the rest of the weekend. I couldn't shake the mood, couldn't shake the film. It haunted me. It still does. Can't remember the last time a film got inside my head and stayed the way this one has. Nice to see, judging by the many posts, that I'm not alone in this.
I initially got on here because I was desperate for Will Fetters to know that what he wrote was GOOD, that it moved people — I had seen how, in those first few weeks, he was hurt by the bashing the critics gave this movie. I sincerely hope he has since seen some of the posts written — worldwide! — of how this movie touched them. And Rob and Allen too.
This movie is destined to be a classic. Give it time. People are still too close to 9/11 to be able to be objective. The performances were so real, so nuanced, by everyone in this cast — a movie that moves people to gush over it the way people have on posts like these proves that their work wasn't in vain, and this movie will have its due one day.
Jessegirl, all great points. I love listening to people discuss the movie. I get so many insights from you and others. There's so much great stuff in Remember Me, either through design or accident. If they put all of this in deliberately then they are some truly great filmmakers. If some of it was just coincidence…well, I hate to say a higher power was involved or something hokey like fate, but this so much more than just another movie. I really makes you think and it gives more back with each showing. Just amazing…
jessegirl,
You are amazing. You have such mad skills with the written word, it leaves me speechless. I rarely comment on blogs, I like to read other people's comments because I am very self conscious about my writing skills. I only comment when I feel strongly about an issue or discussion. I love your points about the movie and felt the same way when Tyler touches Janine's arm, he seems closer to her than he did with his father. This is what touched me in that scene, that when I knew he was going to perish in the building, it was comforting to know that he was with someone who cared for him as he also cared for Janine.
You really should write a book or screenplay you are exceptionally talented. Thank you for your insightful views on this wonderful little gem of a movie.
Totally agree!
I thought I'd finished for the night but thought I'd check back here before I turned off my machine–obsessed at all?–and I found all your cool comments.
Erma Jo…
Thanks for the vote of confidence about my book. I will actually be embarrassingly grateful for readers. :)
Actually, it is finished and my sisters are reading it. Thumbs up from that quarter but–like Will F.–I will have to face 'real' critics sometime. No, I need to find an agent who will hopefully then get me a publisher. But I just want to write and am procrastinating about the business end. I need a champion with clout.
What I meant was, I have 2 sequels in my head, have written little bits and arced storylines in a general way. Not sure what I'll be willing to put my characters through this time.
Verlinda…
Yes, hope. (Sorry for your loss. I think people who have already lost someone significant in their lives as you and I have, have been especially moved by this film. Can absorb it so well because we 'know'. -Or can't because they're at the wrong 'stage' of grief.)
Hope has always been a bugaboo for me. I lost my 20 yr. old son–the true angel in my life–after he'd been missing for 6 months. That's when his body was found (not suicide). I should not say more here. Too private and painful. But the point is that for six long and agonizing months I had to hope, and it was the cruelest thing I've ever experienced. Hope might keep us going, might be necessary, but it's a killer. That's the paradox. Insanity might be kinder.
You might want to scroll up and re-read Simone's comments on loss, her last paragraph. Hope and loss always intertwined.
Chris…*waves*
With great art it is always 'a higher power' of some kind which is involved. But it would not be involved unless the artists–here the writer, actors, director at least–had, as I've said before, purity of intent, and respect for the material. You cannot create great art without the right attitude and belief in the work. With it, all the blessed powers will assist you because–whoever or whatever they are–they too believe. And when they do, watch out.
Yes, something otherworldly was definitely working, weaving itself into the process of filming Remember Me. We all feel it and we disregard critics because we KNOW. It's as simple as that.
LindaL…
As mentioned above, I actually have written a novel.
Thank you for your compliments. *reddens*
Your own comments are always well-written, by the by.
I don't think screenplays are my forte, and I don't know enough about how movies are made to attempt one.
Everyone,
The thing is, there have been so many wonderful, impassioned, insightful and thoughtful comments on this thread by so many people and I have learned from them.
I thank all of you for that.
@Jessegirl
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mother in a senseless car accident almost 21 years ago, it is the most horrible feeling in the world to loose someone. My brother and I are exactly the same age difference as Tyler and Caroline. This movie just moved me and spoke to me in ways that others never could. I don't know if you have read the book "Water for Elephants" this will be Robert's next movie that he is filming, in this book the main character, Robert's character, goes through a terrible incident…I have never had my feelings of my mother's car accident written out before but boy it really hit's home. I am utterly impressed with the roles that Robert has taken on outside of the "Twilight" world…he will be a great actor. He seems to be handling the success with grace, grace under pressure.
Again thank you so much for your beautiful writing skills!
Kelli
@jessegirl (**big hugs**), kelli, ermajo – thanks for replying. I'll try and post some of the most significant comments from the French thread here (I hope they will let us go on discussing and not close the comments here some day… else I will have to set up a special blog for us all to meet and exchange!). Just now, I can contribute a bit: yesterday I took a friend to see it. He's a married man, aged 46, he has 3 teenage sons and know nothing about Rob or Twilight and had no idea what RM was about at all. Well, he was blown away by the film. I heard him laugh and react and fall silent at all the key scenes. When the credits started rolling he turned to me and thanked me, and he said: "can we sit here a few minutes before we leave the theater ? I need to collect my thought and get a bit of control.. this film is so powerful, I'm a bit overwhelmed…" He then told me briefly that he was really impressed by this "young actor who reminded him of James Dean and who looked so incredibly handsome and who really gave a great performance", and that he was particularly intestested -as a man – by the depiction of the father/son relationship, which reminded of his own conflicts with his father. We went to dinner and talked and talked about the film and its many themes and he promised that next time we went again to dinner, we would start with the dessert. He said it was a beautiful film which had many layers, many interpretations. The only thing he intensely disliked was the ending, he did not see it coming and thought it was tacked-on. I will try some day to discuss it again with him and will send him Will Fetters's interview.
@jessegirl there is a great discussion of all the symbolic aspects of the film on a special RM site : go to http://www.rememberme-film.com/ and look for the posts on framing/mirroring, artwork IN RM, etc, it is very interesting.
Kelli…
Sorry about your Mom. The more I talk to people about this film, or they to each other or on blogs or comment boards, the more they share their losses. What I find interesting is that whatever loss it is, from a miscarriage to losing someone on 9/11 itself, this film retrieves it and shines its bittersweet light on it. From there, each individual deals with it. The film is the catalyst.
'Water for Elephants': Great book, and yes, I follow Rob's career and know he'll be shooting it in May. Great role with lots of possibility to stretch those acting chops.
I think, though, despite his lack of formal training, Rob is one of the most natural actors around.
Kim…
Thank you so much for sharing that story about the middle-aged man you took to the film! That's exactly the type of thing I was thinking about.
Now I hold men's views about it no higher than women's, except that so many women are Rob fans and are predisposed to be positive (just as many critics, driven by their need to lash back mindlessly, are negative).
Your friend's view would, however, likely be untarnished by such prejudices, so it bears attention. That he should be so moved, and say, 'this film is so powerful I am a bit overwhelmed', need to collect himself, then to talk about it, tell me his behaviour and sentiments echo those of so many women–and some men–who have been commenting on the blogs and sites. His reaction carries some weight, and just confirms what so many of us have been saying.
He said the film has many layers. Yes, and as such, repeat viewings can shift one's perception. I still think that the relationship of Tyler and his Mom was not dealt with enough. But the whole 9/11 thing, I've come to see differently. I've, generally, seen more in the film every time I've watched it. It can sustain–and actually needs– repeat viewings.
What I'm getting around to saying is that if your friend saw it again, he'd perhaps see the ending as a proper conclusion. Yeah, if he reads what Will was going for, he might understand that it was never tacked on.
I think, because it is such a shock, people initially think the ending is tacked on. The shock itself annihilates thought because it subsumes everything. That's what shocks do. And they anger because they make us vulnerable. So we criticize.
Thanks for the link to that site. I guess others have noticed some of the same stuff I have. I'm sure there's more. I'll check it out.
Oh and it's so good that your friend loved Robert's performance, which, as I've said somewhere, somehow, would make or break the film. It is the cornerstone. If Rob had failed the film couldn't work, because, for all the great performances of the others, it is Tyler's story. Because Robert gives such a fine, nuanced and passionate performance, we are taken and wrung out, -taken hard. That's it.
<3 you.
@ Kelli: I do think this movie has touched hearts in many other countries. I can speak for myself here in Amsterdam, The Netherland. When I saw the news on 9/11 I actually cried, the more I saw about this on the news, the more I felt for NYC. That could have been everybody.. If I lived there I might have worked in one of the towers..Please do know we all feel for you… for all the people you lost that day.. We should never forget this day.. This movie made me realize this very much so..
@Natascha: Thank you so much! It has just amazed me the love for this movie…..the film critics just got it wrong…didn't they?
Absolutely :-)
This is something a friend of mine told me. We belong to this French RM discussion group and one of the girls was very shocked as she reported that a group of tweens had laughed out loud at the ending of the film, saying « wow so this is the famous twist, hah hah it’s great, it’s so funny ! ». We all tried to comfort her and one my friends then told us of one session she went to, when another group of people also laughed deliberately at the ending (I’m sorry to report this, but the reaction here in France of some young teens or tweens can sometimes be a punch in the gut – some of them have not taboo at all and show a total lack of respect, whatever the subject, even if it’s 9/11).
This is what my friend posted on the forum:
« This is the 5th time I’ve seen Remember Me. I think some people need to laugh at a tragic ending, and behave in such an irrelevant way because crying would prove that they have weaknesses, whereas their bursting out laughing and ridiculing the ending is their way of not accepting this ending.
Some girls are die-hard Rob fans and confuse him with the fictional Tyler character, and they cannot accept to see him die. Similarly, most of them remember 9/11 but cannot accept it.
Personally, I still feel the same grief when I recall 9/11, and this grief is not only connected to the attacks but also to my own losses in my life. (…) We were the direct witnesses of 9/11, we have felt it in our heart and in our guts. Our reactions can vary according to the age of the viewers. Some on this forum were only preteens when it happened but they still can remember it strongly, but we must not forget that others of the same age may not have seen the images of the tragedy, perhaps because their parents did not let them, so as to protect them from the horror of that day. (…).
Yesterday I went to to see the movie with a friend, so I approached in a different way because we could share.
But today I went back to the theater alone, and so I was alone with my soul and my grieving.
I saw teenagers laughing out although they had tears in their eyes, I saw young girls cry because Tyler died and they were mourning his loss – but not 9/11, and I also saw a young man crying his heart out because he told someone he loved had died in the towers and he was reliving the moment.
This made me want to share with this young man, I wanted to cry with him, so I asked him if he wanted to have a drink and talk about it. We talked about his grief, how hard it was for him to go on with his life and how he could not accept the « bloody stupid death » (those are his own words) of his friend, who was unlucky enough to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.
He found it unbearable that the tweens in the theater had laughed at the ending, so I tried to explain to him the root causes of such a reaction. He was able to listen to my own grief and to understand my point of view. Today- ten years since his friend died – he still cannot accept his friend’s death, but he finds it somewhat easier to speak about it.
Somehow, talking together helped us so much today. Whether we appreciate th film or not, I have the feeling that it stays with you and that it conveys a deep message and makes us want to communicate about it.
So do not forget… Remember… one moment, one life, one smile, one look, one gesture, one word, one unknown person talking to you…
As we remember, we have the feeling that the one we loved and who died is somehow more present."
This is what my friend posted and I wanted to share it with you.
@Kim: I had that reaction here too in California. The girls went to see the movie for Rob and thinking that it was solely a love story and they were very disappointed that it wasn't what they expected but if it made them think about what you would do in those last moments then it did it's job.
Natascha…Do the tweens laugh in the Netherlands too? Just curious about whether it's just the French, or European, although Kim's story is the only one I've heard.
Kim…
There is no new thread on our other site but your stories would be ones the others would be interested in (esp. the one who deals with adolescents). Obviously, only a few diehards are still here. Hmm. Perhaps you can ask for a new thread? I wonder whether those on the continent still have things to say. Your stories should be shared!
The laughter. I've tried, in the past you know, to come to terms with what you've reported, but your explanation seems correct. Is it only a group mind-set, because the teens are self-conscious about how they appear in public? Is that what you meant by weakness? Would they behave like that if they came alone? Because I can understand if the other man was upset; it was so disrespectful.
Interesting that you say that when you went alone some girls were laughing through their tears. I observed at one showing one teen consoling the other, who was crying because she was imagining Robert dying (no laughter though). The friend kept saying, 'He's making more movies, right now.' Perhaps some of these teens have not had tragedy or big personal grief in their own lives, or they would know.
Even though you and I have rationalized this laughter, I still don't get it. Not really. Remember that poignant music after the black out, playing throughout the legacy montage. Laughing through THAT! I'm afraid I would have confronted them later; it would have upset me so. How can one not be sitting quietly letting that music wash over you?
I went separately with my best friend, my husband, my sister, and then a number of times by myself. And, just as with anything in life, one's public reaction is often different depending on who one is with. I behaved a little differently with each of my companions. My girlfriend is always more interested in the reaction of others, deflecting focus on her reaction. This always jars me.
And when I went alone I had no pressure to behave in tandem with any companion and that was liberating. But teenage girls would never go alone, the pack mentality rules and it is harsh.
But I wouldn't have been brave enough to approach the young, grieving man, so your sympathy was really worth it. That was an important thing you did.
On another track, and then I'll shut up.
I went to that website you recommended, Kim. I was a little flabbergasted, in that they'd seen some of the same things, but then, they are there to be seen, aren't they?
On that site they drew attention to something I only noticed after about the 5th viewing. In the alley, before the fight, Tyler lifts his eyes, because he hears a mother calling her son, 'Michael'. They analyzed that, as if the touchstone of his brother's name propelled Tyler to fight. It takes so many viewings to notice all the things that have been planted in the film, the symbolism. Once you notice it the film is even more meaningful.
But the first time is still the bittersweet tragedy that overwhelms so that you drown in the tidal wave of your tears and the depths of emotion. The first time, it is felt, only that. Later comes the rest…
@Jessegirl: no they don't! At least not when I watched the movie. There was nothing but total silence at the end of the movie. Everybody had to take a moment to let everything go or in, some people were crying.. It seemed like they were a little shocked..
My cousin and I were blown away by this movie.. it took me 3 days to get my usual mood back.. And I keep thinking about this movie en reading these comments here :-)
Natascha…
Sorry I didn't acknowledge your positive thoughts on my posts. I really appreciate them!
No problem ofcourse :-) Just wanted to let you know ;-)
I would like to think it's only teens that act like that. It boggles my mind that anyone would/could sit through that and not feel the impact of that scene and all of the times I went to see the movie most people were equally stunned. But a co-worker who is a big Robert Pattinson fan went to see the movie and came back to report. Now I'm not this person's friend nor she mine, but we came together briefly over our admiration for Rob. But still I was surprised when she said the movie was okay, but she said she had laughed when the camera pulled away from the towers and the screen went blank. She said she was thinking, wtf, did they really just end it this way. It made it a little better for her that it wasn't just the end but they took a look at what happened with Tyler's family. But I could tell she was not a fan of the ending. But to sit there and laugh…she didn't not catch the nuances, didn't believe in the characters, she did not get the movie at all. And I guess this is why we've never been friends. She has a totally different mindset than I do. We usually politely ignore each other. I guess we're back to that now. I would like it if I could figure out just what it is that makes some of us really connect with RM and get what they were trying to say. Like you said jessegirl, it's all there for people to see and discover. Not hidden. Not just suddenly plopped down out of the blue. Why can't others see it? *smacks head in wall*
Chris, I think people who've experienced some significant loss in life connect strongly with RM, because we know what it's like to have the heart ripped out of us, and have had to struggle to put ourselves back together.
I know that after my husband died, I spent a year feeling raw and angry at the world. It took me, I guess, 2-4 years beyond his death before I could talk about him and not automatically get emotional about him. Now, almost 11 years down the road, I can laugh about him, remember with joy the good times we had, and yes, admit that he wasn't some perfect man on a pedestal but a flawed human, just like the rest of us.
Having that experience made this film so personal to me–and I have held it in my heart deeply.
Jessegirl… maybe I didn't make this clear, the experience I've reported here is from a friend of mine, she told us about it on our discussion forum. It wasn't me, I wasn't there with her when she heard the tweens laugh, and it was she who approached that crying young man. I would not have dared to do so. She's very caring and has her personal tragedies, and I think she can connect to other wounded souls and somehow needs to.
What Chris says about her friend laughing at the end seems to confirm that it's really a question of different mind-sets and of not getting what the movie is really about, as Will Fetters says. He says in the interview that there would always be people who would never get it. Plus, if you don't connect to the characters (I can't see how you wouldn't, but apparently some viewers don't), the whole point of the movie is lost as it relies mainly on the audience connecting to the characters and learning to love them.
I also agree with Verlinda that it's easier to connect to RM if you have experienced a significant loss in life (although even preteens do love the movie! we've got a 13 year old on our discussion thread and she's incredibly mature and gets all our points). Some of these very young teens and tweens may not have been through that yet. Maybe the worst they've been through in life is the loss of their cat or dog… so they don't get it. Yet. But one day they will…
I think that ultimately it's all about getting what the movie is about. If you don't, then yes, you won't be able to understand or accept the ending at all.
Chris…
It is all there. All I can gather at this point of rumination is that, even the greats of all time cannot seem to 'speak' to all people all of the time. One of my son's best friends–and now mine–a sensitive, astute young woman–can't stand Shakespeare. Even with art of the highest calibre, even art which beautifully demonstrates the universal, cannot reach everyone.
We who love this movie, because we 'get it', because we come to love the characters, don't understand why everyone else doesn't love it. But all art, in the end, contends with the same thing. One day our friend or family member will enthuse about a book or movie that leaves us cold. They will not understand how we couldn't love it.
This is no reflection on the art, nor is it always due to the deficiencies in the reader/viewer.
When 'we' began discussions of RM, I think we were upset mainly with the assinine critics who had prejudiced agendas and with a public which didn't give RM a chance.
Now we–or I at least–seem to not understand why everyone can't love it as we do. We have come to a very different place but perhaps need some perspective ourselves–myself.
Verlina… The connection of loss puts us in an exclusinve club, one we don't want to be part of, but because we are in it, we need or connect with things many–not all–who aren't in the club just don't.
Kim…I think you made it clear that your forum story came from another but I must have missed that. Good story though. And yes, if you don't love the characters in a character-driven movie the point will be lost, the impact dulled. Again, those of us who love them WANT others, especially those we love, to also love the film, because we can all then connect amongst ourselves the way we'd like.
I reiterate: I don't think it is very hard to 'get it'. It's all there. But if you're not really paying attention because you want to impress the friends you're going with, to appear 'cool', you won't get it, or care.
And, even though I still think–as you, Chris, Verlina and others do–that having experienced gut-wrenching loss in life attunes people to this film, some 'survivors' of this type of emotional devastation are at a point in their grief that they cannot deal with the film's message yet.
Back to the teens. I know for sure my son would have loved this film and gotten it when in his teens. Absolutely. Because he was an old soul. There are other teens like that. You talked about the 13 yr. old on your discussion thread, Kim; there are others like that out there. I, myself, would have been one of them as a teen. But they are not in the majority.
And actually, even though I, myself, have said that perhaps one of the reasons teens don't get it is that they haven't suffered a personal loss, I still think that EVERYONE can connect with the tragic and will cry when a movie/book character dies. I had an intense sense of the tragic in life–from art–all through my life and I'm not that unusual. So, you don't need to have experienced loss. The human imagination is a potent thing. You only need to imagine it, -as actors do, by the way. And I think all humans are born with a sense of the tragic, recognize it, respond to it immensely.
Will has suffered something and his story has come out of that. Robert, as far as I know, has not, and his sensitivity comes from his old soul, of that I am certain. They needed to do this film and I, for one, am damn glad they did.
Spelling errors: Geez.
*Verlinda* -sorry!
*asinine*
*exclusive*
I blame it on the little box.
Jessegirl, just a short message – I've translated the interview into French and will soon be posting it on our French discussion thread – people are really eager to discover it!
That is terrific!!!!
Interview posted, yay ! – people are reading it just now – I am reporting in real time actually – and are beginning to react to it. You will be happy to know that they totally get it and that they feel the same as everyone here in this thread. No, to be more accurate, they had got it before reading the interview, an dthe interview is now just confirming that they had correctly found out for themselves what the film was about. And now some want to write to Will Fetters to support him!
Way to go, girl! Putting those multilanguage skills to good use. Brava *claps* to you for spreading the word!
Dare I ask: do any of them have anything to say about the laughing?
@jessegirl – yes, they were all very indignant about people laughing. They can understand if people let out a short, nervous laugh out of incredulity or because they feel stunned, because that's one the many human possible reactions to shock, but they don't accept why anyone should laugh to make fun of the film or the plot or the event itself. What I am going to say here may be a bit harsh to hear, but I did overhear several times young people commenting somethink like "with those Americans it's always about 9/11, the don't get over it, it's so boring, so cliché"… yes, I know, it's awful, but you do hear this type of cynical comments, although it's only a minority, thank God. Everyone on my thread was appalled, I can tell you. Personnally, I find it very difficult to cope with such reactions.
Kim…Thanks for the up-date. Oh well, what can I say?
I'm glad the people on your thread were indignant.
But the others. First of all, it's interesting that they say "it's always about 9/11", when actually, as far as I know, this is the first fictionalized–not a dramatization–story set around the event. Which is why the outrage from critics in the first place, right? (I'm disregarding the 'tacked on' objection for the time being.) So, in point of fact, 'it' is not always about 9/11. It's rarely so, therefore, to call it a cliche is just silly.
And to say things like 'why don't they get over it?' is, yes, harsh, but also inhumane. If the people who said this were quite young, they can be forgiven their ignorance I suppose. But anyone who has suffered a personal loss does not 'get over it'. Healing, hopefully, will happen but certain things we don't get over.
And a national tragedy such as this one is still a tender wound after only 9 years. How many films about the French Resistance were made, portraying the French freedom fighters as heroes (including Casablanca)? So that is just plain anti-Americanism at work, and, in that context, isn't against the film per se.
But America must be careful about its attitude towards tragedies in other countries, esp. terrorits ones, not to ignore them or minimize the horrific effects of them on the citizens of those nations. It's a two-way street.
We all know about Columbine but who remembers Dunblane or the Montreal Massacre?. Who remembers Lockerbie?
I'm not trying to stir the pot, just to understand where such callousness might come from. But it is still callous, nonetheless.
Thanks, Kim. I really appreciate the feedback.
xo
Yes jessegirl, you nailed it, it's plain anti-Americanism. Those I heard commenting this were very young people (a bunhc of male tweens and a pair of very young couples). However, I don't think they meant that "it was always about 9/11" in American works of fiction, I think they meant "in real life, in the news, in American politics, in American society". To them it's a rehashed theme, they have grown tired of it. But their comments were nevertheless strangely heartless. If we had had a similar, recent huge tragedy like this in France, I doubt they would have the same attitude. Ad of course, these commenters had clearly disliked the film anyway. I'm sorry to report it such ugly, disrecpectful comments, but I wanted to be honest and I thought you guys should know…
Will, I am so glad you got the chance to talk more about your movie. I spoke at length with someone who worked on the movie with Allen, and I know your motivation is just as described. A wonderful script, a wonderful idea. Movie goers were much more ready for this movie and the topic than critics gave them credit for. The legacy on this movie will not be Rotten Tomato's critics rating, believe me! Thank you for any role you had in choosing/supporting Rob Pattinson in this film, he was up to the job, many of us knew it, he just needed the chance. The ending was beautifully done. A tribute. I lived near the Pentagon that day, I did not lose anyone personally, but it really affected out community, and we don't feel safe like we used to here. But we all carry on. Thank you for this tribute to those lost, and the feelings of their families. And for just making a movie that makes you FEEL– I haven't felt so strongly about a movie in years. A really emotionally rich movie. I saw it five times, every time, more satisfaction in the experience.
Anyone know when and where one can buy the RM score, by Marcelo Zarvos (not the soundtrack, with the songs)?
I know it's on itunes but some of us want a CD.
I've just spent a few hours (!that's how long it takes) really reading all these comments. Of course I'd read quite a number already but I joined well into the game and added my first comments before I'd properly read the first few hundred.
What you just said, Veronica, about not having felt so strongly about a movie in years, is a recurrent thought.
So many people have mentioned going back again and again.
It's almost a mantra.
Why? To see "his royal hotness, Rob"? Well, let's face it, that doesn't hurt. The beauty of the visible.
But, but,..there's an invisible pull, a yearning for that which surpasses all the wonderful parts everyone has talked about–namely, the acting, directing, story, music, theme, etc. There's a healing property within it, and if the film 'speaks' to you, you will return to drink at that spring, the source of transformation.
This property is, I'm almost sure, an unintended one.
But, because the filmmakers proceeded from faith in it and tried their best, that sacred thing happened.
It infuses the whole thing, and now there's a glow which permeates the film, from beginning to end, and which cannot be accounted for. It is felt, just felt.
Actually, I think, if Will, Allen, Rob and the others read this, they'd perhaps laugh. What the heck is that woman talking about?
But why, then, guys, does it haunt?
Because, you see, the other prevalent thing I noticed was that so many people said it 'haunted' them. They couldn't stop thinking about it; it stayed with them for days, weeks; they had a hard time sleeping. And so on.
People who have lost loved ones in 9/11, who've lost people dear to them–myself included–who've been in terrorist attacks (another site), who need to repair relationships with significant others. Those people.
Anyone who needs healing and who is ready will come again and again and allow the radiance of this film to penetrate them. They know something significant happens inside them when they see it, and, until it has done its work, they will return.
During this time period they might experience a recurrence of their personal grief, perhaps a major one. It is a trigger, hence the tears, the sobbing. At some point they might be able to smile serenely like Ally at the end. Maybe. But, whatever the end result, they know they need the film. It is some wisdom working internally, and the film is a catalyst.
I think, these days, unless we court it, the wisdom inside each of us is hard to tap into. We are surrounded with so much that is shallow, or fanatical, or corrupt in the greater society and what courts us is greed, insecurity, stresses and the like. When wisdom suddenly appears we are shocked for its tap on the shoulder is as staggering as the end of the film. When wisdom is combined with the touch of healing love, we are stunned. We sit in our seats, paralyzed with shock and awe. Yeah, this film has its very own specific shock…..and it is awe-inspiring.
Went off on a little tangent there.
Glad no one is reviewing me. ;)
@jessiegirl,
You are a breath of fresh air on these posts. When I read any post involving Robert most of the comments are the same, i.e. "OMG he is amazing, he is awesome, I can hardly wait to see (whatever film he is going to be in)", and some are even quite vulgar, which really doesn't bother me but it adds nothing to the subject they are commenting on.
I wish you had been one of the many critics who reviewed Remember Me because I am certain more people would have at least been curious to see this fine film. I am definitely with you regarding the critics giving it such bad reviews and not having a clue as to the power this movie has to move many people who have seen it. I am certain if Will Fetters reads these posts he is most impressed with all your comments and how the movie can change and move people.
I want to thank our International fans of Remember Me for giving this film better reviews and a chance to thrive.
I hope everyone has a pleasant evening. Goodnight
Thanks again, LindaL…
I hope what we've all done here is of some solace and perhaps of some little influence.
The international audiences have been great!
I want to thank the international fans too. Without those guys turning out to see Remember me it could have truly been called a failure, but because of them we can saw with all sincerely it is a success. (I don't care who you are.) Of course all of us here know that it has always been a success regardless of box office, because, well, we're here talking about it, and when was the last time you did that a month after a movie came out?
Jessegirl, you are amazing. I love listening to you talk about the film. You say everything I'd like to say but just can't find the way. You're right again though. Remember Me does haunt. At least it does if you 'get it'. And you don't have to have anything traumatic in your past or know that kind of horrible loss intimately to appreciate the movie either. Knock on wood, I've never had those life-altering events knock me to the ground. The closest I could say I came was when my ex Marine son was in Iraq for seven months. Some of the worse conditions ever. For seven months I hated to hear the phone ring, or a car drive up in the drive way. I learned later it's a common phenomenon for parents of vets to have little mini episodes of imagining their child's death and grieve for them sort of as a way to prepare themselves for the worse. Try doing that constantly for months on end. Maybe that was enough to help me emotionally connect with RM, I don't know.
I just know that I totally fell in love with this small indie film that I would never have gone seen if it weren't for Robert Pattinson. I've never been the type to go see movies just because an actor is in it so this was unusual for me. But I really needed to see him in something besides Twilight so I screwed up my courage to go, but I wasn't really looking forward to it. I'd already seen the bad reviews and was just hoping for the best. And I was totally gobsmacked. And here I am still searching for anything I can find about it. It has such depth and such power. I keep think that they should show this to people in therapy or in schools as a teaching tool. It's just that good. I don't know if the makers of the film intended all that it is, but somehow it happened and I'm very grateful. To them for making it and to everyone here that has made me feel less foolish for liking RM so much. You guys rock.
@Chris
thanks for your great comments about this movie, I totally get what you are saying. You're right it has been over a month and this movie just lingers on in my mind. Don't feel foolish for liking this movie because it is an awesome movie. I was watching an interview with Robert and he said that he just hopes that people like it and if Twilight or Lost are the reason that you come to see the movie then that's great but I hope that you like the movie on it's own after that!!! He is right, I went because it was Robert Pattinson, I had an idea that he could act but I was blown away at what a great actor he has become. He is a very old soul, if you have a chance you should check out the interviews that Will, Allen and Robert did on iTunes. They did a Remember Me podcast. It was very insightful.
I could't agree more :-) I'm checking out that interview :-)
Thanks for the tip!
@ Chris: To be honest.. i actually went to see this movie at first because Robert was in it. He has something that draws me into it.. And I didn't read any of the comments about the movie before I went to see this movie. I was blown away by it..
Obviously Robert is gorgeous to look at ;-) Can't deny that.. but he is such a good actor. You feel Tyler in this movie.. his struggles, his pain, the love for his sister. And you hear the emotion in his voice. I never went to a movie to see an actor before.. there was never one interesting enough.. but he is such a good actor.. that I really want to see more movies he is in.. and I hope they will be just as good as this one.. :-) It is so unfair that people just critise him because of Twilight, there is so much more to this guy..
RM is an amazing movie.. I love it, I still think about and really want to see it again. I really enjoy everything everybody writes here.. I love you discuss this movie and I am so glad that you guys get is :-) You guys are great company haha ;-)
PS: I'm sorry if my English isn't perfect, but I'm still Dutch ;-)
Thanks, Chris.
Yes, those international fans are fantastic.
I didn't mean to imply that people that had NOT suffered a major loss were the only ones deeply affected, only that they would be, probably, more likely to be. I think I said that somewhere, at that point mentioning the imagination, which is key, but forgetting the human sensibilities we are all, I think, born with, that is, the ability to sympathize, empathize, just recognize pain and help.
However, your personal experience, which I just now am aware of, is a very stressful one. I can imagine–you see, we use that word–but I cannot know first-hand what you go through waiting when you know your son is in a war-zone. Of course, you know I am all too familiar with excruciating waiting, in another context.
Thanks for the fine company in this discussion thread.
Wow I see a lot of little mistakes in my writing in my last comment.. sorry about that..
Sometimes I just want to write something too fast ;-)
Natascha,
If I acknowledged every one of my mistakes, this thread would be a boring litany.
Now that's a good use of the word 'boring', Kim! RM can't be accused of that. (See post above.)
I just saw Remember Me again, this will be my 5th time. It actually hit me so much harder this time….maybe because some time has passed, I don't know. It still is such an amazing movie. I don't know if it is a movie that you can say I LOVE it but it certainly is a movie that I want to see over and over again. It is so pure and true and mind blowing. I just want to say to anyone that is reading this blog that is from New York, I am so sorry for your losses. I am so sorry that this horrible tragedy had to happen to you. I will never understand why but I can only hope that it never happpens again. The part that got me tonight was when Tyler goes to his father's office and he is so upset and his dad starts telling him that he doesn't know the first thing about love and what it means and the look on Tyler's face is so sad, because his father's words are killing him inside. I remember feeling that way once when older people didn't validate your pain because you were young. Now as an adult in my late 30's, I never want to be the reason that someone feels that way. I am so glad that we have this place to come to be able to write out our feelings. Thanks and goodnight my "Friends"…..yes, I do feel that way.
That part is so sad.. because Tyler thinks in that way about his dad..
I still want to this movie again so bad, it gave me so much to think about, but nobody will come with me :-(
And I don't want to go alone, because I'm afraid it will hit me harder this time, just as you say..
This movie made me think so much about all kinds of things.. the relationship I have with my parents, brother.. How I live my life and how I want to live it..
Just inspiring..
It's nice to have someplace to talk about RM isn't it? There is a nice board over at the RM IMDB board that seems to have a few people still around and talking. You might try that. I saw RM four times at the theater, 3 times by myself and I want to see it again, but it's been gone for a while. I'm just counting down the days for the dvd.
Okay, this will make it 300 comments. Not that I was shooting for it, but it'll be kind of cool, don't you think, ladies (and any men lurking here)?
Kelli,
I know exactly what you mean when Charles tells Tyler he doesn't know what love is. That was harsh, unfair and cruel. Tyler was torn up by that comment. I thought he'd burst out crying, right there in front of all those business execs.
Anyone got any ideas on why Charles was so adamant that all those people remain there to witness that altercation? 'Sit the f*ck down!' Whoa! Did he need them as a buffer so that he wouldn't have to face Tyler alone? Was he afraid he and Tyler might have it out and end up embracing, that he'd actually show his remaining, tortured son some love? Was Charles so very afraid of breaking down himself? I think so.
Right after that, didn't Tyler say: 'you didn't find him'…I found him? Imagine being 15 or so and finding the hung body of your brother! Talk about PTS. He needs love, damn it.
When we lost our son there were no remaining children.
Therefore, how a father or mother would relate to remaining children is not something I've experienced. But all of them must feel guilt since suicide was involved, and guilt can do ugly things to people.
Still, my failing would be like the mother's. I'd be clingy and broken. Then, later, to lose Tyler too, which would be the ultimate loss, I don't know if I could go on.
Now THAT particular grief would be too devastating and no film I've seen could handle that well. Indeed, I've said it elsewhere but the one failing of this film is that it didn't illustrate enough Tyler's relationship to his mother, nor her own agony. I think Will didn't know how to handle that. It was lacking, though, and as a mother who has lost a 20 yr. old son tragically I know that.
Chris,
It's been so nice to discuss this all with you, and with all the other diehards. Thank you.
Natascha,
Go again, by yourself if you need to.
If you need it, and it's still around, go. Many who want to haven't got the luxury of still finding it at the theatre.
Last time I went, in the afternoon, there was only one other person in the theatre, and I'm sure she was a 'repeater', someone who needed to go again.
I've never seen such a huge demonstration of people NEEDING to see the movie again. Something about it speaks to us like few other films have.
Sigh…The beauty and heartbreak and the ability to touch us at our core. Man, what a film. Sigh…
Jessiegirl, Kelli and all of you:
I think I can understand why Charles tells Tyler he doesn’t know what love is being surrounded by his business execs…He has been suffering over Michael’s death but not expressing his feeling over the loss. His attitude towards his children is that he loves them and will support them and keep very busy…His wife obviously has remarried. His little girl is talented and he is too busy to spend too much time with her or with Tyler…I think the pain of being with his children makes him deal with the why did Michael kill himself and if perhaps he was to blame. I do feel his guilt over his son’s death has distanced himself from his children by his reactions towards them… In reality he could of canceled the meeting and gone to the art show for ten minutes. He could of let Caroline tell him about her being asked to be in the art show…He could have been happy to see that Tyler did go to the yearly Memorial for his brother instead of telling him you should of worn a tie. He could of asked Tyler what happened that he ended up in jail and if things are going well in his life…instead it was a money issue that Tyler brought up and wanted to repay which caused more tension between the father and son.
Charles being the successful Executive that he is didn’t want his son to think he was going to be pinned by his dramatic entrance and demands so he confronted his son in front of his colleagues probably expecting Tyler to back down but he didn’t. Of course words were said and Tyler’s anger surfaced along with the pain he suffered finding his brother dead and felt that he and his sister could hang themselves and it would be okay with his Father— as he felt they were not that important to him….If we all go back to the morning Tyler goes to Charles’ office we see the pictures of a happy family on his Monitor screen which shows that at one time Charles was very involved with his kids. I think Michael’s death made Charles become alienated from his family as he hadn’t confronted his grief. If we recall a few comments made in the story indicated that Tyler and his Father were into Falconry and that Charles took him dressed as a favorite ballplayer for Halloween. I think Charles never talked to his son about finding his brother dead or how his death had impacted all of them which was very sad but unfortunately is a more common reaction than not. Charles behavior sheltered him from becoming emotionally involved with his kids for fear he would lose them. Four years ago my cousin’s son committed suicide a couple of weeks before he was to graduate with high honors from college. His Mother has been completely devastated by his death. My cousin has put all his energy into his work and just recently is he openly talking about his son and the things they did .together. His daughter is very angry over her brother’s death and has been going for help because of this. It’s very sad and we never know how we will accept things or when we will accept things. I feel that Charles behavior was very
much like a parent who lost his child and didn’t know how to reach out and express his grief…It wasn’t until Caroline had her haircut by the mean girls and Tyler’s behavior to protect her that he finally embraced his children knowing he had to be a part of their lives and made peace with his son.
Jen…thx for your thoughts on the confrontation scene and for Charles' side of the story. Sorry about your cousin's loss.
I think grief is the yet to be discovered country in all of our lives. More than sex–which our society has more than covered–death and its attendant grief are huge, often unspoken issues in our world.
When my son died I read a lot of grief literature, both for grievers and by them and now I'm reading one by a 9/11 widow. And one thing I discovered was that the books written most recently 'got it' better than the earlier ones. So, there's a progression of knowledge about how grief works. There's a lot to learn still. We've just begun.
That said, it's still a very individual thing, even years later. We meet Tyler's family 6 years after Michael's death and we see how they still have not come to terms with it. And, according to the books I read, parents never 'get over' the loss of a child. That is true.
I think our complexity as human beings is revealed when we grieve. Because each of us faces our own mortality, the loss of someone we love–love doesn't stop. We re-evaluate our values, what is important to us, our purpose in life, the purpose of tragic deaths. We ponder everything to the core, looking at it differently. Everything.
We begin to care about certain things more, and to stop caring about other things. There is always a great divide, before and after. Before he died and after. I see the world that way now.
I think Remember Me has opened up the floodgates on the issue of grief for a lot of people and they are beginning to talk and think about it in different ways–like you are about your cousin's family?–and I think that is one of the outstanding things about this film. I talked about this in my April 23 comments. The 'haunting' quality of RM is so significant in film history. Perhaps, on the issue of grieving, in hindsight, people will talk about before and after Remember Me.
@jessegirl and everyone:
People who've suffered a loss never get over it; most get through it, and that is a journey as unique as each of us. I think part of the reason that some audiences, particularly American ones, have struggled with this film is that our culture doesn't acknowledge or "do" loss. After a death, there's a period beyond which people (even your friends) no longer want to hear about your brokenness, your anger, your pain, your sorrow. Not hearing about it makes it easier to deny that loss will one day affect them and potentially cause them that pain.
Perhaps part of this is that as a nation/culture, we're relatively young, and up until very recent history, have felt extraordinarily secure in our own identity and strength.
Yes, this is a haunting film–and ultimately a hopeful one. It's made me relive some of the emotions/feelings immediately following Darrell's death, but with the benefit of the 10+ years since that event, it's also enabled me to appreciate more deeply what we shared together as husband/wife and friends, and to work at living more intentionally every day.
I think you're so right about both the journey of grief and the American response to it.
Yes, people are quick to want you to go back to normal. My own sister, two years after my son's death, tersely asked, 'Aren't you over it yet?'. Funnily, she wasn't someone I'd actually leaned on or 'burdened' with much talk about it at all. Her attitude stunned me.
There were a number of other significant instances of close famiy members' callousness which exacerbated my already overwhelming pain.
Thank you for allowing us a glimpse of a very personal part of your life.
I am still very connected to this site and comments regarding RM. I read each new comment and return to those previously written. I am sure this movie and it's message will continue to haunt me for a very long time. My father always told me I wear my heart on my sleeve and I feel so much sympathy for each of your losses and empathy for some.
Losing a child must be the most heart breaking of all. A young woman I was very close to was brutally murdered by someone she had know since high school. For some reason this has brought all the feelings right to the surface again. I am totally interested in each comment. I have had many other losses. As you get older, that happens.
Erma Jo…as I said, our eternal flame…whenever this thread ends, I think you should have the last word…just give me the heads-up because, as everyone can tell, I'm libel to just go on and on. Although I thought I was done some days ago.
Reading the comments, I realize how much people suffer with this kind of pain. I mean, intellectually and rationally, we all know that, because people die every day, but when you hear so many stories, it really hits home. You see, your story about your friend's murder is one. That is hard.
While not minimizing anyone else's pain, I think it's interesting that in the English language we have words for those who have lost their parents–orphan–and those who have lost spouses–widow, widower–but there is no word for those who have lost their children. Why not?
True enough, there's no word for sibling loss either.
But child loss? For some reason the language doesn't want to go there.
@jessegirl–I suspect one reason there's no word in the English language for loss of one's child is that children are supposed to lose their parents, rather than the other way around.
I remember thinking how hard it must have been for Darrell's mother (in RL) and for Tyler's mom (in RM) to bury their children, rather than vice versa. It's just not the "natural" order of things.
Thank you for your sharing, honesty and insights–it's a privilege to have "met" all of you through this film.
Jessiegirl, Thx for your condolences on my cousin and my thoughts about Charles’ side of the story.
I would like to offer my condolences on the loss of your son and your ability to share your sorrow and grief over his loss. I am sure your book will touch many hearts and open the gate for other parents to come forward with this most tragic and heartbreaking journey that only those who have lost a child have traveled on.
Yes, grief is something that we tend to put on a shelf and leave it there for fear we’re going to open Pandora’s box and sadly some people never open the box and confront their sorrow but continue going through life as though it didn’t happen.
I agree with you I think today we are more open to talk about grief and that people are more inclined to share their experiences and I think that is a good thing. I can’t imagine a parent ever getting over the loss of their child be the child an infant or an adult that is still your child and part of the dream you had for them goes unfulfilled and it must be so hard to know that the chapter you started was interrupted and never able to be finished.
Yes, when we lose our loved ones the way we grieve and perceive things is forever changed. I know losing my parents was a lesson on learning how to let go of them and go forward with my life and decide what truly is important to me and what isn’t and your right we are changed forever.
I totally agree with you about RM opening the floodgates about grief for so many people and I am glad this movie was made because it did make people become really aware that when you lose a loved one life is changed forever. In the story we were dealing with the grief from Ally’s father and herself to the Hawkins family it was a journey they all took and had to deal with in their own way. It was haunting and it touched my heart forever.
Just a little anecdote – I'm taking my 15 year old niece this afternoon to see RM – first time for her. I wonder how she will react, I'm somehow afraid that it will be too much grief for her… I will keep in touch and report later.
My niece loved the film but unfortunately did not get the ending… she thought Tyler had committed suicide and did not understand why or how. Had he jumped out of the window?She was confused. It's true that she was only 6 when 9/11 happened. I had to explain it to her. She then remembered her parents talking about it and vaguely seeing something on the news, but nothing else. But the good thing about all this is that she asked me about a million questions about 9/11 when we went out of the theater. She wanted details, as kids and teens often do -it might sound a bit gruesome- but I tried to explain it to her in the most decent way possible. She did not know that the towers had been hit by planes, she thought there had been a bomb. When I told her about the planes, she asked if they were military planes manned by terrorists only and I had to explain that they were normal planes and that all the passengers died this terrible death. I had to explain how and when the towers were hit, what happened, the firestorm, the people trapped in the upper parts, the firemen who died trying to help, and the towers collapsing so quickly, the ashes falling over new York, people in the street looking up in horror (she had not really noticed the ashes in the film and could see something was wrong with so many people looking up, but did not understand why). It was painful to me to explain all this but I felt it was useful as she did not know anything. Anything at all- and she listened to me so very carefully. It was hard for her to take it all in, to imagine the victims' fate, to accept that 3000 lives were lost on that day, after seeing it embodied by Tyler in the film, but she needed to know. She was very moved and interested by what I could tell her of the tragedy and now she wants to know more : who were the terrorists, why they acted like this; she wants to understand the political, religious and historical reasons, the war consequences; and she wants to know more about the individual stories of all those who were lost.
On a lighter note, she was completely gripped by the film and loved it. She walked in it totally unspoiled: she had only seen the French trailer and read nothing about it. I had just warned her it was a sad film, that could expect trailer and the official synopsis were misleading, and that the opening scene was brutal as in a typical TV police series. But when before we went in, her main concern was to know if Tyler and Ally would end up together as a happy couple. So you see, she did not get the rom-com she was expecting, but she loved the film nonetheless. She's a tough little girl though, not the crying kind, not very expresive, she does show her feelings much, either laughing or weeping, so I only know she really loved the film because she told me so repeatedly.
That was my afternoon RM session with an unknowing European teen girl… do we need anything more to prove that it is necessary to remember? And that a film like Remember me is necessary to help us remember?
No, Kim, that's all we need to prove it is necessary to remember. She sounds like a great young woman. No wonder she'd be confused because why would Tyler, his life having turned a significant corner, kill himself? Thank you for filling her in on such a painful topic. I wonder how many other teens don't know.
Thanks to everyone who took the time to comment. I am still reading them all. Kim – I found your comment about how your unspoilered 15 year old neice responded very interesting.
I hope we still will come back here to discuss it :-)
Natascha…I've said too much already, but I do check back and am always interested in what you all have to say.
Everyone…
Brevet has, on this site, a post about the next Academy Awards and possible movies. I looked at it and Remember Me is not one of the films mentioned. There's a comment board there too, and I briefly put my $1.50 worth in there. I want someone to start talking about RM and Oscar often, and in the same breath. I don't know how these things work, and, given that it got such poor reviews, I don't know how much credence anyone will give our opinions, but I thought maybe we can get this train rolling.
So, I suggest all of you who are still reading here go to that post and make your voice heard. And, if anyone has any other ideas on how to generate Oscar buzz from our lowly grass roots place, let me know. That's my new mission.
Anyone on board? Ideas?
Thanks for the info, Jessegirl. I'll go to the site and add my comments this week.
I do know that some studios will run Oscar "campaigns" for a movie; not sure what Summit would do, but sending an email to them might be another option.
Couldn?t be written any better. Reading this register reminds me of my old stay associate! He every kept talking about this. I desire forward this article to him. Pulchritudinous steady he choice have a tolerable read. Thanks for sharing!
Since my first comment here I've seen Remember me 3 times, and my 16-year old daughter 4 times. Robert Pattinson was the reason we went to the theatre, but I have to say that I adore the movie, he exceeded my expectations and he becomes more beautiful each time I see him. My daughter told me, for her Remember me is one of the most beautiful movies she's ever seen. She knew immediatly what the ending was about and sobbed at lot. She was more silent than usual for days. I saw her looking at youtube films of 9/11 with teared eyes. She asked me a lot about that terrific day: what we were doing, how everyone reacted and I told her that here in Europe everyone was extremely upset about such an immense attack against humanity) and we all felt for the New York citizens. She even asked her grandmum how it was for her being 17 when WWII broke out. In school she was teached about 9/11 but she said that only now, after seeing Remember me, she could 'feel' the impact it had on the thousands of ordinary people in New York. Next schoolyear (when the dvd is out) she'll surely ask her teachers in high school to show the movie as she's convinced that every student has to see this little masterpiece.
So:
to those reviewers who earned their money easily while smashing a movie with only a few words and without any form of tact: you provoked a wave of solidarity all over the net on many sites and after each article about RM, a solidarity so strong and moving that this reaction alone already means that the movie is a success.
to Jessegirl, Kim and all the others here who shared their opinions and their personal tragedies: I bow my head in deep respect for you. Trying to help, in my job, people with emotional issues as loss, grieve I know of the lonelyness it brings even when you are supported by people around you. After a while, life goes on but you have to keep going on with the hole in your breast and the eternal shadow. Even after so many years I'm not used at this kind of tragedy. Each time I hear my patients telling about their loss, I'm speachless. There are no right words, our language is too poor, to enlighten the suffering.
to Brad: thanks for trying to be a responsible reviewer. I didn't know you before but I know now where to look when I need a descent review of a movie.
to Will, Allen, the magnificent cast and crew: thanks for daring to make a risky film, for believing that this story had to be told, you were so right. I can only hope that one day RM will have the recognition it deserves. Until then know that many many people really appreciate your project.
to Rob: thanks for…ya, how shall I say this, thanks for…just being Rob, our Rob.
Reading your comment, Anne, brought a renewed ache in my heart and tears to my eyes. I cannot wait to own this movie. I put it out on Facebook encouraging people to go see it for themselves. We should never let critics decide what we should see.
Thanks, Erma Jo, and I meant of course a hole in your chest in stead of a hole in your breast. My knowlegde of English often fails but better an opinion with mistakes than not one at all, isn't it?
I think you commented beautifully!!!
Okay, I thought we were done here, but I see that's not the case. Anne, great comment and thanks for your concern. Your English is fine.
Chris–still around?–Jen, Erma Jo and anyone else who wants to pursue more discussion about Remember Me, there is a blog that is fantastic, which I will point you to:
http://www.rememberme-film.com
I'm heading there in a minute myself.
On this blog people are analyzing the movie. Right now, every day before the DVD comes out, there is a 'countdown quot' from the film, and we comment on it. Wow! The comments there, by a small segment but a very articulate and insightful one, are really good.
I suggest, when you get there, that you also scroll backwards to previous countdown quotes to catch up. Really fascinating comments and dialogue! I particularly loved quote #55 and #48, which are about Tyler's conflict with Charles.
Periodically there are also analyses which the blog administrator has put up, things like talkint about the art, themes like memories and remembrance, and so on. Really, go and check it out.
Lars, Anne, I'm so glad the European contingent is making its voice heard here as well.
Jessicagirl,
Did hope over to the rememberme-film.com and left a post.
I will go back and finish posting…I am late and hope they still read the posts. LOL…Jen
Great, Jen. Saw it at the time but stupidly didn't put two and two together. Math, never my strong point. lol.
I replied. You might not like the analytical cast there but I adore it. Hope to 'see' you there again.
xo
hey jessegirl, I just read the article that you wrote "Oscars and Remember Me"! awesome as usual! how ever do we get it nominated for best picture? how do we get Rob nominated for best actor???????????
I don't know, Kelli. I can only do my bit.
If others think my little article has merit, it would be great if it were posted on other good websites as well. I don't know the process of doing this. If it got onto a couple of well-used sites it might spread.
And thanks for the vote of confidence!
A friend pointed me back here, having seen your comment. Wow! I thought this thread was dead and buried.
xo
Jessegirl,
I will return and am not in the least worried about the group they are very interesting and I do enjoy them. ;)
See you around.
Jen
@jessegirl,
He will not be considered for an Oscar, however, you may have more luck with an Independent Spirit Award. I believe Summit is still considered a small studio that Remember Me may be considered an Independent film. I applaud your spirit of trying to showcase this thought provoking film. I believe Rob will be taken more seriously when the Twilight Saga is over. He will need to do what Leo DiCaprio did after Titanic. Do a couple of small films and then take a year or two off. During that year(s) he should focus on his music and take some acting classes. Those acting classes will give him more to work with so his acting technique is fluid. I believe it will be then that critics and a larger portion of the film-viewing audience will take Rob's acting seriously. He has the "it" factor and many actors do not possess that quality no matter how good their performances are in their craft. Rob gave a good performance in Remember Me, however, many people still compared him to his Twilight persona. If his management is wise they will follow that course or at least have him take some acting classes between films to reenforce his acting technique. I can see Rob winning acting awards from his peers once his performances are fluid. He has so many different facial expressions and voice patterns, he would be a natural for many film projects in his future with A-List actors and directors. He has a good start with Bill Condon in Breaking Dawn and working with Reese Witherspoon and Cristoph Waltz in Water for Elephants.
LindaL…
Yeah, you're probably right about the process and what will happen. With Rob, I mean. However, I've seen many, many films and seen actors win Oscar even when they've overacted their part. I don't think Rob thinks any of his performances worthy of awards; I think he's extremely sensitive to his lack of formal training and is terminally self-deprecating. That's my guess. And others, seeing RM, are just barely ready to admit that he can act at all. However, he owned Tyler, made that character completely his own, and he did it so well, as I said in my article, that audiences were moved, touched, crying, etc. when he died. That could not have worked without a stand-out performance. Again and again I read yet another story about men crying.
Compare Rob's performance as Tyler, which was so natural, believable yet compelling, to George Clooney's in Up in the Air (by the way a movie I enjoyed and promptly forgot). Clooney is good, but pretty much playing himself; it wasn't a stretch. But Rob was better. Rob has a natural gift even he doesn't acknowledge. Yeah, training would be good, but there's an instinctive genius there.
Whatever happens to Rob's career from here on out, it must be acknowledged that in THIS film, RM, he was not just good, but great. That's where I take my stand.
This is the only thing I knew when writing the article.
I knew the film was good enough that I had to do something to counteract the unfair weight of negativity surrounding it. I DO absolutely believe it IS good enough for Oscars, etc. No question. For me, the lasting impression, the passion and power of the reactions of so many, only validated my own gut feeling. And I think those things speak to its greatness, regardless even of what the filmmakers themselves thought they were doing.
I know, I know, none of these accolades will be in the cards no matter what I say. I'm realistic. But all it does is point to the huge failure of the 'system' to find the gems amongst the trash that regularly comes out of Hollywood. So many Oscar nods go to ordinary works, things which play into the politically correct issue of the day, or things which are sentimental favorites. I won't name any because I'm sure to cause immediate dissention. But so many of them are utterly forgettable. Ho hum.
Linda…I get it and I've done my bit to counteract the juggernaut of mediocrity for this movie. I can do no more.
Another Amen for a comment so eloquently put Jesse girl. Actually I loved Rob in Little Ashes too. My only negative thought was that he lost his accent at times. That movie also broke my heart for other reasons. I think he is a genious and of course will get even better with time. He can play many varied roles and do justice to them. He is a
precious jewel to me in the world of acting.
Jessiegirl, once again well said Tyler was Rob's role and he made him believable. I think this is why so many people have loved RM because we fell in love with him for the person he portrayed as Tyler Hawkins a lost young man dealing with the pain of his brother's death. Being angry with his father who I think he blamed and who he also wanted approval from and the love he finally found in Ally. We have seen as you said many ordinary works get awards from the echelons of the Awards committee and it's a shame they didn't really sit down and watch this movie with a good attitude instead they went in because they had to and panned it because they just didn't get it…A real shame we have these critics telling us what to see or not see. Hmm
Keep up the good work girl. I think Robert has only just begun.
Thanks Erma Jo and Jen…always so supportive!
It's about the film as a whole;
It's about what lasts.
It's about excellence;
It's about heart, never let that be forgotten.
Somewhere in my article I said it;
it's about the angel in the midst.
Yeah, yeah, over the top…..whatever…so what?
What lasts is always about the angel in the midst.
And it's there, inside Remember Me.
It'll last when the others are dust.
Yeah, yeah, I know, over the top….but true.
@jessegirl,
I stand with you that Rob gave a great performance in Remember Me and one of the reasons is the reaction in the audience. In a quiet room in the dark you could hear people crying and sniffling at the end when they realized our hero has died. No one would be crying if we were not invested in Rob's performance as Tyler. I went to see New Moon, I heard no crying, especially at the break-up scene, I don't think his acting was up to par for that performance, but I will defend Remember Me, How to Be, The Mad Mother's Handbook, The Haunted Airman, and Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, those performances were spot on.
You are a true ambassador of this film and I wish we could give you an award on how tirelessly you have worked to have people see the message and merits of this film. One day it will happen maybe not today, or the next day, or next year, but it will happen and this film will be noticed for it's message and it is because of people like you that can see a performance for what it is and not compare it to previous characters or movies.
Thanks, LindaL…ambassador? more like a voice crying in the wilderness….
No, indeed, men 16, 20 45,years old, women 14 to whatever, people who've known grief and those who can imagine it, many New Yorkers and 9/11 survivors included, weep. But not a tear-jerker. Never were we jerked around. Catharsis yeah. And a place too deep for tears.
Love ya, ladies…
xo
Hello those of you who loved Remember Me. I have my DVD and here is a link for an $8.00 coupon. Not sure if it is just in the USA???
http://www.remembermecoupon.com/?1277248189
I think you are all very special people. God Bless.
I have just watched Remember Me for the fifth time! I didn't see it at the cinema, I bought the DVD, having seen an trailer for it at the begining of another film. I didn't have any preconception of the story line, or even what the film was really about – I just thought that it was a romance & that the boy would get his girl & that they everyone would live happily ever after.
As a family we have had more than our share of pain and loss, having had 2 brothers killed in accidents, the first, on the eve of his 21st and the 2nd when he was 26 and a new dad. Maybe because of that, this film has touched me very deeply, and I feel that it's a tragedy that some people appear to be so shallow, that they just don't get what this film is all about. For me, it's been amazing, and maybe it feels so special because, after 30 years of missing my brothers, it has only just occured to me that I need to forgive them – the very last words that are spoken by Tyler – reading from his journal – were like they were written for me to tell my brothers. So I thank all involved for that.
Apart from the personal connection that the film has for me, I thought that the casting was excellent, the actors all brought thier characters to life and the balance between them all was amazing. As usual Rob was brilliant, but he didn't outshine anyone else – he just had more words to say! I loved the way that everyone interacted with each other – the relationships between them all are totally believable, I just love the way that Tyler & Caroline look after each other – after a tragedy like they experienced you do look out for each other more – basically you know that life can't be taken for granted & that you need to say and do what you need to now – because tomorrow may never come……
I want to say thank you to Will Fetters for writing the most beautiful and sensitive script, and to say that as a person living in a relatively peaceful community on a little island off the south coast of England, I'm ashamed to say that until Remember Me, 9/11 was a fact and the people that died were basically statistics. This film, for me, has achieved one of it's goals in that it has made me realise that the people who died that day were real people, and that the families that were left behind faced pain and suffering in the same way that we did. That is something that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy – your life stops, then it starts again, but nothing is ever the same, nor ever will be.
I think that the fact that Rob could see the point of the film, and that he believed in it so much that he helped to ensure that it was made and released, says a lot about his maturity and his credibility as a person and an actor.
Thank you to everyone involved in this film – I will treasure it and will come back to it time and time again.
Thank you for adding your thoughts and feelings. I appreciated reading your point of view. Sorry for your loss and pain. I am so happy Rob won for Remember Me at the Teen Choice Awards here in the USA recently.
Katrina, your comments were so beautiful and heart-felt, and clearly demonstrate the impact this film has had on people that were willing to give it a chance.
And yes, Erma Jo, I'm so happy that Rob was recognized for Remember Me–I think, judging by the expression on his face, that that honor meant a great deal to him.
I've got the dvd as soon as it was released a few days ago in my country and saw RM every day since then. I remembered all the tender comments on this site and wanted to read some back, thinking the thread was dead for a while yet. And look: there are still some new comments.
Thanks, Katrina, for sharing your personal tragedy. That is what Remember me has caused on many sites: people bonding by sharing their loss and sadness. Isn't this wonderful? People all over the world supporting each other is the best thing internet can offer.
It strikes me that you and quite some other people were touched by the forgiving words of Tyler; at the end of the film, towards his brother. I read other commenters telling that forgiveness toward the person they lost was very important in their healing process. I also read that Will Fetters had to deal with 'something' in his personal life and I can imagine why he used these words.
I so hope RM will get some more awards. In my country the movie was very highly appreciated and successful.
Sorry for English mistakes.
Anne, thank you for your comments. I am still reading the comments. Though we do not know one another, there is still a heart connection, I believe. We all have such strong feelings for this movie and what it means to each of us.
I am so happy that this site hasn't been taken down and that it is still here to allow people to grieve and love together and to make new friends. It is just awesome! I have Remember Me also on DVD and I just love listening to the commentaries by the director and by Rob Pattinson, Ruby Jerins and Nick Osborne. I love that they talk about the movie being a love letter to New York. It's just beautiful!
I was amazed to still receive comments from this board which goes to show how this movie has made such an impact on people. I own the DVD and I have watched it several times and I still can't fathom how it still brings a tear at the end when Rob's voiceover echos over the ashes and debris of that horrible day. When he says “Michael, Caroline asked me what I would say if I knew you could hear me. I said I do know: I love you. God, I miss you. And I forgive you.”. It is timeless and I am glad that it brings people closer throughout the world. There are few things that truly can bring people closer it seems like trajedy is one of those events. Future generations will appreciate this more in the USA once enough time has passed from 9/11 to fully appreciate what a little gem of a movie Robert and the filmakers have brought to cinema.
LindaL,
It's the 'ambassador' speaking. Hope you are well.
I don't know if you get notifications on this site anymore. Well, it's the second anniversary of RM's release and I wrote an article for the RM site. I'd love your impressions, as always, but thought you might be interested in what I'm thinking about it these days. My 25th article about Remember Me was just posted on the site: rememberme-film dot com. I called it: "Triumph over Tragedy in Remember Me: a new look at the ending".
Anne, ermaJo, Kelli, LindaL, I'm so glad to see this thread is still active. There are still sites out there where people go to speak about Remember me. Just type "unofficial remember fan site" in Google and you will find one very good site dedicated to the film where there is a discussion group. I'm not sure it's allowed to post links here so I don't, but you should find it easily. I'm from France, and I wanted to say we have a forum where we are still talking about the movie, every day! And we also have a blog where people share and contribute… This movie has a great power which few others have: make people share and connect. It's wonderful. Many, many of us love Remember me. It's more than a movie, it's about our lives, about how we live and die and love. That's why we're still here speaking about it, months after it's been released.
The movie may be a love letter to New York, but I also think it's a love letter to the world. It is about life–about how wonderful, and how fleeting, it can be–and how every day we make a difference. 9/11 is the event that brings it all home–but this film is so much more than that.
It's never too late to forgive, to reconcile, to be a better person, to love. For me, that's what this movie is all about.
Verlinda, how are you?
I don't know if you get notifications on this site anymore.
Well, it's the second anniversary of RM's release and I wrote an article for the RM site. I'd love your impressions, as always, but thought you might be interested in what I'm thinking about it these days. My 25th article about Remember Me was just posted on the site: rememberme-film dot com. I called it: "Triumph over Tragedy in Remember Me: a new look at the ending".
Katrina,
Thank you for sharing your story. I am very sorry for your loss. Many of us here have also suffered terrible personal losses and understand the effect this film can have. I am glad that you discovered Remember Me in DVD.
ErmaJo, Verlinda, Anne, Kelli, LindaL, and of course, Kim, it is so great to meet here again! I check every so often, and know the number of comments by heart, so when I saw 344 I knew something had happened. Anne, yes the bonding of people all over the world is wonderful.
With Kim, I wish to recommend the "Unofficial Remember Me" site. A number of us have gone there to comment and it is a very astute, intelligent and sensitive group who do so. It is far and away one of the better sites out there.
So, Katrina, if you wish to pursue Remember Me discussion, go there. We would welcome your voice.
I have a selfish reason as well, because a number of my pieces–8 actually–about the film have been posted there. You may want to comment on them as well. I'm still writing. Kat just posted my second piece about Rob as Tyler. No comments yet and I'm anxious to know what everyone thinks. And soon my piece on the character of Tyler will be out as well, followed by Tragedy in RM.
Oh, and by the way everyone, remember when we were hoping Will and some of the others who made the film heard our voices? I know for a fact that the producer, Nick Osborne, and Will Fetters have indeed heard. I cannot say more about this but they have heard and are very grateful.
Jessegirl – could you let me know how to leave a comment on the unofficial Remember Me site? I'm pretty sure now that my post didn't get where it was supposed to! Sorry to leave this message on this site but can't contact you on the other one? Do I need to sign up / be a member first?
Katrina
I'll try to show you how to leave a comment, Katrina.
I'm not sure how different it is than here.
Under the 'post a comment' they have 'comment as' and if you click that you pick your email. Things like 'google account', 'Livejournall and even 'Anonymous' come up. I have a google account so if I click it, if I'm not signed in a screen comes up to sign me in (just my email and password). Then it takes me back to the Remember Me site. I write my comment, and click 'post'. They preview it for you–takes a minute–you check it, and they have a weird alphabetical 'word' you retype in (to make sure you're not a monkey -lol). You do that, wait a few seconds, and your comment should be right there.
Here, you just leave your email and name-pen name.
For these things you ususally have to leave your email but they say it stays confidential.
If you pick Anonymous no one will know that you're 'Katrina'. If you want us to at the RM site, just write as Anonymous and say in the body. 'It's me, Katrina'.
Does anybody else here know a better way?
Jessegirl, I was able to go to the site you suggested. Really, Jesse, how will we find out about your book. You have to get published. Your commentaries on Remember Me captivate me.
Thanks, Erma Jo.
This book thing. Well, I'm procrastinating, but have to find an agent, then a publisher and it's all very much not what a writer likes to do.(Instead, I'm writing RM articles and also the sequels to my first book.) This is a big hurdle. I so much value your support and would really love it if you get my book when it's published.
Very, very few people I've 'met' on the internet have my email address. Call me paranoid and don't take it personally at all please. I, too, wonder, without giving out information, how those, like you, who enjoy my writing, will get a chance to know. If you feel comfortable giving the blog administrator for the Unofficial RM site your email it will be passed along to me. The administrator's email is at the bottom of the Disclaimer (look on the side bar).
I'm so very grateful and happy that my writing appeals to you, Erma Jo. It would be great to see your comments at the RM site too. A new discussion voice is always welcome, esp. one as dedicated as your.
xo
j
Erma Jo!
Do you still get notifications from this site? I hope so. I hope you've been well. Well, it's the second anniversary of RM's release and I wrote an article for the RM site. I'd love your impressions, as always, but thought you might be interested in what I'm thinking about it these days. My
25th article about Remember Me was just posted on the site: rememberme-film dot com. I called it: "Triumph over Tragedy in Remember Me: a new look at the ending".
Jessegirl
Thank you for your post – I have been onto the unofficial Remember Me site and Have left a comment, but am unsure if it has been received ok, as I can't see it on the site yet – I hope so.
When I found this site, my objective was to find some way of reaching Will Fetters to say thank you for the script. I appreciate that Rob Pattison was a brilliant in this film, but it may well have been made, another equally handsome and talented actor championed it's cause, it would have been a different film, but still could have been made. But without the script in the first place there would have been nothing to make – so my biggest thank you goes to Will and to those who got the film made (and that includes Rob) I'm happy to hear that they have heard our voices. They need to know what an impact they have had.
I do agree that Rob is a naturally talented actor, he expresses himself so well, using body language and facial expressions to fill the gaps where words alone just wont do. I love the relationship between Tyler and Caroline – just as it should be.
Still loving the film – and watching it too.
Katrina,
Don't know if you still visit the RM site, or get notifications on new comments here. It's been so long.
Just a note to let you know that my 25th article about Remember Me was just posted on the site: rememberme-film dot com.
It is to mark the 2nd anniversary of RM's American release.
I called it: "Triumph over Tragedy in Remember Me: a new look at the ending".
Just have to say: Jessegirl has written the most insightful, detailed, heartwrenching comments, and commentaries, on this movie over anyone else I've seen. She has been able, somehow, to put into words what this movie made so many people feel, how and why it moved them, and pinpoint it completely.
To know now that Will Fetters has somehow seen the commentary, by her and by others like the rest of us, fills me with contentment and satisfaction.
For anyone who has been touched by this movie, you really need to go to the Unofficial Remember Me website and see her articles. Powerful stuff. To say she is a gifted writer is an understatement.
Jen!
How are you?
I hope you still get notifications on this thread.Just a note to let you know that my 25th article about Remember Me was just posted on the site: rememberme-film dot com.
It is to mark the 2nd anniversary of RM's American release.
I called it: "Triumph over Tragedy in Remember Me: a new look at the ending".
Hope you go over to read it. I'd love your impressions!
j
Jennifer L.
Man, THANKS so much for your beautiful words and support! You cannot know how much it means to me. I'm just following my heart and, I suppose, it is my way to give back to the filmmakers, but also to deal with my loss. I will continue as long as my blog master wants my words and as long as they flow. It is instinctive and when it has served its purpose, will end.
I'm trying, in my small way, to get positive word out about RM as broadly as possible. Still a very tiny fish. Unless lots of really huge Rob sites pick up my articles–or comments by lots of regular people on anything RM related–it's still less exposure as RM needs. So many people are still making ignorant comments on other sites. And Rob and Kristen's lives can be a nightmare with those vile paps hounding them. Those two HAVE to stay removed, and paranoia would actually help them at the moment. That's the world we live in.
I love interacting with you Jen.
j
Jessegirl, as usual I am enjoying your commentaries and know that there is so much more you can share with us where this movie Remember Me is concerned. I sincerely hope that
Will Ferris and the directors and actors are aware of your wonderful writings and opinions you have shared with us. I can imagine your eloquent words have eased the pain for many of our 9/11 families who are still trying to endure the loss of their loved one and are reading your words and finding some comfort in the loving words and thoughts you have offered to us with the insight of your personal loss and Hope.
I am Jen not JenniferL incase you were making the comment to me on interacting I've enjoyed interacting with you also on this site as well as the unoffical remember me site. ;)
Oh dear, Jen, I'm sorry if I mistook you.
But you and I have discussed as well I know.
Oh I hope the 9/11 families will take heart but that is not something I ever attempted. That is a diffictult task. That seeing Remember Me helped them in some way is the thing. And from the comments, I know it has helped some people.
As for the filmmakers and my pieces for RM? Well, I think they know where to look and doing so is up to them. As for Rob, he is in the stratosphere, hopefully relaxing when not working (and, we know, unfortunately hounded by paps too,) and exhausted when he is.
See ya
Jen,
Hope you are well.
I don't know if you get these notifications. It has been so very long. Hope you do.
Just a note to let you know that my 25th article about Remember Me was just posted on the site: rememberme-film dot com.
It is to mark the 2nd anniversary of RM's American release.
I called it: "Triumph over Tragedy in Remember Me: a new look at the ending".
I love the movie Remember Me! Yes it's sad, but what I loved the most was how well the realness/reactions/way families handled the grief was portrayed. What a great cast you had…they did a wonderful job! Great job Will on the story and I'm sorry for your losses. I personally didn't lose anyone on 9/11 and my heart goes out to all those that did lose loved ones that day. I own the movie (seen it 3 times at the theatre). I would love to read the book but am unable to order it so far….can you tell me how I can get a copy please? Thank you.
Just watched it on DVD rental. This was the first movie with a real 9/11 reference I have watched. It did happen that way. It was right out of the blue. And almost 10 years later it still feels that way. We were all consumed in our lives, dealing with what was happening in them and then it just happened. The writer, Will Fetters, captured that. I appreciate this movie. I am happy that Fetters needed this cathartic outlet, because the rest of us benefited from it too. I would recommend this film to others that were also in NYC or DC on 9/11 as well. Thanks.
My wife and I just read an excellent review on Remember Me. It's very balanced and articulates some points we really agree with! Answers the question "How do you recreate an event that came out of nowhere?" very well: http://t.co/CT8zcQq
Baxter and Jax
PS – enjoyed this interview!!
Just saw this surprise of a WONDERFUL film. Had no clue and what an impact and gift. I wanted to commend Mr. Fetters.
The wicked artistry, finesse and spot-on casting of this film held me. I also do not know Mr. Pattinson from his vampire franchise, (save inevitable commercials) and I'm glad. He has skill and grace and I'll be watching him.
This film made dealing with JokerTV for 3 months of free movie channels well worth it.
Thanks to all involved!