“This shit just got real!”
Photo: Paramount Pictures/Sony Pictures

I find it funny that so many fanboys will defend the first Transformers flick until they die. However, they all realize that it is nothing more than a satisfying watch on DVD. The scene where Bumblebee pees on John Turturro is stupid. The scene where Optimus Prime and his lackys are stumbling around Shia’s backyard is stupid. And now more complaints about how the shots of the robots were close-ups and not full-sized looks are starting to sprout up here and there. Basically, it’s a movie with faults, but to admit that seems to be blasphemy if you owned the toys, watched the cartoon or read the comics.

I wonder what fanboys will say should Transformers 2 (officially known as Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen) follow the exact same outline. One thing is for certain, they hardly had a finished script when they began shooting what appears to be a rush job to meet the June 26, 2009 release date as Megan Fox has given some choice quotes to MTV.

“You know, we’ve been having script meetings, and we’ve been reworking the script, because they wrote it fast because of the writer’s strike,” she explained. “And, we’ve just been going through and trying to do some character stuff for Shia and myself in the middle of this crazy world that they’re in… Shia and I make out a little bit; I don’t know if anyone wants to see that.”

Yes! That is exactly what the fans want, more banter between Shia and Megan. Sure, she says this film will be just “as big as the first movie was,” and it’s not just bigger, it’s “10 times as big, 10 times as many set pieces, explosions, and acrobatic stunts.” I think we have seen this formula before and it was called Bad Boys 2.

Admittedly I liked both Bad Boys and Bad Boys 2, but I know many Michael Bay haters find it easy to shit on BB2, but if we are going to have more back-and-forth between LaBeouf and Fox as well as 10 times more action, then doesn’t that mean we are going to follow the Bad Boys mold and have a 25% longer film?

Bad Boys clocked in at just under two hours. Bad Boys 2 clocked in at just under two and a half hours. Transformers also just missed the 150 minute mark. Should I expect a Transformers 2 runtime of 187 minutes? Sounds only plausible to me based on all the shit that has to happen.

To make things even better Megan has the tall order of not even having to do much acting, “[Michael Bay's] main note to me is just to look hot; so I try my best.” Good on yah Megan, best of luck with that career.

I will ease off a bit and recognize that when Fox says, “It’s just going to be a badass movie. It’s just going to be a popcorn-visual-spectacle, summer film,” that this is really all Transformers 2 is and should be. I guess I am still disappointed the first film didn’t live up to my expectations of being a more adult film and was more for the kids. I guess that is why it made $319 million while managing a 57% rating at RottenTomatoes. We aren’t here to make “good” films per se, we are here to make films that go boom and make the audiences go, “Wheeeee!”

As far as Megan looking hot, we don’t need to look much further than just below…

Related post categories: Fanboy Frivolity, Movie News : Bad Boys II, Megan Fox, Transformers, Transformers 2: Revenge of the Fallen

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