So, I bought Grand Theft Auto IV for my PlayStation 3. The reason I snatched it up right away were due to the IGN 10/10 review, a perfect review from GamesRadar.com and when the lady being interviewed on Fox News told me you could have sex with a hooker and then beat her up. Basically it sounded perfect.

So, what are my first impressions after playing for about an hour or so last night? Well, aside from the fact that I was tired and that may have influenced my opinion, I am NOT IMPRESSED. At least, certainly not 10/10 impressed.

So far, the game should be called Taxi and not Grand Theft Auto IV. All I have done so far is go around picking people up and driving them around. I took what appears to be a very easy chick out on a date, helped my cousin out of a jam by using the absolute worst hand-to-hand fighting controls I have played since EA's NHL days of punch me, I punch you.

The driving is very finicky, but I am sure that takes some getting used to. The bowling is plain stupid and I had really hoped it would be a cool game inside the game (hopefully pool doesn't disappoint). The text messages you receive on your cell phone are virtually impossible to read without getting up close to your television and I am using a 42" plasma and set the picture to the best settings I could in order to try and read it just from across my living room.

So, what's good?

There are some good things right off the bat. The radio station selection is pretty cool, but I find myself turning it off about 50% of the time (again, it was late and I was tired). The cinematics are very well made and the opening cinematic really gets you into the game and its storyline.

As much as the driving takes some getting used to, running over pedestrians is sickly realistic. I could help but laugh as I am just cruising around Liberty City without shit to do, run over someone and then turn a 360 only to see there is blood on my hood. No, I do not actually run over people in real life and laugh as their blood spatters my paint job people, but inside the game I couldn't help but laugh at the realism.

The dialogue is also strangely impressive. Most oftentimes I find myself hating in game dialogue because it is too fake, but with this one you really get the feeling you are walking around in the belly of the city and this is how they would talk, but the dialogue is actually acted out quite well making it far less likely you will be hammering down on your "X" button to get to the next mission.

The graphics are insanely impressive and character movements are quite cool as well.

Should you not buy this game based on what I am saying?

I wouldn't judge this game on what I am saying so far. I don't think I have played nearly enough to judge it completely. After all, I don't even have a gun yet and haven't even tried the multiplayer. However, a few of my complaints are based on things that are going to be utilized throughout the rest of the game such as the text messages (that's how you get missions sometimes) and the hand-to-hand combat (I really don't know how they could have made this so impossible stupid). The driving just needs some getting used to, of that I am sure, and once I get a gun and even those kick ass looking rocket launchers life should be sweet. I am really looking forward to that.

For those of you that pick this up for the PS3, look for me online or add me to your list, my handle is simple... it's ropeofsilicon, you can't miss me! Perhaps you can blast me in multiplayer for bashing your favorite movies!