That was a man with screen presence, in the truest sense. And a damn fine director to boot.

I’m finished.

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A 1-mile wide, F4/5 tornado cleaned Parkersburg, IA off the landscape like steel-wool over dust last night. The town is about 90 minutes north of where I live. 6 people died. Dozens more injured. In terms of infrastructure nothing appears to have survived.

Just about an hour or so before that happened, Brad B. texted me wondering if I was near the tornadoes and in any danger (if you’re reading this Brad, I sincerely thank you for the concern). I was at my 3-year-old niece’s birthday party sitting outside on a deck drinking beer. The clouds were dark, but not quite ominous yet, and we were all well aware the counties directly north of us were taking a whipping. I replied with a partially smartass/partially true statement, “We tend not to worry until a tornado is ripping the neighbor apart.”

Once summer hits in Iowa, tornado warnings become a weekly drill. And in the last decade, local news broadcasters have gone fucking batshit when it comes to covering weather–if it’s just a thunderstorm (no tornadoes) we’re talking at least 6 hours of nonstop coverage (yeah, I’m talking to you KCRG and Joe Winters, I practically see your boners lifting up the news desk when you’re reporting on severe weather). We’re numbed out. Don’t care. And the attitude of “well I’ll hit the basement when I see the tornado” is common (I’m in no way saying this was the practice in Parkersburg or any other town that was nailed yesterday, I’m just speaking in terms of myself, friends, and family).

My parents have definitely hammered this mindset into my brainpan from their examples. They’re the type who never went to the basement. In fact they’re the type who usually run to the windows or outside, my dad especially. I never saw him take to the basement. After all this is guy who at the age of 15 found a place in family and community legend when an F5 tornado (or at least a tornado on the path to twisting into a raging F5) landed in his cow pasture a quarter of a mile away from where he stood. While of course my grandma screamed her head off for him to hit the bunker, he remained outside for a few more moments snapping pictures. That tornado went on down the road and completely destroyed his hometown.

And I’m pretty sure until the day I die (which may be when a tornado lands on my head) I’ll probably remain the type who doesn’t get too worried until it’s actually happening…or too late. I wouldn’t so much call it a lack of fear (which could be mistranslated into courage of any sort). It’s more plain-ass stupidity and a lack of respect for Mother Nature. I’m pretty sure that’s what the residents of Parkersburg would call it if they came across these thoughts.

I’m finished.

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Prepare to meet Kali….in hell.

I’m finished.

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BOOKS I’M READING
Truman by David McCullough (it’s going to be like July when I finish this monster)
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers

MOVIES I’M WATCHING
Raiders of the Lost Ark
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Temple of Doom
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (fuck the mixed reviews)
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
The Final Season
The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian (2 hrs 20 mins of the suck)
Redbelt
Leatherheads (maybe)

TV I’M WATCHING
Ghost Hunters
The Deadlist Catch

CDs I’M LISTENING TO
Nine Inch Nails “The Slip”
David Bowie “The Best of David Bowie”

I’m finished.

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Speed Racer surprisingly kicked my ass yesterday. I had very little hope for it, and dare I say, I kind of loved it. I’m not a huge Wachowski Brothers fan (although I have technically liked all of their films). But this was by far my favorite film they directed (yes more that the first, and extremely overrated, Matrix). Speed Racer knew it was aiming for the family and kids and nailed it, unlike The Matrix film which think they are smarter than they actually are. It’s just pure fun. Anarchic and balls to the wall. Pure gonzo. Plus it was funny how the brothers worked in there quirks (S&M clothing, crossdressing, etc). How subversive.

Plus how can I not like a movie in which The Great John Goodman tosses ninjas around. And Christina Ricci hasn’t looked this hot for awhile. Now to some pics.

Well my ride is here. I got to get to Vancouver now.

I’m finished.

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Ok, it’s official: Hillary Clinton is completely batshit delusional.

I’m finished… and so should she be.

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…I just ripped a phone book in 2. Why? Because I’m a man! And I can. And it was one of those smaller width ones, which made it more difficult than normal–which makes me twice the man.

Weep at the sight of what my destruction hath wrought.

I’m finished.

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BOOKS I’M READING
Truman by David McCullough
A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius by Dave Eggers

MOVIES I’M WATCHING
Awake
The Diving Bell and the Butterfly
Vantage Point (ditto)
I’m Not There
Speed Racer
Crank (rewatch for like the billionth time)

TV I’M WATCHING
Breaking Bad

I’m finished.

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