BOND GIRLS TOP 40: GIRLS 21-30
We are moving up the ladder and things are looking better...
 |
We're back with Bond Girls 21-30, which means we are certain to get into more of your favorites and I am sure get your opinions a little more stirred up.
As I said in the previous article this is all in replacement of doing generic reviews of the latest Fox Home Entertainment Ultimate James Bond DVD Collections, each of which is referenced along with each ranking giving you the ablility to check out the corresponding collection each of the ladies shows up in. With that said… let's get on with it…
 |
Okay, some of you may say this is too high and others will say it is too low for Grace Jones. Here's the deal… Grace scares the shit out of me. Yeah, look at the pic above, it was only appropriate for this lady. With that said, we also have to take into consideration what a night with Grace would be like. Yeah, it could get freak nasty. Then again, you could also die. It really is a toss up, but I felt to give her a lower rating would be disrespectful and any higher might give her ideas. |
 |
I'm all for short hair on females, but when Carey cut hers as she played Pam Bouvier in Licence to Kill it was a bad move and a move that earned her a spot at 29 rather than any higher. There are definite positives to Pam that need to be noted. 1) She can handle herself (example above) and 2) she doesn't wince when Benicio del Toro gets chopped up. Now that is a real lady, give her a gun and she is complete. However, the hair cut and the whining and complaining at the end of the movie when she thinks Bond has decided to go with the sexier Lupe Lamora places her right here where she belongs. |
 |
When her husband, media mogul Elliot Carver, calls her a terrible liar he isn't exaggerating. Paris Carver may be hot, but she is the cause of her own death and for a lot of Bond's problems at the beginning of Tomorrow Never Dies. Just a little white lie Paris, that is all we are asking for here. Luckily she is done in by one of the most incompetent assassins ever, but it was only right that her death be avenged by Bond and her lies are just a memory as the rest of the story moves on and so does our list. |
 |
If it wasn't for the forehead the size of a football field Kristina would be so much higher on this list, especially after her revealing getaway after stealing Bond's Faberge egg as she was left only in bra and panties below his balcony. Unfortunately, genetics and her desire to be with the slimy Kamal Khan is her ultimate downfall as she falls just shy of the top 25. |
 |
Cute is the word for Maryam, not sexy, which is why she is the last Bond Girl to fall just shy of the top 25. What Kara Milvoy has going for her though is that she is in the arguably best Bond film of them all, The Living Daylights. |
 |
Here is the girl Bond should have chosen at the end of Licence to Kill as opposed to the whiny Pam Bouvier. She's sexier and got that Puerto Rican blood flowing through her. Man, she is hot and has earned her spot at number 25. On top of all this there is a scene in the film where she is dressed in an amazing red dress… Do it, do it… How hot is this one time "Sports Illustrated" swimsuit model? You tell me. |
 |
Denise Richards is a high school graduate. Her character, Christmas Jones, is a nuclear chemist. Denise Richards is HOT, which is where the dilemma lies. I will remind you that this list is not based on looks alone, and I blame none of this casting debacle on Denise, she brought what she needed to for the role, and both of them look great. However, to cast her as a nuclear chemist is insane. Who thought this would work? I understand that we all want to see Denise Richards in a wet white t-shirt, but just cast her as Wet White T-Shirt Girl instead of a nuclear chemist with the worst Bond Girl name of them all. There is a line in The World is not Enough where Christmas tells Bond not to make fun of the name, if that line has to be written into the movie shouldn't that tell you to replace the name altogether? Denise, you're hot, but not as a nuclear chemist. |
 |
This is not Maud's only appearance on the list as she starred in another Bond movie as another Bond Girl, but first things first. Adams stars as the title character in Octopussy. In the film she runs a circus to cover up her jewelry smuggling ring, not exactly the most intriguing of Bond storylines but Maud at the age of 38 proves she still has it in her to be a Bond girl. |
 |
I respect the decision to go with Eva Green as Vesper Lynd in the latest Bond installment. The urge to go with some extreme sex pot must have been great, but Eva brings a bit of class and style to the part, on top of that she even brings a bit of sexiness. Just look at her, how can you deny those eyes? If you need further proof that Eva has what it takes, check out The Dreamers where she more than reveals what she has to offer. |
 |
Eunice pulled double Bond duty as the sex starved Sylvia Trench in both Dr. No and From Russia with Love, but unlike Maud Adams who will be seen again she is only getting credit for her part in Dr. No. Granted, she basically begs for it at the beginning of From Russia with Love, but when Bond is trying to do his work and she keeps bugging him that is uncalled for. However, in Dr. No, when she unexpectedly shows up in Bond's room wearing nothing but a dress shirt and practicing her putting… well, that fills the bill. Good on yah Sylvia. |
And there you have girls 21-30 as Bond Volume 4 takes this edition with four of the ten spots, followed by Volume 2 with three and Volume 1 with two. If you did not check out the 31-40 rankings you can do so right here and be sure to stay tuned for spots 11-20 tomorrow as we get closer to the number one Bond Girl of all-time. For more on any of the DVD sets click any of the links below:
Showing 2 Comments
~ PLEASE NOTE ~
If, in any way, your comment is an attack on the author of this post or a previous commenter, your comment will be deleted without question.
Add a New CommentNOTE: The Facebook login option has been disabled. We apologize for any inconvenience. |
Click to Read Our Commenting Rules & Guidelines
By the way, thanks again for your efforts:
30) This seems about right. It may be a minority view, but I find Grace Jones amusing, not scary. She's a big, spiky teddy bear of the sort you'd suddenly encounter in the deep woods of an after-hours club. Of course, there are those "don't feed the bears" signs.
29) Exactly right. Carey Lowell is a beautiful woman, with a much better body than any of the other female assistants who passed through the Law & Order show in the US. But George Lazenby must have advised her to get that haircut.
28) C'mon, Elliot Carver/Rupert Murdoch taking over the world is the source of our problems. Teri Hatcher is perfect. Even though she gets whacked early on, she's top 10.
27) Kristina Wayborn unraveling herself from the balcony ranks right up there with Ursula and Halle coming out of the water. You've got her about 12-15 spots too low.
26) Maryam D'Abo is very cute and has great chemistry with Dalton, which argues for moving her up. On the other hand, unless you really enjoy the Taliban, "The Living Daylights" is the most outdated Bond movie, whose ridiculous Cold War politics now seem criminally short-sighted. The second half should be burned.
25) Damn, you're right about Talisa Soto's hot bod, but she shouldn't be allowed to open her mouth on screen. She cannot act a lick; possibly, she should lick an act.
24) Which means this is the right place for Denise Richards. If you were just doing this list by hotness, Denise would be at or near the top. She's not a terrible actress, or at least she's in on the joke, but that still doesn't mean she should have taken the part.
23) Maud Adams is a beautiful woman, but her high plastic content gives me hives. Yes, in general, bigger is better, but real is better than fake. I'll give you one Maud Adams at 23, but that's it.
22) I understand your point about Eva Gree's vibe, but she doesn't do much for me.
21) Glad to see the beautiful Eunice Gayson get some recognition; she has a much better body than many of the women on this list, and a lovely face as well. Too bad she got phased out so quickly. Gayson was supposed to be Bond's girlfriend, but the producers eventually realize that it would not be all that cool to have her waiting by the phone while he was off effing anything else in a skirt.
Once again I can see your reasoning here and appreciate the insight of a true Bond fan.
My first comment on 21-30 is that I agree about Carey Lowell.With longer hair early in the movie she's an absolute fox.But after the haircut she really didn't do it for me and I would have chosen Lupe (Talisa Soto) at the end as well.
Second, Maryam d'Abo is definentaly a cutie and can really grow on you in some scenes.Also, I like the fact that you really like "The Living Daylights" and Timothy Dalton's Bond.
Third, I must say that you have class and taste to put Maud Adams in "Octopussy" so relatively high in your list.She may not appeal to everyone, but put your self in Bond's shoes (especially at Sir Roger Moore's age) and you'd be licking your chops.
Last but not least, I think Eunice Gayson should be higher on the list if only because of the famous scene with Sylvia Trench and Bond when Connery utters the first famous "Bond, James Bond",man that's classic right there.But Eunice should shoot up your list once you see her in that bikini in the beginning of "From Russia With Love".Women aren't built like that anymore and that hourglass figure is just dy-no-mite! Watch that scene again and tell me if she moves up on you or not.