Just when I think I’m warming up to Mikey “I Rock the Bass for God” Huckabee, he goes and says something so atrocious that I wish his God would get on with the Rapture and relieve us of his presence. The guy has a decent sense of humor, but I don’t think he was joking when he spouted the following toad shit on The View:

“People who are homosexuals should have every right in terms of their civil rights, to be employed, to do anything they want. But that’s not really the issue. I know you talked about it and I think you got into it a little bit early on. But when we’re talking about a redefinition of an institution, that’s different than individual civil rights. We’re never going to convince each other…But here is the difference. Bull Connor was hosing people down in the streets of Alabama. John Lewis got his skull cracked on the Selma bridge.”

Getting beyond the mind-numbing contradiction of his statement–”homosexuals should have every right in terms of their civil rights, to be employed, to do anything they want (unless of course they want to marry one another, fuck that shit Yaweh style)”–Huckabee displays a sickening level of callow ignorance here. Hmm yes, obviously Gay Bashing is a figment of the liberal media’s imagination, just like evolution and the First Amendment.

Apparently Huckabee forgot about the late Harvey Milk or Matthew Shepard (among the thousands of homosexuals murdered in the last quarter of a century). Or perhaps he thinks they were just a couple of queers who forgot to avoid bullets, fists, and fences.

I’m finished.

Filed under: Bitching, Politics: Alabama, Bull Connor, Civil Rights Movement, Gay marriage, Gay Rights Movement, Harvey Milk, John Lewis, Matthew Shepard, Mike Huckabee, The View

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Amanda flew out early Monday morning for Alabama. Real early. I didn’t even know the Eastern Iowa Airport had 5 am flights–so that meant we were up and moving at 3 in the goddamn morning. But it’s all good. A business trip for her new job, where she has already heard some encouraging news–but I’m not repeating it in order to avoid the dreaded jinx (and I’m not even superstitious).

She comes back tonight–just in time for me to drop her off at the curb and zip away to get a spot in line for The Dark Knight. So that basically means I’ve had 4 days of pure bachelorhood–late nights, lots of beer drinking, walking around in my underwear, not picking up anything, so on and so forth–although I do pretty much all these things when she’s home too, just not to this degree. It was a minor victory that I managed to shave yesterday. This experience has answered the eternal question of how quick can one man trash a perfectly clean apartment when his wife leaves. The answer: approx. 2 days.

Here’s a picture book of the last 4 days for you.

Day 1: Get Drunk with a Monkey

Day 2: Underwear Party

Day 3: Drink because there’s still beer in the Fridge

Day 4: Huh?!?

This all goes to show that I, like most married men, can’t function very well without my wife.

I’m finished.

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